Bike— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Answer directly in the first sentence by saying yes or no. The response is clear and relevant, but “I got 1” is incorrect; say “I got one.” You could also add one specific detail about how you used the bike, such as where you rode it or who you rode with. Avoid starting with “So,” as it is unnecessary here.

Example: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. I got one as a birthday present when I was ten years old. I often rode it around my neighborhood with my friends, so I really enjoyed having it.

Suggestion: The answer gives relevant reasons, but the sentence is too long and difficult to follow. Divide it into three shorter sentences and use clear linking words such as “Additionally” or “Nowadays.” Replace “one of the items that parents love to give to their children in childhood” with the more natural phrase “a popular gift for children.” Explain the fuel-related reason accurately by saying that rising fuel prices encourage delivery companies to use bikes. Remove fillers such as “umm” and “what about,” and include a specific example if possible.

Example: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country. They are often given to children as birthday presents, and many people use them for exercise or short trips. Nowadays, rising fuel prices have also encouraged delivery companies to use bikes because they are cheaper to operate than cars or motorcycles.

× I got 1 as a birthday gift when I was 10 years old.

✓ I got it as a birthday gift when I was 10 years old.

The object pronoun it is needed to refer back to the bike. The word 1 is not an appropriate pronoun in this sentence. Use it when referring to a singular object that has already been mentioned.

× Bikes are quite popular in my country because it is one of the items that parents love to give to their children in childhood and then it is also popular these days because of the umm what about expensive fuel is so delivery companies are switching to using bikes for deliveries.

✓ Bikes are quite popular in my country because they are one of the items that parents love to give to their children during childhood, and they are also popular these days because expensive fuel costs are causing delivery companies to switch to bikes for deliveries.

The subject bikes is plural, so it should be referred to with they, not it. Make sure that pronouns agree in number with the nouns they replace: use they for plural nouns and it for singular nouns.

× Bikes are quite popular in my country because it is one of the items that parents love to give to their children in childhood and then it is also popular these days because of the umm what about expensive fuel is so delivery companies are switching to using bikes for deliveries.

✓ Bikes are quite popular in my country because they are one of the items that parents love to give to their children during childhood. They are also popular these days because expensive fuel costs are causing delivery companies to switch to bikes for deliveries.

The original sentence contains several ideas joined together without a clear structure. The phrase what about expensive fuel is so is incomplete and makes the cause-and-effect relationship unclear. Divide the ideas into two sentences and use because to introduce the reason clearly. Avoid fillers such as umm and what about in a prepared answer.