Work— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Reduce filler phrases and keep within 3–4 sentences.

例: I am a first-year student at Belarusian State University, studying pharmaceutical chemistry. I enjoy this field because it offers many opportunities for research, and I particularly like hands-on laboratory work, which lets me apply theory to real experiments.

提案: Answer directly and avoid vague idioms like "hit the big time." State your current situation and one clear future plan. Use linking words to show relation between present and future.

例: I don't work at the moment because I am a student. However, I plan to work at a university in the future, preferably as a faculty assistant, so I can gain teaching and research experience.

提案: Avoid hesitations and conditional phrasing. Give a clear opinion and support it with specific reasons. Use linking words like 'because' or 'for example' to structure your answer.

例: Yes, I think a university would be a great place to work because it offers many opportunities for research and professional development. For example, I could collaborate with experienced researchers and attend seminars to improve my skills.

提案: Be careful with unclear negatives and fillers. Decide whether the job is demanding or not and state reasons clearly. Replace fillers with concrete details about work-life balance and benefits.

例: Yes, I would like it because the working hours are flexible — for instance, I could start at 10 AM — which would allow me to balance studies and work. Additionally, the salary would be reasonable enough to support my living expenses.

提案: Make your grammar and word choice clearer. State a specific goal, then give reasons and an example of what you expect to gain. Use linking words such as 'because' or 'so that'.

例: I plan to move abroad to work for an international company because I want to gain broader professional experience and improve my organisational skills. For example, working in a multinational team would expose me to different working standards and help me become more disciplined.

× I'm a first year student at the Belarusian State University.

✓ I'm a first-year student at Belarusian State University.

Use hyphen in compound adjective 'first-year' and omit the definite article before most university names in English; 'Belarusian State University' is a proper name, so 'the' is usually not used. Improve by writing 'first-year' with a hyphen and dropping 'the'.

× I'm majoring in chemistry, pharmaceutical chemistry.

✓ I'm majoring in chemistry, specifically pharmaceutical chemistry.

Use a linking phrase to show specification. 'Specifically' or 'in particular' clarifies the relationship. This avoids awkward noun juxtaposition.

× I really like this branch of science as there is much to explore and investigate.

✓ I really like this branch of science because there is much to explore and investigate.

Use 'because' rather than 'as' for clarity in spoken answers; grammatically 'as' can be used but may be ambiguous. No agreement error here, but improvement in conjunction choice makes sentence clearer.

× Moreover, I really like the practical part where I can do something by myself.

✓ Moreover, I really like the practical part where I can do things myself.

Use plural 'things' for a general statement and omit 'by' before 'myself'—'do things myself' is the natural collocation. This corrects awkward phrasing.

× As I have already mentioned, I'm a student and I don't work, but I have a plan and I suppose I will hit the big time by this.

✓ As I mentioned, I'm a student and I don't work, but I have a plan and I suppose I will hit the big time because of it.

'By this' is not a natural way to refer to a plan; use 'because of it' or 'because of that'. Also 'As I have already mentioned' can be shortened to 'As I mentioned' for smoother speech.

× I'm planning to be an employee in a university to be the assistant of the professor.

✓ I'm planning to work at a university as an assistant professor.

'An employee in a university' is wordy; 'work at a university' is natural. 'The assistant of the professor' is awkward—use 'an assistant professor' (an academic title) or 'an assistant to a professor'. Choose based on intended meaning. Adjust articles accordingly.

× I will pretend that I am, uh, already working at the university of my dream, so it is a wonderful place to work as there are different possibilities for me as a young chemist who is not yet educated so much.

✓ I will pretend that I am already working at the university of my dreams, so it would be a wonderful place to work because there are different opportunities for me as a young chemist who is not very experienced yet.

Use 'university of my dreams' (idiomatic) or 'the university of my dreams' — here 'of my dreams' is correct. 'Possibilities' is better as 'opportunities'. 'Not yet educated so much' is ungrammatical; use 'not very experienced yet'. Also adjust tense/modal: 'would be' fits hypothetical. These changes correct article and phrasing errors.

× Yes, as my job is not demanding and really time consuming, I can be, uh, I can start my morning at 10 AM and still manage to do everything that I have planned and also work at my uh job uh, moreover, it provides me with uh, good wealth, so.

✓ Yes, because my job is not demanding and not very time-consuming, I can start my day at 10 a.m. and still manage to do everything I have planned and work at my job; moreover, it provides me with a good income.

'Time-consuming' needs a hyphen as a compound adjective; place adverbs ('not very') correctly. 'Start my morning' is unnatural—'start my day' is preferred. 'Work at my job' is redundant; simplify to 'work'. 'Good wealth' is incorrect collocation—use 'a good income' or 'financial security'. Also remove filler 'uh' for clarity.

× I would like to move to another country to work with international companies in order to be well developed person and more organized as international companies very strict in.

✓ I would like to move to another country to work with international companies in order to become a well-developed and more organized person, because international companies are very strict.

Use 'become' rather than 'be' for developing a quality. Add articles: 'a well-developed person'. 'Well developed' should be hyphenated when used as adjective before noun. Finish the clause with a full verb: 'are very strict'. These changes fix modal/infinitive usage and sentence completion.