Part 1
Examinador
Did you have a bike when you were a child?
Candidato
Yes I did. I remembered it was my father who bought a bike for me and my grandfather who had who is passed away and taught me how to ride a bike. It takes me like a month to learn to do it but it was a great fun.
Examinador
Do you think bikes are popular in your country?
Candidato
Yes, bikes are extremely popular in China, ranging from personal bikes to shared bikes and even electric bikes. I think it's a very uh, eco friendly way to ride a bike to get around to the city and sometimes uh, I often ride a bike to go to see.
Did you have a bike when you were a child?
Puntuación: 65.0Sugerencia: 回答内容基本直接,也包含了买车人和学习经历等细节,但语法和表达错误较多,影响自然度和清晰度。应将过去时统一为过去时,例如用“remembered/remember”时保持一致,并把“my grandfather who had who is passed away”改为“my grandfather, who has passed away”。“It takes me like a month”应改为“It took me about a month”,“a great fun”应改为“great fun”。此外,可以使用“Although”和“but”等连接词组织信息,并避免重复或不完整的从句。
Ejemplo: Yes, I did. My father bought me a bike when I was a child, and my grandfather, who has passed away, taught me how to ride it. It took me about a month to learn, but I really enjoyed the experience.
Do you think bikes are popular in your country?
Puntuación: 72.0Sugerencia: 回答直接回答了问题,并列举了私人自行车、共享单车和电动自行车,内容较具体。不过,“a very eco friendly way to ride a bike”表达重复,应改为“an eco-friendly way to travel”;“get around to the city”应改为“get around the city”。最后的“go to see”意思不完整,应明确说“go sightseeing”或“visit nearby places”。建议减少“uh”等填充词,并用“For example”连接个人经历,使答案更流畅。
Ejemplo: Yes, bikes are extremely popular in China, including personal bikes, shared bikes, and electric bikes. They are an eco-friendly and convenient way to get around the city. For example, I often cycle to nearby parks or shops instead of taking a bus.
× I remembered it was my father who bought a bike for me and my grandfather who had who is passed away and taught me how to ride a bike.
✓ I remembered that it was my father who bought a bike for me and that my grandfather, who has passed away, taught me how to ride it.
原句中有多个从句连续堆叠,且“my grandfather who had who is passed away”结构混乱。使用两个“that”引导宾语从句,并用逗号分隔非限制性定语从句,可以使句子结构更清晰。建议在一个句子中避免连接过多从句;表达“记得某人做了某事”时,可以使用“remember that + 从句”。
× I remembered it was my father who bought a bike for me and my grandfather who had who is passed away and taught me how to ride a bike.
✓ I remembered that it was my father who bought a bike for me and that my grandfather, who has passed away, taught me how to ride it.
“pass away”是不及物短语动词,不能使用“is passed away”这种被动结构。应说“has passed away”或“passed away”。由于这里表示祖父已经去世并且这一事实与现在有关,使用现在完成时“has passed away”更自然。
× It takes me like a month to learn to do it but it was a great fun.
✓ It took me about a month to learn how to ride it, but it was great fun.
整段是在回忆童年经历,因此应使用过去时。“takes”应改为“took”。另外,“learn how to ride it”比“learn to do it”更明确,因为前文谈论的是学习骑自行车。口语中“like a month”可以改为更自然、准确的“about a month”。
× It takes me like a month to learn to do it but it was a great fun.
✓ It took me about a month to learn how to ride it, but it was great fun.
“fun”通常是不可数名词,表示“很有趣”时不使用不定冠词“a”。因此不能说“a great fun”,应说“great fun”。
× I think it's a very uh, eco friendly way to ride a bike to get around to the city and sometimes uh, I often ride a bike to go to see.
✓ I think it’s a very eco-friendly way to get around the city, and I often ride a bike around the city.
“get around”表示“在某地四处走动”时,后面直接接地点,因此应说“get around the city”,而不是“get around to the city”。“around the city”表示“在城市里四处”,比“to the city”更符合语境。