Advertisement— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and correct minor grammar errors. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid vague phrases like "decent shopping habits."

Example: Yes — I see advertisements very often when I use my phone or computer. For example, I notice sponsored posts on social media and banner ads on websites, and these are often personalized based on my previous purchases, so they feel tailored to my interests.

Suggestion: Clarify the ad's name and correct grammar. Provide a clear topic sentence, then briefly describe the memorable elements and why it impressed you using linking words (e.g., "because", "so").

Example: Yes — an insurance advertisement for [Company Name] impressed me as a child because it was based on a true story. It used a short drama with emotional scenes, so I remember the characters and the message about helping others.

Suggestion: Make the sentence structure clearer and correct word choice. Use a topic sentence followed by specific examples and a linking phrase to explain why they are effective.

Example: Yes — I often see many advertisements on public transport. For instance, trains and buses display posters, digital screens and full-car wraps for new products and films, which are placed strategically to catch passengers' attention during their commute.

Suggestion: Improve coherence by combining ideas into one or two sentences and fixing punctuation. Use linking words like "however" correctly to contrast preferences.

Example: It depends — I like advertisements that are funny or tell a good story because they entertain me and feel authentic; however, I dislike ads that are too pushy or aggressive since they are off-putting.

Suggestion: Add a clear topic sentence and separate supporting detail with a linking word. Correct run-on sentence and give a brief example to be more specific.

Example: I prefer emotional storytelling ads because they create a strong connection with the audience. For example, advertisements that focus on family values or social causes usually leave a lasting impression on me.

Suggestion: Be concise and correct tense and repetition errors. State the purchase clearly, then explain briefly why the ad persuaded you using a linking word such as "because."

Example: Yes — I bought a new gadget after seeing a convincing social media ad because the video showed how easy and useful it was, so I decided to try it myself.

× Yes, I see advertisements very often whenever I use my phone or computer.

✓ Yes, I see advertisements very often whenever I use my phone or computer.

No grammatical change needed; sentence correctly uses present simple to describe habitual action. Keep as is.

× They appear everywhere on social media platforms, websites or even within apps and I noticed that most of these ads are personalized based on my decent shopping habits.

✓ They appear everywhere on social media platforms, websites or even in apps, and I noticed that most of these ads are personalized based on my recent shopping habits.

Use 'in apps' rather than 'within apps' for natural usage; add comma before conjunction 'and' joining independent clauses. 'Decent shopping habits' is awkward — 'recent' or 'typical' is clearer. Explanation: correct preposition and word choice improve clarity and register.

× Yes, there was a popa tie insurance advertisement that left a lasting impression on me as a child It features a short drama which makes from a true story that mesmerized me a lot.

✓ Yes, there was a Popa Tie insurance advertisement that left a lasting impression on me as a child. It featured a short drama based on a true story that mesmerized me.

Two independent clauses were run together and verb tenses needed consistency: use past tense 'featured' and 'based on' rather than present 'features' and ungrammatical 'which makes from'. Also add period to separate sentences. 'Mesmerized me a lot' is informal; use 'mesmerized me.' Capitalize proper noun 'Popa Tie' if brand.

× Yes, public transport is field advertisements ranging from products to digital screens and I often see as for new products, movies and services on buses and trains that are strategically pressed to capture the attention of passengers

✓ Yes, public transport is full of advertisements ranging from product posters to digital screens, and I often see ads for new products, movies and services on buses and trains that are strategically placed to capture passengers' attention.

Original misuses: 'is field advertisements' incorrect — use 'is full of advertisements'; 'as for' wrong context — use 'ads for'; 'pressed' wrong verb — use 'placed'; possessive 'passengers' attention' needs apostrophe. Corrections fix prepositions, word choice and passive phrasing.

× It depends on the advertisements, I appreciate ads. That are funny or have a good story and I value those ads, that are informative and honest, however I dislike as that are too pushy or aggressive

✓ It depends on the advertisements. I appreciate ads that are funny or have a good story, and I value those that are informative and honest; however, I dislike ads that are too pushy or aggressive.

Run-on and fragmented sentences: separate into correct sentences and combine clauses properly. Replace incorrect fragments ('ads. That are', 'as that are') with relative clauses 'ads that are'. Add appropriate punctuation and conjunctions. Use semicolon or 'however,' with comma for contrast.

× I appreciate emotional storytelling ads as they can create a strong emotional connection these ads often highlight important social issues or values leaving a lasting impression on me.

✓ I appreciate emotional storytelling ads because they can create a strong emotional connection. These ads often highlight important social issues or values, leaving a lasting impression on me.

Run-on sentence: insert conjunction 'because' and split into two sentences or use a comma plus conjunction. Add comma before 'leaving' to mark participle phrase. This improves clarity and sentence flow.

× Yes, I definitely have I remember seeing an ad for a new stick on social media and it looked so fascinating so so I end up buying it.

✓ Yes, I definitely have. I remember seeing an ad for a new stick on social media and it looked so fascinating that I ended up buying it.

Tense and structure errors: separate clauses with punctuation. Use past tense 'ended up' to match 'remember seeing' (past). Insert 'that' to connect clause and remove duplicated 'so'. This corrects past-tense narration and sentence cohesion.