Work— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 文の構造が不安定で繰り返し（uh, I, I）や不自然な語句（"study money about management"）があるため、明確で流暢な表現を練習してください。具体的には：1) はっきりしたトピック文を使う（"I'm a university student."）。2) 不要なフィラー（uh, um）を減らす。3) 専攻を説明する際は正確な語彙を使う（"I study management and English" または "I study business and English"）。4) 追加情報は1〜2文にまとめ、接続語（because, and, so）でつなげる練習をする。

例: I'm a university student. I study management and English, and I want to improve my English skills so I can work internationally.

提案: 単語選択や文法の誤り（"Sushi's restaurant"や"the price of Hokkaido"）があり、意味が分かりにくいので、明確で簡潔に伝える練習をしてください。具体的には：1) 場所名や職業を正確に言う（"I work at a sushi restaurant in Susukino."）。2) 不要なフレーズは避ける。3) 客層やどの言語を使うかを説明する場合は、一文でまとめ、接続語を使う（"I often speak English with foreign customers."）。

例: I work at a sushi restaurant in Susukino. I often speak English with foreign customers, so I'm improving my conversational skills.

提案: 答えは基本的に良いですが、反復を避け、より自然な接続表現を使って理由を述べると良いです。具体的には：1) トピック文で簡潔に答える（"Yes, it's a good place to work."）。2) 理由を述べるときは接続詞（because, since, as）でつなぎ、具体例を加える（"I enjoy talking with customers about their cultures"）。3) 文を2～3文に収める。

例: Yes, it's a good place to work because I love sushi and enjoy talking with customers about their cultures and travel experiences.

提案: 文が途切れており意図が不明確なので、希望を明確に表現する練習が必要です。具体的には：1) 助動詞や語順に注意して一文で要点を述べる（"I'd prefer a workplace where I can use English more."）。2) 追加の詳細は具体例で補足する（"for example, where most staff and customers speak English"）。3) 不要な数字表現（"2/3 of students"）は具体的に言い換える（"most colleagues"）。

例: I enjoy my current job, but I'd prefer a workplace where I can use English more often, for example, somewhere most colleagues and customers speak English.

提案: 意味をはっきりさせる必要があります。現在の発言は語順や語彙の誤り（"friends Pran"）があり混乱しています。具体的には：1) トピック文で将来の計画を明確に述べる（"I want to be a sports interpreter."）。2) どのスポーツか、その理由や計画（学ぶこと、経験）を一文で補足する（"I especially want to interpret at baseball games and work in English-speaking environments."）。3) フィラーを減らして文を短くまとめる。

例: In the future I want to work as a sports interpreter, especially for baseball, and I hope to work in environments where I can use English regularly.

× I'm a student of university and uh, I usually study money about management and English.

✓ I'm a university student and I usually study management and English.

The phrase 'student of university' is unnatural; use 'university student'. 'Study money about management' is incorrect word order and word choice; likely meant 'study management'. Simplify to 'study management and English'. Use 'I' capitalized and remove filler 'uh'.

× I I'd like to learn more skills of English.

✓ I'd like to learn more English skills.

'Skills of English' is awkward; use 'English skills'. Also remove duplicated 'I' and contraction 'I'd' is appropriate. Maintain infinitive 'to learn'.

× I work at Sushi's restaurant in Suskino. Uh, the price of Hokkaido and uh, I. Usually use English for English customers.

✓ I work at a sushi restaurant in Suskino. I usually use English with English-speaking customers.

Use 'a sushi restaurant' instead of brand-like 'Sushi's restaurant'. Fragment 'the price of Hokkaido and uh, I.' is unclear and removed. Use preposition 'with' and the adjective 'English-speaking' to describe customers.

× And this is because I love sushi and I like to talk with customers about cultures and other things.

✓ This is because I love sushi and I like to talk to customers about culture and other topics.

Use 'talk to' rather than 'talk with' in this context (both possible but 'talk to customers' is more natural). 'About cultures' is plural but 'culture' as a topic is fine; 'other things' is vague, replace with 'other topics'.

× Yes, but actually I'd like to work place where. Use English more and like such as 2/3 of students and.

✓ Yes, but actually I'd like to work in a place where I can use English more, perhaps where two-thirds of the customers are English speakers.

Original is fragmented and missing prepositions and verbs. Add 'in a place where I can use English more'. Clarify 'such as 2/3 of students' to 'two-thirds of the customers are English speakers' for meaning; use words for fractions.

× My future work friends Pran is uh, sports interpreter like baseball interpreter, uh, I like to work in the place where, uh, where I use English.

✓ In the future I want to work as a sports interpreter, for example as a baseball interpreter. I would like to work in a place where I can use English.

The original lacks clear subject and verb. Rephrase to 'I want to work as a sports interpreter'. Remove filler 'uh' and duplicate 'where'. Use 'I would like' and 'can use English' for ability and desire.