Building— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: 발음과 문장 구조를 정리하고, 불필요한 반복을 줄이며 명확한 주제문과 근거를 간결하게 제시하세요. 예: 'There aren’t any tall buildings near my house'로 시작한 후, 이유나 비교(예: 제 집은 1층이고 주변 건물은 낮음)를 한두 문장으로 덧붙이세요. 또한 'there are no'와 'there aren't any' 같이 중복된 표현을 피하세요.

Ejemplo: There aren’t any tall buildings near my house. My home is in the Kadura area and most buildings are only a few stories high, so the skyline looks low and residential.

Sugerencia: 의도를 분명히 하고 문법을 바로잡으세요. 'I’m not keen on taking photos of buildings' 같은 주제문을 사용하고, 이유와 구체적 예시(예: 가족과 여행 중에 주로 인물 사진을 찍는다)를 한두 문장으로 덧붙이세요. 불필요한 말버릇(예: 'Honestly', 'more specifically I will')을 줄이세요.

Ejemplo: I’m not keen on taking photos of buildings. I usually take pictures of people, like selfies with friends or family when we travel, so I rarely photograph architecture.

Sugerencia: 문장을 더 자연스럽고 정확하게 만드세요. 장소 이름과 이유를 명확하게 연결하고 시제와 전치사를 고치세요. 예: 'I would like to visit the library in Adelaide, Australia, because I will study there and I love libraries'처럼 구성하세요. 추가로 어떤 점이 좋을지(예: 연구 자료, 분위기)를 구체적으로 설명하면 점수가 올라갑니다.

Ejemplo: I would like to visit the library in Adelaide, Australia, because I’m going there to study and I’ve always loved libraries. I’m especially interested in its study spaces and large collection of academic books.

Sugerencia: 생각을 더 조직적으로 표현하세요. 간결한 주제문과 이유(소음 민감성, 개인 정보, 전망 등)를 1~2개의 문장으로 연결하는 연계어를 사용하세요. 반복과 불필요한 채우기 단어('umm', 'so')를 줄이세요.

Ejemplo: No, I wouldn’t like to live in a tall building. Many people live in such buildings, which makes them noisy, and I’m quite sensitive to noise, so I prefer a quieter, low-rise house.

× My hometown is Kadura area so there are no there aren't any tall buildings near my house.

✓ My hometown is the Kadura area, so there aren't any tall buildings near my house.

Mixes two negation forms ('there are no' and 'there aren't') and omits the definite article before a place name. Use one correct 'there be' negative structure ('there aren't any') and include 'the' before 'Kadura area' if referring to a specific area. Suggestion: choose a single negative form and use articles consistently.

× To be honest me it is tall building than my house.

✓ To be honest, it is taller than my house.

The sentence has incorrect word order and comparative form. 'To be honest' should be a fronting phrase, 'me it' is ungrammatical, and the comparative of 'tall' is 'taller' with 'than'. Suggestion: place 'To be honest' at the start, use 'it is taller than my house.'

× Honestly, I'm not very keen on taking buildings.

✓ Honestly, I'm not very keen on photographing buildings.

'Keen on' requires a gerund, but 'taking buildings' is unnatural English; 'photographing' is the correct gerund for taking photos. Suggestion: use 'photographing buildings' or 'taking photos of buildings.'

× I'm more specifically I will.

✓ More specifically, I won't.

The sentence is fragmented and unclear. Context suggests contrast after 'I'm not very keen'; the student likely intended to clarify they will not take photos. 'I will' is incomplete and contradicts previous negative. Suggestion: use a clear contrasting phrase like 'More specifically, I won't' or 'Specifically, I don't.'

× We don't like taking a pictures except taking a selfie, so I don't have any experience ever before.

✓ I don't like taking pictures except selfies, so I don't have any experience taking photos.

Mixes plural/singular with 'a pictures' (should be 'pictures') and uses 'we' inconsistently with personal statement. 'Ever before' is redundant with 'don't have any experience.' Use 'selfies' plural and a clear clause 'experience taking photos.' Suggestion: keep pronouns consistent and remove redundant words.

× Umm, I really want to visit library in the Australia Adelaide because I'm going to study abroad soon there and honestly I've been always loved library.

✓ Umm, I really want to visit the library in Adelaide, Australia, because I'm going to study abroad there soon and I've always loved libraries.

Missing definite article 'the' before 'library' and wrong word order for place name. 'In the Australia Adelaide' is incorrect; use 'in Adelaide, Australia.' 'I've been always loved library' mixes tense and structure; correct is 'I've always loved libraries.' Suggestion: use 'the library' for a specific library, place names in correct order, and 'I've always loved libraries.'

× That's because, umm, in tall buildings.

✓ That's because, umm, in tall buildings many people live here.

Fragmentary sentence; original is incomplete. To fix, integrate with next sentence: 'That's because in tall buildings many people live here.' Note subject-verb structure must be complete. Suggestion: combine fragments to form a full clause.

× Many people live in here.

✓ Many people live here.

Incorrect preposition 'in here' is redundant; use 'live here' or 'live in this building.' Suggestion: remove 'in' when using 'here.'

× Then it'll be quite noisy and I'm very sensitive to noise, so probably I don't like that.

✓ Then it'll be quite noisy and I'm very sensitive to noise, so I probably wouldn't like that.

Modal and tense issue: 'probably I don't like that' is unnatural for hypothetical future conditions. Use conditional 'wouldn't like' to match 'it'll be' context. Also order 'I probably wouldn't like that.' Suggestion: use conditional modal for hypothetical preference.

× So I don't want to live here.

✓ So I don't want to live in a tall building.

Original 'here' is ambiguous; context is about tall buildings. For clarity, repeat 'in a tall building.' Suggestion: make the referent explicit to avoid ambiguity.