Parks— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: Be more concise and correct minor grammar (use articles and past tense consistently). Begin with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific supporting detail. Reduce hesitations (uh) and avoid repeating the same idea twice.

Ejemplo: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. For example, I often visited the local park with my mother when I felt upset, and we would spend hours playing games with neighborhood friends, which left me with many happy memories.

Sugerencia: State your opinion clearly, use correct subject-verb agreement and article use, and avoid filler words. Use one linking phrase to introduce a specific reason and provide a brief example to support it.

Ejemplo: Not really. Nowadays parks are often crowded; for instance, many people jog on walkways meant for pedestrians, which makes it difficult to relax or walk safely.

Sugerencia: Good clear opinion. Improve by adding a specific benefit of more parks and one concrete example. Replace vague phrases and keep to two or three sentences.

Ejemplo: Yes, I would. More parks would encourage people to spend time outdoors and socialize; for example, community parks with seating and playgrounds could host weekend gatherings and group activities.

Sugerencia: Use formal contractions and avoid fillers. Start with a direct statement, then give specific reasons and one concrete activity you would do. Keep it within three sentences.

Ejemplo: Yes, I'd like to visit a Disney park in the future because it offers many themed attractions and live shows. For example, I would go with friends to enjoy the rides, take photos, and have a picnic in the park's outdoor area.

× I've made so many good memories at park.

✓ I've made so many good memories at the park.

The noun 'park' is a singular, countable noun and needs a definite article 'the' because it refers to a specific place previously implied; use 'the park' rather than 'park'. Suggestion: Use 'the' before singular countable nouns when referring to a specific or known place.

× I used to go to park with my mom a lot when I, uh, used to feel sad or gloomy.

✓ I used to go to the park with my mom a lot when I, uh, used to feel sad or gloomy.

Same article issue: 'park' as a specific, singular countable noun requires the definite article 'the'. Suggestion: Say 'go to the park' when talking about a particular park or parks in general as places you visited habitually.

× I've made so many memories there playing in the fields with a bunch of friends.

✓ I've made so many memories there, playing in the fields with a bunch of friends.

While the primary problem is punctuation rather than article, the original sentence is acceptable grammatically; adding a comma improves clarity by separating the adverbial phrase 'there' from the participial phrase 'playing in the fields'. Suggestion: Use a comma after short adverbial locators when followed by a participial clause to improve readability.

× these days parks are crowded and I see a lot of people, uh, jogging in the park at the wrong area.

✓ these days parks are crowded and I see a lot of people, uh, jogging in the park in the wrong area.

The phrase 'at the wrong area' uses an incorrect preposition; 'in the wrong area' is the proper prepositional phrase for being located inside an area. Alternatively 'in the wrong part' could be used. Suggestion: Use 'in' for locations within areas, or use 'in the wrong part' to be more natural.

× there's a specific designated area for joggers, but I see people jogging on a non jogging pavement which make parks really annoying.

✓ there's a specific designated area for joggers, but I see people jogging on a non-jogging pavement, which makes parks really annoying.

Multiple errors: 'non jogging' should be hyphenated as a compound adjective 'non-jogging' and 'which make' must agree with singular subject 'pavement' (or the clause) and be 'which makes'. Also adding a comma before 'which' improves sentence structure. Suggestion: Hyphenate compound modifiers before nouns and ensure subject-verb agreement: singular subject requires singular verb.

× a lot of people these days just stay at home staring on their mobile phone screens.

✓ a lot of people these days just stay at home staring at their mobile phone screens.

The verb 'stare' takes the preposition 'at' when indicating the object looked at; 'staring on' is incorrect. Use 'staring at' or 'looking at'. Suggestion: Use 'stare at' or 'look at' for directing gaze toward something.

× I wish people would go out and socialize and interact and have fun instead of just sticking at home.

✓ I wish people would go out and socialize and interact and have fun instead of just staying at home.

The verb 'stick' is not used with the preposition 'at' to mean remain in a place. The correct verb is 'stay' or 'staying'. 'Staying at home' is the proper phrase. Suggestion: Use 'stay/staying at home' to express remaining at home.

× I do wanna visit Disney park.

✓ I do want to visit Disney Park.

'Wanna' is informal colloquial speech and should be rewritten as 'want to' in standard grammar. Also 'Disney Park' is a proper noun and should be capitalized; consider 'Disneyland' or 'a Disney park'. Suggestion: Use 'want to' in formal writing and capitalize proper nouns; if referring to one of the Disney parks, say 'a Disney park' or the specific name.

× I've, uh, there are a lot of uh, activities that you can join and have fun.

✓ There are a lot of activities that you can join and enjoy.

The original mixes present perfect 'I've' with a new clause 'there are', creating a fragment and disfluent structure. Removing the extraneous 'I've' and fillers yields a clear sentence; 'have fun' can be replaced with 'enjoy' for conciseness. Suggestion: Avoid unnecessary fillers and ensure one independent clause per sentence structure.

× I think it would be fun if I go out with my friends and make some memories and take pictures and even have a picnic there.

✓ I think it would be fun if I went out with my friends, made some memories, took pictures, and even had a picnic there.

After 'would be' expressing a hypothetical, the subordinate clause should use the past subjunctive/past tense 'if I went' rather than 'if I go'. Also sequence of verbs in a conditional should match tense: 'went... made... took... had'. Suggestion: Use past tense after hypothetical 'would' in conditional clauses: 'if I went... I would...' or rephrase to 'it would be fun to go out with my friends'.