Work— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise and grammatically correct in the first sentence, and use a clear topic sentence followed by one or two supporting details. Correct subject-verb and article errors (e.g., "a student" not "a students"). Avoid hesitation words and filler sounds. Keep overall response to no more than 3–4 sentences.

例: I'm not working at the moment; I'm a student preparing to apply for a PhD program. At the same time, I am studying English to improve my language skills for academic research.

提案: Begin with a direct topic sentence and then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words (because, therefore, so). Reduce fillers like "uh" and avoid repetition ("quiet and calm" similar). Use precise vocabulary (e.g., "distractions" plural).

例: I usually study at home because I need a quiet environment to concentrate on my research and English study. As a result, I find I can focus better and complete tasks more efficiently.

提案: Avoid repeating ideas. Start with a clear opinion sentence and then provide coherent supporting details with a linking word. Correct unclear references ("UMM" is unexplained) and ensure consistency (home vs UMM). Keep within 2–3 sentences.

例: Yes, it's a very good place to work because there are no distractions and I have a dedicated workspace with everything I need. Consequently, I often feel more productive when I study there.

提案: This answer is strong but can be tightened by removing fillers and slightly varying vocabulary. Use one linking word to connect the reasons (for example, "because" or "and"). Keep it to two sentences to remain concise.

例: Yes, I enjoy my workplace because it provides a calm atmosphere where I can focus fully on my work. Additionally, a lovely park nearby allows me to take short walks to relieve stress.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence about immediate plans, then use a linking word (so/then) to explain the next steps. Remove hesitation and avoid repeating the same phrase ("research in anthropology" twice). Be specific about timeline or aims if possible.

例: At the moment I'm preparing my PhD application; if I am accepted, I will pursue doctoral studies in anthropology. Ultimately, I hope to conduct field research and publish my findings in academic journals.

× Neither I'm not working nor a students.

✓ Neither I'm working nor a student.

The noun 'students' is plural while the subject refers to a single person. Use the singular noun 'student' to match the subject. Also remove the extra 'not' after 'Neither' or restructure: 'I'm neither working nor a student.' Suggestion: say 'I'm neither working nor a student.' to sound natural.

× Currently I am applying for my PhD program and studying English.

✓ Currently I am applying for my PhD program and studying English.

No correction needed for tense; sentence is grammatically correct. It uses present continuous appropriately to describe ongoing actions. Keep as is if intended.

× Where do you work?>

✓ Where do you work?

The original transcription includes an extraneous '>' character, which is not grammatical. Remove the symbol so the question is properly formatted.

× Most of the time I study at home.

✓ Most of the time I study at home.

No correction needed; sentence is grammatically correct. 'Most of the time' is an acceptable adverbial phrase and 'at home' is correct.

× So it's a great place and uh, there's no distraction.

✓ So it's a great place and, uh, there are no distractions.

'Distraction' here should be plural 'distractions' because the context refers to general interruptions (countable, plural). Also 'there are' agrees with the plural noun. Suggestion: use 'there are no distractions' for naturalness.

× Yes, I think so. I think it's a great place to work because there's no extra distractions or noise and UMM.

✓ Yes, I think so. I think it's a great place to work because there are no extra distractions or noise, and, umm,

'There's' is a contraction of 'there is', which is singular; it does not agree with the plural noun 'distractions'. Use 'there are' with plural nouns. Also 'umm' is filler; keep it separated by commas. Suggestion: 'there are no extra distractions or noise.'

× I just set up a dedicated workplace at the UMM with everything I need, so I often feel more productive when I study at home.

✓ I just set up a dedicated workspace at UMM with everything I need, so I often feel more productive when I study at home.

'Workplace' is acceptable but 'workspace' is more idiomatic. The definite article 'the' before an institution name like 'UMM' is optional and often omitted unless referring to a building known as 'the UMM'. If UMM is the university name, omit 'the'. Suggestion: 'a dedicated workspace at UMM.'

× Would you like the place where you work?

✓ Do you like the place where you work?

Question 'Would you like the place where you work?' sounds like asking if they would desire to have that place; the intended meaning is likely 'Do you like the place where you work?' which matches context. Use 'do' to ask about preference in present tense.

× Yes, I really enjoy the place where I work.

✓ Yes, I really enjoy the place where I work.

Sentence is correct; no change needed. 'The place where I work' is specific and uses the definite article appropriately.

× The main reason is that it just creates A, umm, a wonderful atmosphere where I can fully focus on my work without any distraction.

✓ The main reason is that it creates, umm, a wonderful atmosphere where I can fully focus on my work without any distractions.

Capitalize 'A' is incorrect in mid-sentence; remove. 'Creates' is fine. 'Any distraction' should be plural 'any distractions' to refer generally to interruptions. Also place fillers with commas. Suggestion: 'it creates, umm, a wonderful atmosphere... without any distractions.'

× Also, there's a lovely park nearby so I can take a short walk to relieve stress.

✓ Also, there's a lovely park nearby, so I can take a short walk to relieve stress.

Sentence is correct grammatically, but add a comma before 'so' to connect clauses. 'There's' is fine with singular 'park.'

× Currently I am working on my PhD program application, so if things go well I will focus on my study in anthropology and hopefully one day I could, umm, conduct my research in anthropology.

✓ Currently I am working on my PhD program application, so if things go well I will focus on my studies in anthropology and hopefully one day I will conduct my research in anthropology.

Use 'studies' (plural) when referring to academic study in a field. For future intent after 'if things go well' use 'will' consistently instead of mixing 'will' and 'could' for the same planned future action. 'Could' implies conditional or possibility; 'will' expresses planned outcome. Suggestion: 'I will focus on my studies in anthropology and hopefully one day I will conduct my research in anthropology.'