Bike— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: Be more concise and correct minor errors. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct phrasing (e.g., "playing outdoors" not "playing Hindus"), avoid repetition, and add one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Keep answers under five sentences.

Ejemplo: No, I didn’t have a bike as a child because my parents thought it wasn’t appropriate for girls. Instead, I spent most afternoons playing outdoors with my friends, doing games like hide-and-seek and card games. As a result, I still had a lot of fun and learned teamwork.

Sugerencia: Improve accuracy, clarity and cohesion. Use consistent tense, avoid repetition, and link ideas with connectors (e.g., "however", "now"). Provide a specific example or brief comparison to support your view. Keep it within four sentences.

Ejemplo: Yes, bikes used to be popular because parents often rewarded good school results with a bicycle. However, nowadays many families buy smartphones instead, especially since social media and mobile games appeal to children. For example, my cousin received a phone last year rather than a bike.

× No, I didn't have a bike as a child because my parents thought it wasn't appropriate for a girl's ride.

✓ No, I didn't have a bike as a child because my parents thought it wasn't appropriate for a girl to ride one.

The phrase 'a girl's ride' is awkward and incorrect in context. Use the structure 'appropriate for a girl to ride' to show who performs the action and what the action is. This corrects the adjective/noun usage and clarifies meaning. Suggestion: Use 'appropriate for a girl to ride one' or 'appropriate for girls' depending on generalization.

× Instead, I spent most of my childhood playing Hindus with friends, games like hide and seek, and board games.

✓ Instead, I spent most of my childhood playing with friends, playing games like hide-and-seek, and playing board games.

'Playing Hindus' is incorrect and unclear; likely intended 'playing with friends'. The list of activities needs parallel structure: use the same verb form ('playing') before each item. Hyphenate 'hide-and-seek' as a compound noun. Suggestion: Maintain parallel verb forms in lists ('playing X, playing Y, and playing Z').

× So I so had a lot of fun without a bike.

✓ So I still had a lot of fun without a bike.

The repeated 'so I so' is incorrect. Use 'still' to indicate continuation or 'so' once for emphasis: 'So I had a lot of fun.' 'Still' fits context better. Suggestion: Remove the extra 'so' and choose the appropriate adverb ('still' or single 'so').

× Yes, bikes are popular in my country because whenever a child got a good score in school, his parents will get a bike for them.

✓ Yes, bikes are popular in my country because whenever a child got a good score in school, his or her parents would get a bike for them.

Mixed tenses and pronoun agreement cause errors. 'Got' (past) should pair with 'would' for habitual past actions, not 'will'. Also 'his parents will get a bike for them' mixes singular and plural pronouns; use 'his or her parents would get a bike for him or her' or more naturally 'their parents would get them a bike'. Suggestion: For gender-neutral language, use plural: 'whenever children got good scores, their parents would get them bikes.'

× But not anymore. I think not anymore.

✓ But not anymore. I don't think so anymore.

'I think not anymore' is unidiomatic. Use 'I don't think so anymore' to express current opinion. Also keep consistency between sentences: 'But not anymore' and 'I don't think so anymore.' Suggestion: Use common negative present-tense construction 'I don't think so'.

× Now because of these social media and phone mostly child prepared to get a smartphone.

✓ Now, because of social media and phones, most children prepare to get a smartphone.

Several issues: 'these social media and phone' is incorrect—use 'social media and phones' (no 'these') and pluralize 'phone' to 'phones'. 'Mostly child prepared' is ungrammatical; use 'most children prepare' or 'children mostly want to get a smartphone'. Tense and subject-verb agreement adjusted to present simple to describe current trend. Suggestion: Use 'most children' (plural) and natural verb order: 'most children want to get a smartphone' or 'most children are preparing to get a smartphone' depending on meaning.