Paper— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: Be more fluent and accurate: avoid filler words (uh, umm), use correct verb forms and clearer vocabulary. Start with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Keep it within 3–4 sentences. For example, say you made a simple fan as a child and describe briefly how or who helped you.

Ejemplo: No, I haven't made many paper crafts. When I was a child I made a simple paper fan with my grandmother, who showed me how to fold and glue the paper. It was small but I enjoyed decorating it with colored pencils.

Sugerencia: Improve grammar and cohesion: remove hesitations and fix articles and verb forms (e.g., "started to write letters"). Begin with a clear topic sentence, then use linking words (for example, "before that") to provide specific details (occasions, who wrote letters and why). Limit to 3–4 sentences and use varied vocabulary like "occasions", "correspondence".

Ejemplo: Yes, I still write physical letters on special occasions. For example, after I got married I sometimes write handwritten letters to my husband for our anniversary or his birthday. Before that, I remember my father used to send letters to my mother when he was traveling abroad.

Sugerencia: Clarify meaning and use accurate vocabulary: replace unclear phrases ("became real") and wrong words ("meals" -> "emails"). Use linking words such as "however" and give specific examples of occasions when people keep letters. Keep sentences concise and correct grammar (e.g., "depend heavily on emails and messaging apps").

Ejemplo: I think fewer people keep handwritten letters today because most communication is done via emails and messaging apps. However, people still write and keep letters for special occasions, such as love letters, family heirlooms, or formal invitations.

Sugerencia: Use simple, accurate sentence structures and avoid repetition. Correct word choice ("bring" not "beg"), and improve coherence: state the general answer, then give clear examples. Use linking words like "for example" and "but". Limit to 3 sentences and check word order and articles.

Ejemplo: It depends on where I am going. For example, I always bring a pen and some paper when I go to the library to take notes, but I usually don't carry them when I'm hanging out with family or friends.

Sugerencia: Be specific and correct vocabulary: replace unclear words ("bented", "write my suit to analyze it"). Start with a clear topic sentence about drawing, then add a linked detail about later writing for relaxation. Use past tense correctly and provide concrete examples (what you drew; what you wrote). Keep to 3–4 sentences.

Ejemplo: As a child I liked drawing on paper, especially flowers, trees and houses. Later, when I was older, I began writing in a notebook whenever I felt overwhelmed because it helped me relax and organize my thoughts.

× Actually not, I'm not a big fan of uh, art or uh, crafts.

✓ Actually, no. I'm not a big fan of art or crafts.

Replace 'Actually not' with 'Actually, no' for natural negation. No tense or agreement problem here but wording was awkward; this improves fluency.

× Uh, I remember that when I was a child, I just make a fan, buy one paper or umm, a tail.

✓ Uh, I remember that when I was a child, I just made a fan, using a piece of paper, or a kite.

The sentence refers to a past time ('when I was a child'), so the verb should be past tense ('made' not 'make'). 'Buy one paper' is incorrect; use 'a piece of paper'. 'a tail' is unclear; likely 'a kite' fits. Use 'using' to show the material.

× Uh, but I remember my grandma was make a quote by paper, but I don't make anything large.

✓ Uh, but I remember my grandma made paper cutouts/quotes, but I didn't make anything large.

Use past tense 'made' instead of 'was make'. For the contrast, use past negative 'didn't make' to match the past timeframe. Clarify 'quote by paper' as 'paper cutouts' or 'quotes written on paper'.

× Actually, after I got married, I started the to write letter to my husband in a specific occasion such as anniversary or his birthday.

✓ Actually, after I got married, I started to write letters to my husband on special occasions such as our anniversary or his birthday.

Remove the extra 'the'. Use plural 'letters' for repeated actions. Use 'on special occasions' (preposition and adjective usage) and 'our anniversary' for clarity. 'Such as' should be followed by examples.

× But before that, uh, I know about the letter from my mother and dad 'cause my dad was traveled a period of time and he used to send a message to my mom by letters.

✓ But before that, I knew about letters from my mother and father because my dad traveled for a period of time and he used to send messages to my mom by letter.

Use past tense 'knew' to match timeframe. 'Mother and dad' -> 'mother and father' is more natural. 'Was traveled' is incorrect; use 'traveled'. 'A period of time' -> 'for a period of time'. Use 'send messages by letter' or 'send letters'.

× No, I don't think that handwritten became real nowadays because most people depend many on meals and uh, communi communications apps.

✓ No, I don't think handwritten letters are common nowadays because most people rely heavily on mobile and messaging apps.

'Handwritten became real' is incorrect; use 'handwritten letters are common' (present tense statement about current state). 'Depend many on meals' is incorrect: likely 'rely heavily on mobile and messaging apps'. Use correct verbs and collocations.

× But I think sometimes people write handwritten specially for special occasion to a partner or one of the family, sometimes for a formal letter.

✓ But I think sometimes people write handwritten letters, especially for special occasions, to a partner or a family member, and sometimes for formal letters.

Use 'handwritten letters' (noun), 'especially' not 'specially', plural 'occasions', 'a family member' is correct, and improve parallelism and article use.

× Actually, it depends about the place where I will go.

✓ Actually, it depends on the place I am going to go.

Use 'depend on' not 'depend about'. Match future intention with 'I am going to go' or simple present 'I go' depending on context.

× For example, if I will go to the library, for sure I will beg to the paper and pen.

✓ For example, if I go to the library, I will definitely bring paper and a pen.

In conditional clauses of this type, use present tense 'if I go' not 'if I will go'. 'Beg to the paper and pen' is incorrect; correct verb is 'bring' and include articles 'paper and a pen' or 'some paper and a pen'.

× But if I I will hang out with my family or friends, I don't think I will need it to pick it.

✓ But if I hang out with my family or friends, I don't think I will need to bring them.

Remove duplicate 'I'. Use present tense in the 'if' clause. 'Need it to pick it' is ungrammatical; use 'need to bring them' referring to paper and pen.

× Uh, paper and uh, Ben with me, umm, because we cannot place anything with.

✓ Uh, I don't usually carry paper and pens with me because we can't leave things unattended.

Original is fragmented and unclear. Clarify subject and verb: 'I don't usually carry'. 'Ben' -> 'pens'. 'We cannot place anything with' unclear; likely means 'we can't leave things unattended' or 'we can't bring bulky items', so provide a clear alternative.

× Actually, when I was a child, I used to draw on the paper such as uh, flower tree and houses and uh bented.

✓ Actually, when I was a child, I used to draw on paper, such as flowers, trees, houses, and birds.

Use plural nouns 'flowers, trees, houses'. 'Bented' is incorrect; likely 'birds' or 'boats'—'birds' fits common drawings. 'On paper' is more natural than 'on the paper'.

× But after I get sometimes older, I started to write my suit to analyze it it especially when I feel overwhelmed because it helped me to relax.

✓ But as I got older, I started to write things down to analyze them, especially when I felt overwhelmed, because it helped me relax.

Match past timeline: 'as I got older' and 'I started'. Use 'write things down' not 'write my suit'. Use 'them' to refer to 'things'. Consistent past tense 'felt' and 'helped'. Remove redundant words and correct collocations.