Hometown— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make the response more natural and concise: state the hometown clearly in one sentence, then add a brief specific detail. Correct grammar (e.g., "I lived" → "I live" if still living there) and avoid repetition of country name.

例: I come from Seoul, the capital of South Korea. It’s a large, fast-paced city known for its modern skyline and vibrant street food scene.

提案: Be clear and complete: start with a topic sentence, then give specific reasons and use linking words. Fix vocabulary and finish your thought. Avoid repetition and fragmented sentences.

例: I really appreciate the public transportation in Seoul. For example, the metro is extensive and punctual, and buses cover neighborhoods that trains don’t reach, so it’s easy to travel across the city without a car.

提案: Use correct tense and more concise structure: give a clear time statement, then briefly explain key life events with linking words. Avoid small grammar errors and awkward phrasing.

例: I have lived in Seoul for over twenty years. I grew up partly in another city, but I moved to Seoul when I started university and have stayed here since then.

提案: Provide a direct opinion followed by two specific reasons, using linking words to connect ideas. Improve grammar (plural/singular) and vary vocabulary to avoid repetition.

例: Yes, definitely. Seoul is excellent for young people because it has many universities offering diverse programs and a thriving job market with numerous technology and startup companies, so young graduates often move here to find good career opportunities.

× My hometown is Korea, South Korea and I lived in Seoul which is capital city in Korea.

✓ My hometown is Korea (South Korea), and I lived in Seoul, which is the capital city of Korea.

Missing definite article 'the' before 'capital city' and missing preposition 'of' before 'Korea'. Use commas to separate clauses and add 'the' because 'capital city' refers to a specific known city. Also add 'of' to show possession/relationship. Suggestion: Use 'the capital city of' when referring to a country's capital; include commas to set off nonrestrictive clauses.

× I would like to say public transport. I like my hometown pub public transportation.

✓ I would like to mention public transport. I like the public transportation in my hometown.

Awkward phrasing and missing preposition 'in' and the definite article 'the'. 'Mention' fits better than 'say' for stating a point. Use 'public transportation in my hometown' to indicate location. Suggestion: Use 'mention' for topics and include 'the' and 'in' to specify the service and location.

× We have a metro and we have a bus ride, so if you get on the bus, you don't.

✓ We have a metro and buses, so if you get on a bus, you do not need a car.

Original sentence ends with 'you don't' which lacks an object or verb and is incomplete. Replace 'bus ride' with 'buses' and clarify the intended meaning: using a bus removes the need for a car. Ensure a complete clause after 'you do not'. Suggestion: Always complete clauses; avoid dangling 'do/does/did' without an object or verb.

× I lived there for over 20 years.

✓ I have lived there for over 20 years.

Question 'How long have you lived there?' requires the present perfect tense to indicate an action that started in the past and continues to the present. Use 'have lived' instead of simple past 'lived'. Suggestion: Use present perfect ('have/has' + past participle) for actions that began in the past and continue now.

× Before when I was kids, I lived another city and when I went to university I moved to Seoul.

✓ When I was a child, I lived in another city, and when I went to university, I moved to Seoul.

Incorrect pronoun/phrase 'I was kids' should be 'I was a child' or 'when I was a kid'. Missing preposition 'in' before 'another city'. Add commas for clarity. Suggestion: Use singular 'a child' or 'a kid' with 'when I was' and include 'in' for locations.

× So I lived there for a long time.

✓ So I have lived there for a long time.

Context of continuing residence requires present perfect 'have lived' rather than simple past 'lived'. Keeps tense consistent with earlier corrections. Suggestion: Use present perfect for actions continuing to the present.

× Is your home town a good place for young people?

✓ Is your hometown a good place for young people?

Spacing or compound noun: 'home town' is more commonly written as the single word 'hometown'. This is an article/word-formation issue rather than article use; no article change needed. Suggestion: Use 'hometown' as one word.

× They have a lot of university to study and also they have lots of companies so they can get a job opportunity.

✓ There are many universities to attend, and there are many companies, so they can find job opportunities.

'A lot of university' is incorrect; use 'many universities' (countable). 'To study' is better as 'to attend' or removed. 'Lots of companies' is informal; 'many companies' is clearer. 'Get a job opportunity' is unnatural; use 'find job opportunities'. Suggestion: Use 'many' with countable plural nouns and choose verbs like 'attend' or 'study at' for institutions; pluralize 'opportunities'.

× So people want to get a good job and they move to my hometown.

✓ So people want to get good jobs, and they move to my hometown.

'A good job' suggests each person gets one job; plural 'good jobs' better matches generalization. Ensure verb agreement remains correct; here verbs are fine but noun number should reflect plurality. Suggestion: Use plural nouns when speaking generally about many people (good jobs, job opportunities).