Parks— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: Improve grammatical accuracy and sentence structure: start with a clear topic sentence, use past tense consistently, avoid awkward connectors like "aside from" at sentence starts, and limit to 3–4 concise sentences. Add one specific detail about activities or memories to make it more vivid. Use linking words correctly (for example, "and", "so", "also").

Ejemplo: I loved going to parks as a child; I felt like I was on cloud nine when my parents took me. I could run around on the grass and make new friends on the swings. Also, the park was free, so my parents often took me there instead of paid activities.

Sugerencia: Be concise and correct verb forms: begin with a direct topic sentence, use correct articles and prepositions ("green areas", "a breath of fresh air"), and connect ideas with linking words like "because" or "so". Provide one specific reason or recent example to support your answer.

Ejemplo: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because green areas give me a breath of fresh air. As an office employee, I often spend long hours indoors, so a short walk in the park helps me relax and clear my mind.

Sugerencia: Use clearer structure and correct expressions: replace "In one hand" with "On the one hand" or simply "For example" and avoid repetition. Give two distinct, specific benefits and link them with connectors like "first" and "second" or "also". Fix grammar ("it also helps preserve green areas").

Ejemplo: Yes, I would like more parks in the city. For example, children would have safe places to play, and dog owners would have areas to exercise their pets. Also, more parks would help preserve green space and improve air quality.

Sugerencia: Improve fluency and grammar: use full sentences, correct tense and articles ("one of the parks", "I want to visit","I've ever seen"). Avoid casual slang like "wanna" in formal tests. Provide a specific name or feature of the park and one clear reason with linking words ("because", "for example").

Ejemplo: Yes, I would like to visit a park in Tulsa, USA, called River Parks. I want to go because it is very large and has extensive playgrounds for children and trails for walking dogs. For example, I would like to try the riverside walking paths and visit the playgrounds with my family.

× As a child it feels that I'm on cloud 9 if my parents brought me to the park.

✓ As a child, I felt like I was on cloud nine when my parents brought me to the park.

Tense mismatch: the sentence mixes present tense 'feels' and present continuous 'I'm' with a past context 'As a child' and 'brought'. Use past tense 'felt' and 'was' to match the time frame; also use 'when' instead of 'if' to indicate a past habitual event. Add commas for clarity.

× Aside from I can run around, I met new kids that turns to friends.

✓ Besides being able to run around, I met new kids who became friends.

Incorrect structure and verb forms: 'Aside from I can run around' is ungrammatical; use 'Besides being able to run around' or 'Aside from being able to run around'. 'Turns to friends' is wrong tense and relative pronoun; use past 'became' and 'who' for people.

× Additionally, it is free so my parents wouldn't have to pay for me to play.

✓ Additionally, it was free, so my parents did not have to pay for me to play.

Modal/past mismatch: 'wouldn't have to' implies conditional or future-in-past; describing past habitual fact requires simple past 'did not have to'. Also match 'it was free' to past context.

× Yes, I still like going to parks now aside from I love going to greenery area, it also feels a breath of fresh air.

✓ Yes, I still like going to parks. Besides, I love going to green areas; it also feels like a breath of fresh air.

Awkward phrasing and mixed structures: 'aside from I love' is incorrect — use 'Besides' or 'Also'. 'Greenery area' is incorrect collocation; use 'green areas'. 'Feels a breath' needs 'feels like a breath' and sentence splitting improves clarity.

× As an employee, I have always been in the office and being in the park would make me happy.

✓ As an employee, I am usually in the office, and being in the park makes me happy.

Tense and participle use: 'I have always been in the office' suggests a perfect continuous state; 'usually' fits habitual present. 'Being in the park would make me happy' is conditional—use simple present 'makes' to state a general truth about outcome. Keep parallel structure.

× Yes, that would be great if I can see more parks in the city.

✓ Yes, that would be great if I could see more parks in the city.

Modal verb mismatch: 'would be' in the result clause pairs with 'could' (past/modal subjunctive) to express hypothetical desire. Use 'could' to match conditional mood.

× In one hand, kids can play and as well as dogs can freely play in the parks.

✓ On one hand, children can play, and dogs can also run freely in the parks.

Collocation and quantifier issues: use 'On one hand' (common phrase). 'Kids' can be 'children' for formality. 'As well as dogs can freely play' is incorrect word order; simplify to 'and dogs can also run freely'.

× Additionally, it is also to preserve green areas in the city.

✓ Additionally, it would help preserve green areas in the city.

Missing verb and incorrect construction: 'it is also to preserve' is ungrammatical. Use 'it would help preserve' or 'it would also preserve' to show purpose/benefit. 'Help preserve' is more natural.

× Yes, one of the park that I want to go is in Tulsa.

✓ Yes, one of the parks that I want to visit is in Tulsa.

Singular/plural and verb usage: 'one of the park' should be 'one of the parks' because 'one of' requires plural noun. Use 'visit' instead of informal 'go' and correct relative clause 'that I want to visit.' Also keep 'is in Tulsa.'

× Why I wanna go there it's because they have a very beautiful park where kids can freely play and as well as their pets such as dogs.

✓ I want to go there because they have a very beautiful park where children and their pets, such as dogs, can play freely.

Informal contractions and incorrect sentence structure: 'Why I wanna go there it's because' is ungrammatical; use 'I want to go there because'. Use 'children' not 'kids' for formality. 'And as well as their pets' is redundant—use 'and their pets' and place modifiers correctly. 'Can play freely' is natural word order.

× Also, it is one of the biggest park I ever seen.

✓ Also, it is one of the biggest parks I have ever seen.

Tense and singular/plural: 'one of the biggest park' needs plural 'parks'. 'I ever seen' is nonstandard past; use present perfect 'I have ever seen' to express experience up to now.