Parks— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: Cần cải thiện tính mạch lạc và ngữ pháp. Trả lời nên bắt đầu bằng câu chủ đề rõ ràng, tránh câu rời rạc như “But then now” và lỗi từ vựng/ngữ pháp (ví dụ “the noun in the present”). Sử dụng liên từ để nối ý (e.g., "however", "but", "now") và cung cấp chi tiết cụ thể (ví dụ: những thứ khiến công viên đẹp hơn trước: nhiều cây cối, yên tĩnh, ít khói bụi). Giữ độ dài dưới 5 câu.

Ejemplo: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child because they were peaceful and full of trees. However, I think parks are less attractive now due to pollution and crowding. For example, there used to be more green spaces and fewer cars, which made them more pleasant to visit.

Sugerencia: Cần sửa ngữ pháp và cấu trúc câu, tránh câu ngắt quãng như “Go around.” và lỗi từ vựng như “stirring” hay “exclusive stressful”. Nên có câu chủ đề + câu bổ sung có liên từ, nêu rõ tần suất và lý do một cách ngắn gọn, cụ thể (ví dụ: thời lượng, hoạt động tại công viên, cảm giác). Giữ 2–4 câu tự nhiên.

Ejemplo: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks. I cycle there almost every day and ride around the paths for about 30 minutes. This helps me relax and relieve stress after a long day at work.

Sugerencia: Nội dung tốt nhưng cần sửa ngữ pháp (subject-verb agreement: "parks contain"), lựa chọn từ chính xác ("polluted by companies"), và làm rõ mạch ý bằng liên từ. Bạn có thể thêm một ví dụ cụ thể về lợi ích (như giảm nhiệt độ, cải thiện tinh thần). Giữ câu ngắn gọn và rõ ràng.

Ejemplo: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because industrial pollution has degraded air quality. More parks would provide green spaces and trees, which can help people relax and improve the local air. For example, new trees could reduce heat in urban areas and encourage outdoor exercise.

Sugerencia: Cần chỉnh ngữ pháp, phát âm tên địa điểm và từ vựng chính xác ("Yellowstone National Park", not "Parks"; "geysers" not "Gators"), và tránh câu dài lủng củng. Trả lời nên bắt đầu bằng một câu chủ đề và mô tả cụ thể về lý do muốn đến đó (ví dụ: những cảnh quan, hoạt động, động vật hoang dã). Giữ trong 2–4 câu mạch lạc.

Ejemplo: Yes, I would love to visit Yellowstone National Park in the United States. It is famous for its geysers, hot springs, forests, and diverse wildlife. I want to go there to relax and to see these natural features and animals in person.

× When I went to the parks, it was really beautiful in my memory.

✓ When I went to the park, it was really beautiful in my memory.

'Parks' should be singular 'park' if referring to parks in general memory one visited; also the main issue is past-tense usage is acceptable but the student likely meant a general past habit — keep past tense 'went' and 'was'. Suggest using 'parks' vs 'park' consistently depending on meaning: 'the park' for a specific place or 'parks' for plural. Use singular if speaking of the idea of a park remembered as beautiful.

× But then now.

✓ But now things are different.

The original fragment 'But then now.' is incomplete and mixes past marker 'then' with present 'now'. Replace with a complete clause that contrasts past and present. Use 'but now' + main clause.

× But the noun in the present, I think parks in that present is not beautiful as the parks in the past.

✓ But at present, I think parks now are not as beautiful as parks used to be.

Original sentence has awkward structure and incorrect comparative form. Use 'at present' or 'now' to indicate current time, plural subject 'parks' requires plural verb 'are', and comparative should be 'not as beautiful as'. Also remove unnecessary phrase 'the noun'.

× Now every day I ride a bicycle to go to the parks.

✓ Now I ride a bicycle to go to the park every day.

Word order and article use: 'every day' typically follows the verb or phrase 'go to the park every day'. Use singular 'the park' if referring to a habitual destination; if plural intended, then 'parks' could be used but verb and article must match. Present simple 'ride' is correct for habitual action.

× Go around.

✓ I ride around the park.

Fragment 'Go around.' lacks subject and proper tense. Combine with prior sentence or make it a full clause: 'I ride around the park.' uses present simple for habitual action.

× It is help me relax after, uh, stirring.

✓ It helps me relax after, uh, tiring work.

'It is help' is ungrammatical; use third-person singular 'helps'. 'Stirring' is incorrect word choice—likely 'tiring'. Also restructure to 'after tiring work' for clarity.

× Work hard or doing some jobs that are exclusive stressful.

✓ working hard or doing some jobs that are extremely stressful.

Fragment lacks connection and parallel structure. Use gerund 'working' to match 'doing', and 'exclusive stressful' is incorrect; correct phrase is 'extremely stressful'. Combine with previous clause: 'after tiring work, working hard, or doing extremely stressful jobs.'

× Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because now cities in Vietnam are being polluted by the company, so more parks contains more green spaces and trees.

✓ Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because cities in Vietnam are being polluted by companies, so more parks would contain more green spaces and trees.

Problems: 'the company' is unspecified—use plural 'companies' or 'industry'. 'Parks contains' is subject-verb agreement error; 'parks' requires 'contain'. Also conditional 'would contain' is natural when stating a benefit. Adjust article usage accordingly.

× This will help people in place to relax and improve air quality.

✓ This will help people in the area relax and improve air quality.

Phrase 'people in place' is incorrect; use 'people in the area' or 'people in that place'. Also remove unnecessary 'to' after 'help' when followed by bare infinitive 'relax'.

× Yes, there are many paths that I want to go to in the future.

✓ Yes, there are many places that I want to go to in the future.

The student likely meant 'places' or 'parks' rather than 'paths'. If they meant specific parks or locations, use plural 'places' or 'parks'. 'Paths' is odd when referring to destinations.

× For example, Yellowstone National Parks in United States has deserved landscapes such as Gators, hot spring or forests.

✓ For example, Yellowstone National Park in the United States has deserved landscapes such as geysers, hot springs, and forests.

Use singular 'Yellowstone National Park' and include definite article 'the United States'. 'Deserved' is wrong word choice—perhaps 'deservedly famous' or just 'spectacular'. 'Gators' is wrong in this context; Yellowstone is known for 'geysers' (not 'gators'). Also use plural 'hot springs' and list with conjunction 'and'.

× So in the future, I would like to go there to relax to explore is beautiful features and wildlife.

✓ So in the future, I would like to go there to relax and to explore its beautiful features and wildlife.

Original has repetition 'to relax to explore' lacking conjunction and has pronoun error 'is' instead of 'its'. Use parallel infinitives 'to relax and to explore' or 'to relax and explore', and correct possessive 'its'.