Parks— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: Be more concise and avoid fillers (uh). Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details. Correct small grammar errors (e.g. "visit the that park" → "visited that park"). Use linking words such as "because" or "so" to connect ideas.

Ejemplo: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. There was a park near our home in Hong Kong, and my parents often took my brother and me there, so we spent many afternoons playing on the swings and having picnics.

Sugerencia: Give a clear direct answer first, then explain briefly with specific reasons. Remove hesitations and finish sentences. Mention concrete facts (e.g. "there are no public parks near my house"). Use a linking phrase like "because" or "since" to show cause.

Ejemplo: Not really — I don't enjoy parks as much now because I moved from the city to a rural area in Mariveles and there are no public parks nearby, so I rarely have the chance to visit one.

Sugerencia: Answer directly and then give one or two specific reasons. Replace informal words like "greeneries" with "green spaces" and avoid contractions and colloquialisms ('cause). Use linking words such as "especially" and "because" correctly and keep sentences concise.

Ejemplo: Yes, I would. My neighborhood currently lacks playgrounds and green spaces for children, and having more parks would provide safe play areas and a refreshing environment for families.

Sugerencia: Start with a direct statement of which parks you want to visit. Be specific about what attracts you (design, cleanliness, variety of plants). Avoid repetition and correct grammar (e.g. "how beautifully they are shown in pictures"). Use linking words like "because" to explain reasons clearly.

Ejemplo: I'd love to visit the parks in Singapore, because they look beautifully landscaped in photos and are known for clean, well‑designed spaces; I want to experience their atmosphere and enjoy the fresh air in person.

× As a child, I really enjoyed going to the parks, especially because, uh, there was a park nearby our house when I was in Hong Kong and during that time, my parents and I often visit the that park and I had a fun time playing with my brother.

✓ As a child, I really enjoyed going to parks, especially because there was a park near our house when I lived in Hong Kong, and during that time my parents and I often visited that park and I had a fun time playing with my brother.

The phrase 'there was a park nearby our house' is awkward; use 'a park near our house' for correct prepositional phrasing. Also 'when I was in Hong Kong' is better as 'when I lived in Hong Kong' for clarity. 'Visit' should be past tense 'visited' to match the past timeframe. Remove the extra article 'the' before 'that park'. Overall this fixes 'there be' phrasing and aligns verb tenses. Suggestion: use 'there was' + noun phrase 'a park near our house' and ensure verbs match past tense (visited).

× I believe that I don't enjoy parks as much as I enjoyed it when I was younger and maybe that is because, uh, growing up and since I have moved in, uh, from the city to this rural area in Mariveles, there are no parks that I can.

✓ I believe that I don't enjoy parks as much as I did when I was younger, and maybe that is because, having grown up and moved from the city to this rural area in Mariveles, there are no parks near me.

Mixes present and past incorrectly: 'as much as I enjoyed it when I was younger' should be 'as much as I did when I was younger' to avoid repeating 'enjoy'. 'Since I have moved in from the city' is awkward; use 'having grown up and moved from the city' or 'since I moved from the city'. The clause 'there are no parks that I can' is incomplete; clarify as 'there are no parks near me'. Ensure tense consistency and complete sentence structure. Suggestion: replace 'enjoyed it' with 'did', use 'moved' or 'having moved', and complete the final clause with 'near me'.

× I would definitely want to see more parks in my city, especially because I'm currently where I live in, there are actually no parks that children can play around and I'd really love to see more greeneries around me 'cause that gives me a refreshed feeling.

✓ I would definitely like to see more parks in my city, especially because where I currently live there are actually no parks for children to play in, and I'd really love to see more greenery around me because it makes me feel refreshed.

Use 'there are' correctly: 'where I currently live there are' (no extra comma). 'Want to' is acceptable but 'would like to' is more natural in this context. 'Parks that children can play around' is incorrect preposition/structure — use 'parks for children to play in'. 'Greeneries' is uncountable; use 'greenery'. 'That gives me a refreshed feeling' is awkward; use 'it makes me feel refreshed'. Fixes include 'there be' phrasing, preposition use, article/count noun usage, and adverbial clarity. Suggestion: remove redundant commas, use 'parks for children to play in', and 'greenery' as uncountable noun.

× I would really love to visit the parks in Singapore because aside from seeing how beautiful, how beautifully it was me these are made in pictures, I would really love to experience the vibe of the park and enjoy that refreshing air from the from my surroundings.

✓ I would really love to visit the parks in Singapore because, aside from seeing how beautiful they look in pictures, I would love to experience the vibe of the parks and enjoy the refreshing air of the surroundings.

Original sentence has several problems: 'seeing how beautiful, how beautifully it was me these are made in pictures' is ungrammatical — use 'seeing how beautiful they look in pictures'. 'It was me these are made' is incorrect word order and pronoun use. Repetition 'I would really love' can be simplified. 'Enjoy that refreshing air from the from my surroundings' contains duplicated 'from' and awkward preposition; use 'enjoy the refreshing air of the surroundings' or 'enjoy the refreshing surrounding air'. Fixes include incorrect use of pronouns, incorrect phrasing of adjective/adverb forms, and redundant words. Suggestion: use 'they look in pictures', avoid redundant phrases, and correct prepositions.