Advertisement— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: 発音や語法の誤り（“childhood childhood”の重複）を直し、主題文を明確にした上で、具体的な詳細（どのキャラクターか、どんな場面か、どのように感じたか）を1〜2文で補足するとより自然で効果的です。また、接続詞（for example, because）を使って理由と結果をはっきり示しましょう。

Ejemplo: I vividly remember a Disney TV commercial from my childhood. It showed Mickey and friends singing in a colorful parade, which felt heartwarming and made me excited to visit Disneyland because the music and visuals seemed magical.

Sugerencia: 語彙の選択と文法を改善しましょう（“careful”は不自然、“offer ties”は意味不明）。一つの主題文で回答し、その後に具体例（どの種類の広告か、誰に訴えるか）を1〜2文で補足し、接続詞（for example, because）で論理をつなげてください。

Ejemplo: Yes, I often see many advertisements on trains when I commute. They are usually clear and eye-catching, and for example I often notice ads for new apps, local events and retail sales because trains have a captive audience.

Sugerencia: 文法と語順の誤りを直しましょう（“your advertisements”は面接官には不適切、“used to really colorful”は誤用）。一文で立場を示し、続けて具体的な理由と影響（どのデザイン要素が印象的か、何を学んだか）を述べてください。

Ejemplo: Yes, I like some advertisements, especially university campaigns. I find them fascinating because their bold colors and creative layouts catch my attention, and I learned about visual design techniques such as typography and composition from them.

Sugerencia: 内容は良いですが表現を自然にし、冗長な語を削りましょう（“well produced”は通常“well-produced”）。具体例では、何が記憶に残ったのか（音楽、撮影、ストーリー）を明確に述べると効果的です。接続語（for example, which made me）を正確に使いましょう。

Ejemplo: I prefer amusement park advertisements because they are usually well-produced and detailed. For example, a recent commercial with a catchy song and colorful scenes made the park seem exciting and unforgettable, which made me want to visit.

Sugerencia: 文法と語順を簡潔にし、冗長な表現を避けましょう（“use and watch on my phone”は不自然）。一文で頻度を述べ、次に具体的な例や理由（どんな広告が多いか、どう感じるか）を付け加えてください。

Ejemplo: Yes, I often see ads on my phone and computer because I use my smartphone a lot. Many of them are short video ads or banner ads, and I find some of the videos exciting because they are colorful and well-edited.

× I remember a Disney TV commercial from my childhood childhood.

✓ I remember a Disney TV commercial from my childhood.

The sentence repeats the word 'childhood' accidentally, creating an unnecessary duplication. Remove the duplicate word to make the sentence grammatically correct and concise. Suggestion: Proofread to catch repeated words.

× It was colorful and heartwarming with familiar characters singing, and it stayed in my mind because it made me feel excited and want to visit Disneyland.

✓ It was colorful and heartwarming, with familiar characters singing, and it stayed in my mind because it made me feel excited and want to visit Disneyland.

The original sentence is mostly correct but needs a comma before the clause 'with familiar characters singing' for clarity. Also the structure 'made me feel excited and want to visit' is acceptable; no tense change needed. Suggestion: Use commas to separate descriptive phrases for readability.

× Yeah, so I often see a lot of advertising on trains when I commute.

✓ Yeah, I often see a lot of advertising on trains when I commute.

The word 'so' is unnecessary and informal in this context; removing it improves clarity. The present simple tense 'see' correctly describes habitual action, so no tense change is needed. Suggestion: Avoid filler words for concise answers.

× They are usually careful and easy to read, so many people notice them and I found them quite interesting because they offer ties, new apps or local events.

✓ They are usually clear and easy to read, so many people notice them, and I find them quite interesting because they advertise sales, new apps, or local events.

'Careful' is not appropriate to describe advertisements; 'clear' is better. 'I found' mixes past with present habitual context; use 'I find' to match 'are' and habitual observation. 'Offer ties' is likely a lexical error; replace with 'advertise sales' or a suitable phrase. Also add commas for clarity. Suggestion: Match verb tenses for consistent time reference and choose correct adjectives and verbs for meaning.

× I like your advertisements, especially the university campaign.

✓ I like those advertisements, especially the university campaign.

'Your advertisements' is odd in this context; the student is speaking generally, so 'those advertisements' or 'the advertisements' is more appropriate. Use pronouns that match the referent. Suggestion: Use demonstrative pronouns for general references rather than 'your' unless addressing the examiner's ads.

× I find these fascinating because they used to really colorful designs and creative layouts, and I learned about the visual design from them.

✓ I find them fascinating because they have really colorful designs and creative layouts, and I learned about visual design from them.

'These' should refer to 'advertisements'—use 'them' or 'the ads' for clarity. 'Used to really colorful designs' is ungrammatical; use 'have really colorful designs.' 'The visual design' can be 'visual design' without 'the.' Suggestion: Use correct verb forms ('have') to describe current attributes and match pronouns to nouns.

× I like amusement park advertisements because they are usually well produced and very detailed.

✓ I like amusement park advertisements because they are usually well-produced and very detailed.

Compound adjective 'well-produced' should be hyphenated when placed before a noun; though here it's after 'are,' hyphen is optional, but hyphenation clarifies the compound modifier. Sentence otherwise correct. Suggestion: Use hyphens in compound adjectives when needed for clarity.

× For example, a recent commercial I saw featured the lead character singing, which made me memorable and fun to watch and want to go.

✓ For example, a recent commercial I saw featured the lead character singing, which made it memorable and fun to watch and made me want to go.

'Made me memorable' is incorrect; the commercial (it) is memorable. Also combine verbs clearly: 'made it memorable and fun to watch and made me want to go.' Ensure pronouns refer to the correct noun and parallel structure is maintained. Suggestion: Keep pronoun references clear and maintain parallel verb structures.

× I also see advertisements when I use and watch on my phone because I always use smartphone wherever so I can watch the advertisements and commercial.

✓ I also see advertisements when I use my phone because I always carry my smartphone wherever I go, so I can watch the advertisements and commercials.

Original has several issues: 'use and watch on my phone' is awkward—use 'use my phone.' 'Use smartphone' needs an article: 'my smartphone.' 'Wherever so' is incorrect order; use 'wherever I go, so...' Also 'commercial' should be plural 'commercials' to match 'advertisements.' Suggestion: Use proper prepositions and articles ('my phone', 'wherever I go'), maintain correct word order, and pluralize consistently.

× It's really exciting.

✓ It's really exciting.

This sentence is grammatically correct; no article or tense change needed. Keep as is. Suggestion: No change required.