Parks— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: Be consistent in tense and avoid filler sounds. Start with a clear topic sentence in past tense, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Reduce hesitation (uh) and minor grammar errors (e.g., 'I really liked' not 'I really like').

Ejemplo: Yes, I really liked going to the park when I was a child. My mother took me there often because she was worried about my eyesight, and I used to play games with my kindergarten friends on the grass.

Sugerencia: Answer directly and use clear grammar. Begin with a concise topic sentence (e.g., 'Not really'), then give one or two specific reasons with linking words. Avoid repetition and incorrect plural/singular forms ('work' not 'works').

Ejemplo: Not really. As an adult I am busy with work and hobbies, and I’m not very into sports, so I rarely visit parks except on special occasions.

Sugerencia: Give one clear opinion and support it with specific, well-linked reasons. Avoid repeating phrases (e.g., 'environment' twice). Use precise descriptions (e.g., 'hear birds' not 'sea kinds of birds').

Ejemplo: Yes, I would. Parks improve air quality and provide green spaces for people to relax, and having a park near home lets you enjoy fresh air and listen to birdsong, which lifts your mood.

Sugerencia: Be specific about the park and clarify why you want to visit. Use linking words to connect reasons and avoid vague phrases like 'in some sense'. Keep sentences concise and grammatical.

Ejemplo: I would like to visit New York's national parks, especially the Adirondacks, because my English textbook described their scenery and wildlife in detail, and I want to see if they are really as beautiful as the book says.

× Yeah, I really like going to the park when I was a child, 'cause my mom was worried about my eyesight, so we just went out and, uh, played with my kindergarten friends.

✓ Yeah, I really liked going to the park when I was a child, 'cause my mom was worried about my eyesight, so we just went out and played with my kindergarten friends.

The sentence mixes present tense 'I really like' with past time reference 'when I was a child' and past verbs 'was worried', 'went', 'played'. This is a tense consistency error. Use the past tense 'liked' to match the rest of the sentence. Suggestion: keep the whole recollection in past tense for clarity.

× Probably not because I'm adult and busy with my works and hobbies.

✓ Probably not because I'm an adult and busy with my work and hobbies.

Errors: missing article before 'adult' and incorrect plural 'works'. 'Adult' as a singular count noun requires the indefinite article 'an'. 'Work' in this context is an uncountable noun referring to employment or tasks, so use singular 'work'. Suggestion: use 'an adult' and 'work'.

× I'm not. I'm not actually a sports type that remains so I don't really want to go to parks and they're so types of entertainment.

✓ I'm not. I'm not actually a sporty type, so I don't really want to go to parks; they are not the kind of entertainment I enjoy.

The original has awkward phrasing and incorrect word choices: 'sports type that remains' and 'they're so types of entertainment' are ungrammatical. Replace 'sports type' with 'sporty type' (adjective) and restructure the sentence with a clear conjunction 'so'. Use 'they are not the kind of entertainment I enjoy' to express preference. Suggestion: simplify and use standard collocations like 'sporty', 'the kind of entertainment'.

× Yeah, I think it's helpful for the environment, and this can help us to emphasize the importance of the environment.

✓ Yeah, I think it's helpful for the environment, and it can help us emphasize the importance of protecting it.

Repetition of 'the environment' is awkward and 'this' is unclear; 'it' referring to 'parks' is better. Also add 'protecting' to clarify what importance is being emphasized. This fixes clarity and cohesion. Suggestion: avoid repetitive nouns and use clear pronouns and verbs.

× And if you have parks around your house, you can breathe the fresh air and the sea kinds of birds.

✓ And if you have parks around your house, you can breathe fresh air and see various kinds of birds.

Errors: 'breathe the fresh air' should be 'breathe fresh air' (no article), and 'the sea kinds of birds' is incorrect; likely intended 'see various kinds of birds'. Use verb 'see' not 'the sea'. Also 'kinds of birds' needs a modifier like 'various'. Suggestion: use 'breathe fresh air' and 'see various kinds of birds'.

× I think that's cheerful.

✓ I think that's pleasant.

'Cheerful' describes people or moods, not places or the feeling gained from parks. 'Pleasant' or 'refreshing' is a better collocation to describe parks or the effect of fresh air. Suggestion: choose adjectives that collocate with the noun you describe.

× I think it will be the New York National Park because I saw lots of descriptions of this park in some sense or my English textbook.

✓ I think it will be New York National Park because I saw many descriptions of this park in my English textbook.

Minor issues: 'the New York National Park' may not need 'the' if it's the name; keep name form 'New York National Park'. 'Lots of' is informal; 'many' fits spoken/written balance. Remove unclear phrase 'in some sense or'. Suggestion: use 'many descriptions' and remove unclear fillers.

× So I really wonder how this park is, and it's really as good as the description in the book.

✓ So I really wonder what the park is like, and whether it is really as good as the description in the book.

Use the expression 'what the park is like' instead of 'how this park is'. Also add 'whether' to introduce the doubt about comparison. Maintain present simple 'is' for general truth and 'wonder' for present feeling. Suggestion: use standard collocations 'what ... is like' and 'whether ...'.