Work— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cải thiện ngữ pháp cơ bản và trôi chảy: sửa các lỗi như 'from being university' → 'from university', dùng thì phù hợp và giảm ngập ngừng. Nên trả lời trực tiếp, ngắn gọn 1 câu chủ đề rồi thêm 1–2 câu hỗ trợ. Ví dụ: bắt đầu bằng 'I recently graduated from university' rồi tiếp 'I'm currently exploring job opportunities in the IT field and considering my future career path.'

例: I recently graduated from university. Currently, I'm exploring job opportunities in the IT field and thinking about my future career path.

提案: Cải thiện từ vựng chính xác và trật tự câu: dùng cụm đúng như 'part-time teacher at a technology school'; sửa tên môn chính xác (e.g., 'Scratch' not 'scrap') và giới thiệu nhóm tuổi rõ ràng. Hạn chế lặp lại từ và giữ tối đa 3–4 câu.

例: I work as a part-time teacher at a technology school. I teach subjects such as Scratch programming and Python to students aged 11 to 17.

提案: Cải thiện rõ ràng và cụ thể khi mô tả lý do: tránh nói lắp và sử dụng từ chính xác (ví dụ 'amenities' và liệt kê rõ ràng như 'training events, a well-equipped lab and a staff kitchenette'). Dùng liên từ để kết nối ý và nói ít nhất 2 câu để giải thích vì sao tốt.

例: Yes, definitely. My workplace offers useful amenities such as regular training events, a well-equipped computer lab and a staff kitchenette, which make my job easier and more enjoyable.

提案: Cải thiện cấu trúc câu và từ vựng mô tả con người: dùng cụm như 'I'm very fond of my workplace because my colleagues are friendly and supportive.' Tránh dùng từ không phù hợp ('spotty') và cung cấp ví dụ cụ thể. Viết 2 câu: ý chính + ví dụ cụ thể.

例: I am very fond of my workplace because my colleagues are friendly and supportive. For example, they always help me when I face problems or need advice.

提案: Sửa lỗi ngữ pháp và dùng từ chính xác ('career plans', 'an international company in India', 'gain experience', 'chance to communicate'). Nên trình bày rõ mục tiêu và lợi ích (2–3 câu) với liên từ hợp lý.

例: My future career plan is to work for an international company in India. I hope to gain valuable experience and have the chance to communicate with people from many different countries.

× I've recently graduated from being university so at the moment umm exploring different job opportunity in IT field and thinking about my future career.

✓ I've recently graduated from university, so at the moment I'm exploring different job opportunities in the IT field and thinking about my future career.

Use 'graduated from university' (no 'being'). Missing present continuous auxiliary 'am' for 'exploring'. 'Opportunity' should be plural 'opportunities' to match 'different'. Need article 'the' before 'IT field'. Use commas to join clauses. Suggestion: Use 'I've recently graduated from university' and 'I'm exploring different job opportunities in the IT field.'

× I'm a part time teacher as my technology school so I teach many subjects like scrap, Python, dramatic for this for this 11 to 17.

✓ I'm a part-time teacher at my technology school, so I teach many subjects like Scratch, Python and drama for 11- to 17-year-olds.

Use hyphenated 'part-time' as adjective. Use preposition 'at' not 'as' for workplace. Correct subject names: 'Scratch' (programming language) and 'drama'. Use 'and' between last items. Age range should be expressed as '11- to 17-year-olds' or 'students aged 11 to 17'. Suggestion: Say 'I'm a part-time teacher at my technology school' and 'I teach Scratch, Python and drama to students aged 11 to 17.'

× Yes, definitely. What's, uh, my workplace have many amenities like Thailand event advance at placement and refrigerator. So uh, which make uh, we make my jobs easiest and useful.

✓ Yes, definitely. My workplace has many amenities like a training area, an event space, a staff room and a refrigerator, which make my job easier and more efficient.

Use 'has' for singular subject 'workplace'. Replace unclear phrases with plausible nouns: 'training area', 'event space', 'staff room'. Use articles 'a'/'an'. 'Jobs' should be singular 'job'. 'Easiest' comparative should be 'easier', and 'more efficient' is clearer than 'useful'. Suggestion: Use clear nouns and correct verb agreement: 'My workplace has many amenities... which make my job easier.'

× Was I really keen on about my workplace is my college who are friendly and spotty. For example, they always have me uh whenever I have problems and uh facing difficulty.

✓ I am really keen on my workplace; my colleagues at college are friendly and supportive. For example, they always help me whenever I have problems or face difficulties.

Use 'I am' not 'Was I'. 'Keen on' takes an object directly: 'keen on my workplace'. 'My college who are' incorrect; use 'my colleagues ... are'. 'Spotty' is wrong word; 'supportive' fits. 'They always help me' is correct verb and object. Use parallel verbs 'have problems or face difficulties'. Suggestion: Say 'I am really keen on my workplace; my colleagues are friendly and supportive. They always help me when I have problems.'

× My future wealth plan is work in international company India. I can gain small experience and have change to communicate with with other people from many country in the world.

✓ My future career plan is to work for an international company in India. I can gain some experience and have the chance to communicate with people from many countries around the world.

Use 'career plan' rather than 'wealth plan'. Infinitive 'to work' required. Use 'for an international company in India' with articles and prepositions. 'Small experience' should be 'some experience'. 'Have change' should be 'have the chance' and avoid duplicate 'with'. Use plural 'countries'. 'Around the world' is natural. Suggestion: Say 'My future career plan is to work for an international company in India. I hope to gain some experience and have the chance to communicate with people from many countries.'