Bike— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Improve by giving a clearer topic sentence and adding one or two specific supporting details (when, who, a short memory) with a linking word. Keep responses concise (max 5 sentences). Also vary vocabulary (e.g., ‘cycling’ instead of repeating ‘ride’).

Example: Yes — I had a small red bike when I was about seven. I usually rode it with my younger sister to the nearby park most afternoons, and we would race along the path until dinner. It was my favourite way to spend time outdoors.

Suggestion: Make a direct general statement first, then support it with specific observations, using linking words and avoiding fillers like ‘like’. Be more precise about scale or examples (e.g., where, who, why). Use varied vocabulary (e.g., ‘common’, ‘popular’, ‘cyclists’).

Example: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my city. For example, when I cycle to the park in Manchester I often see families and commuters using bicycles, especially on weekends, which suggests cycling is widespread and growing in popularity.

× We used to ride it every day to the park.

✓ We used to ride it to the park every day.

The original sentence is grammatically acceptable but the placement of the adverbial phrase 'every day' is slightly awkward. This is an adverb placement issue related to verb + -ing context; moving 'every day' to the end of the clause improves natural word order and clarity. Suggestion: place frequency adverbs after the main verb or at the end of the clause for smoother flow.

× Yeah, I live in Manchester, so when I go to the park with my friends and ride the bike, we always see like other kids riding their bikes.

✓ Yeah, I live in Manchester, so when I go to the park with my friends and ride my bike, we always see other kids riding their bikes.

This sentence has several issues: use of 'like' as a filler (colloquial and unnecessary) and a pronoun reference for the bicycle. The phrase 'ride the bike' is awkward because it implies a specific shared bike; 'ride my bike' matches the earlier context. Also 'like' is informal and not needed. The participle phrase 'riding their bikes' is correct. Suggestion: replace 'ride the bike' with 'ride my bike' and remove 'like' to improve grammaticality and clarity.