Bike— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be concise, correct grammar, and avoid fillers. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct tense and possessive errors (e.g., "bought for me", "I cycled").

Example: Yes, I did. My father bought me a beautiful pink bicycle when I was nine, and I cycled on it for almost four years. It was very reliable and helped me feel more independent, especially when I rode to school and the park.

Suggestion: Give a direct answer then support it with specific reasons and a linking word. Avoid repetition and fillers. Expand slightly with an example or brief comparison to show depth.

Example: No, I don't think bikes are very popular. This is mainly because many people prefer private cars or motorbikes for convenience and status. As a result, cycling is uncommon except in a few parks or among students.

× Actually, yes, I had a beautiful pink, uh, bicycle that my father bought it for me when I was nine years old and I cycle with that for almost 4 years and it was so good for my.

✓ Actually, yes, I had a beautiful pink bicycle that my father bought for me when I was nine years old, and I cycled with it for almost four years; it was very good to me.

Problems: (1) Redundant pronoun 'it' after 'bought' (use 'bought for me' or 'bought me a bicycle'); (2) Present tense 'cycle' should be past 'cycled' to match 'had' and 'was nine'; (3) Use 'it' as the object when referring back to 'bicycle' (not 'that'); (4) 'for my' is incorrect; change to 'to me' or 'for me'; (5) Spell out numbers in formal writing (optional). Suggestion: Remove the extra pronoun, make verbs consistent in past tense, and use correct object pronouns: 'my father bought for me', 'I cycled with it', 'it was very good to me.'

× Unfortunately no, because, uh, people in my country prefer to go everywhere with their own vehicles, so no.

✓ Unfortunately, no, because people in my country prefer to go everywhere by their own vehicles.

Problems: (1) 'so no' is informal and unnecessary; (2) 'with their own vehicles' is acceptable but 'by their own vehicles' or better 'using their own vehicles' is more natural; (3) Maintain present tense 'prefer' correctly but remove filler 'uh' and redundant 'so no.' Suggestion: Use 'Unfortunately, no, because people in my country prefer to go everywhere using their own vehicles.'