Advertisement— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise, correct grammar, and use linking words to make the answer natural. Begin with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific reason and an example. Avoid redundancy and keep it within 3–4 sentences.

Example: Yes, I see a lot of advertisements on my phone. Because many people now spend hours on social media, companies target mobile apps to reach users quickly. For example, I often notice short video ads on Instagram that introduce new apps or products.

Suggestion: Correct tense and sentence structure, give specific details and finish your idea. Start with a clear topic sentence, then describe the ad briefly (what happened), why it impressed you (specific element), and the effect it had on you.

Example: Yes, one advertisement that stayed with me was an insurance commercial from my childhood. It showed a short drama about a family affected by a sudden accident and used emotional music and close-up shots to create sympathy. Because of its tone and visuals, I remember feeling very moved and thinking about family safety.

Suggestion: Use correct nouns and grammar, add a linking phrase and a specific reason or brief example. Keep it natural and avoid repetition (e.g., 'advertising' not 'advertisings').

Example: Yes, I often see advertising on trains and buses. Because commuters spend a long time traveling, posters and digital ads have a good chance to catch their attention. For instance, I often notice food delivery ads on the subway during rush hour.

Suggestion: Clarify the example and fix grammar. Provide a clear topic sentence, a specific reason, and a short, coherent example showing how an ad helped you decide. Avoid unclear phrases like 'I short online'.

Example: Yes, I do. I find some ads helpful because they highlight a product's key benefits quickly, saving me research time. For example, a short online video ad showed the main features of a portable charger and helped me choose one without reading many reviews.

Suggestion: Make the explanation more fluent and natural, correct minor errors, and add a brief reason why you prefer that style, maybe with an example. Use linking words to connect ideas.

Example: I prefer short drama-style advertisements because a mini-story can hold my attention from beginning to end. For example, a 30-second ad that tells a humorous family moment makes the product memorable and enjoyable to watch.

Suggestion: Correct grammar, give a clear specific example with reason and result. Mention what you bought, why the ad convinced you (e.g., celebrity endorsement, features), and whether you were satisfied. Keep it to 2–3 sentences.

Example: Yes, I recently bought a hair conditioner after seeing an advertisement featuring one of my favorite idols. Because she recommended it and showed her smooth hair, I decided to try it, and it worked well for me.

× I often see advertisement on my phone because this day many people spend their time on the phone by scoring through the social media.

✓ I often see advertisements on my phone because these days many people spend their time on their phones scrolling through social media.

Use plural 'advertisements' to match general countable nouns; 'this day' should be 'these days' for the present habitual time frame; 'on my phone' vs 'on their phones' consistency uses 'their phones' for general statement; 'scoring' is incorrect verb, 'scrolling' is the correct verb for navigating social media.

× When I were a child, I remembered an insurance advertisement.

✓ When I was a child, I remember an insurance advertisement.

Use past tense 'was' with singular first-person subject 'I' (correct form: 'I was'). The original then used 'remembered' which suggests past perfect or different sequence; keeping simple past for time reference requires 'I remember' can be present, but to narrate past better: 'When I was a child, I remember an insurance advertisement.' Alternatively fully past: 'When I was a child, I remembered an insurance advertisement.' Both need 'was'.

× That's why film a short dama, it showed a family facing our sudden accident and impressed me because it used emotional music and little

✓ It was a short film that showed a family facing a sudden accident, and it impressed me because it used emotional music and small details.

Original sentence is run-on and ungrammatical: 'That's why film a short dama' is nonsensical. Reorder to 'It was a short film that showed...' Use 'a sudden accident' instead of 'our sudden accident' unless referring to the speaker's family; end of sentence needs a noun after 'little'—'little' alone is incomplete, so 'small details' fits context.

× Yes, I see a lot of advertisings on trains or other transport.

✓ Yes, I see a lot of advertisements on trains and other forms of transport.

'advertisings' is incorrect; the correct plural is 'advertisements'. Use 'and other forms of transport' or 'other transport' with article variation; 'a lot of' is fine.

× So I think that is a good way to advertise because people have many time to see during commuting

✓ So I think that is a good way to advertise because people have a lot of time to see them while commuting.

'many time' is ungrammatical — use 'a lot of time' or 'much time'; add plural object 'them' (refers to advertisements) and use 'while commuting' for correct time clause.

× For instance, I short online and helped me decide which one is good for me.

✓ For instance, I shopped online and it helped me decide which one was good for me.

'short' is incorrect; likely intended 'shopped' (past tense of 'shop'). Include subject 'it' or 'the ad' to show what helped; maintain past tense consistency 'helped' and 'was good'.

× Personally I like to see short drama advertising because it can draw my attention to see from starting to the end.

✓ Personally, I like to see short drama advertisements because they can draw my attention from the beginning to the end.

Use plural 'advertisements' and 'draw my attention from the beginning to the end' is the correct prepositional phrase. 'to see from starting to the end' is ungrammatical; 'beginning' and 'end' are correct nouns.

× And I think many people love the short story.

✓ And I think many people love short stories.

Use plural 'short stories' for a general statement about types of advertisements; 'the short story' implies a specific one, so change to plural for generalization.

× I recently brought a high conditioner in an advertisement because one of my favorite idols it and I tried that recommendations so it's very interesting.

✓ I recently bought a high-end conditioner because one of my favorite idols recommended it, and I tried that recommendation, so it was very interesting.

Use 'bought' (past tense of 'buy') not 'brought'. 'high conditioner' likely 'high-end conditioner'. 'in an advertisement' -> omit or 'after seeing an advertisement'. 'one of my favorite idols it' is incorrect word order; correct is 'recommended it'. 'that recommendations' should be singular 'that recommendation'. Maintain tense consistency and correct word forms.

× I often see advertisement on my phone because this day many people spend their time on the phone by scoring through the social media.

✓ I often see advertisements on my phone because these days many people spend their time on their phones by scrolling through social media.

In 'many people spend their time', the verb 'spend' matches plural subject 'people' which is correct; however 'scoring' was wrong verb form — 'scrolling' is correct. This item also highlights subject-verb agreement concerns and correct gerund use 'scrolling'.