Tiredness— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid repetition and fix tense and word choice errors (e.g. “the night before,” “concentrated on my tasks,” remove stray words like “Stay and even those off in the courses”).

Example: I sometimes feel tired. It mainly depends on my sleep quality: if I sleep well the night before, I feel refreshed and can concentrate on my tasks; but if I don’t get enough sleep, I become very tired during the day.

Suggestion: Organize into a clear topic sentence followed by specific reasons and actions. Use correct grammar and linking words (for example, “because,” “so,” “therefore”). Avoid vague phrases and fix awkward constructions (e.g. “drink a cup of tea,” “do some movement,” “when I’m too tired”).

Example: I usually feel most tired in the afternoon, especially after lunch, because blood sugar rises and causes drowsiness. To cope, I often drink a cup of tea and do some light stretching, but if I’m very tired I’ll take a short nap to refresh myself.

Suggestion: Give a concise topic sentence and then two or three clear, specific strategies with correct phrasing. Avoid redundancy and incorrect verb forms (e.g. “re-energize,” “stand up and move,” “hard to bear it”). Use linking words like “or” and “if.”

Example: When I feel tired, I usually drink tea or coffee to re-energize and stand up to stretch so I can refocus. If I’m extremely tired, I take a short nap, which helps me feel refreshed and more productive afterwards.

Suggestion: Start with a clear direct answer (yes/no/it depends) then explain with one or two specific reasons. Fix grammar and vocabulary (e.g. “if it was my best friend,” “build my relationship,” “share my feelings about work,” “ask to change the date/time”). Avoid long, repetitive sentences.

Example: It depends. If my best friend invited me, I would probably go because it’s important for us to connect and I might feel better after talking. But if it’s an acquaintance, I would suggest changing the date or time to when I have more energy.

× Sometimes, because it depends on my sleep quality, if that day I had a very good sleep at the before night, I would feel very refreshed and concentrated on my text very easily in the next day.

✓ Sometimes it depends on my sleep quality; if I had a very good sleep the night before, I would feel very refreshed and be able to concentrate on my tasks easily the next day.

The sentence mixes tenses and uses incorrect time expressions. Use 'the night before' rather than 'the before night'. Conditional with 'if I had' and result 'I would feel' is acceptable for hypothetical past conditions, but 'concentrated on my text' is awkward; use 'concentrate on my tasks'. Also use 'next day' -> 'the next day'. Ensure parallel structure: 'feel refreshed and be able to concentrate'. (Grammar problem type ID:6)

× However, if I have a bad sleep quality or do not have adequate sleep, I would feel very tired.

✓ However, if I have poor sleep quality or do not get adequate sleep, I feel very tired.

Mixes conditional/modal 'would' with present-tense condition. For habitual present conditions use present simple in both clauses: 'if I have... I feel...' Also 'bad sleep quality' -> 'poor sleep quality' and 'do not have adequate sleep' -> 'do not get adequate sleep'. (Grammar problem type ID:6)

× Stay and even those off in the courses.

✓ I may even fall asleep during classes.

The original is fragmented and unclear. 'Stay and even those off in the courses' lacks a verb and subject. Use complete sentence with clear subject and verb: 'I may even fall asleep during classes.' This fixes sentence structure and meaning. (Grammar problem type ID:26)

× Mostly I feel very tired in the afternoon, especially the time that I just finished my lunch.

✓ I mostly feel very tired in the afternoon, especially right after I finish lunch.

Use present simple for habitual actions: 'I mostly feel' and 'after I finish lunch' rather than 'the time that I just finished my lunch'. Make word order natural: 'right after I finish lunch'. (Grammar problem type ID:6)

× Since the glucose will rise in our blood, it makes people very tired after eating a lunch that contains very much calories.

✓ Since blood glucose rises after eating, people often feel tired after a high-calorie lunch.

Avoid awkward pronouns and phrasing: 'glucose will rise in our blood' is better as 'blood glucose rises'. 'It makes people very tired' -> 'people often feel tired'. 'A lunch that contains very much calories' -> 'a high-calorie lunch'. Also use general present tense for general truths. (Grammar problem type ID:12)

× And at that time I usually drink cup of tea or make myself.

✓ At that time I usually drink a cup of tea or move around a bit to wake myself up.

Missing article: 'a cup of tea'. 'Make myself' is incomplete; specify action 'wake myself up' or 'move around'. Ensure clarity and correct article usage. (Grammar problem type ID:22)

× Having some movement in order to keep myself refreshed and can keep concentrating on my work.

✓ I do some light exercise to keep myself refreshed and maintain concentration on my work.

Fragment lacking main verb and uses gerund phrase awkwardly. Use full clause with subject and verb: 'I do some light exercise'. 'Can keep concentrating' -> 'maintain concentration'. (Grammar problem type ID:8)

× However, sometimes when it's too tired I would take a nap to refresh myself.

✓ However, sometimes when I am too tired I take a nap to refresh myself.

Incorrect pronoun 'it' should be 'I'. Use present simple for habitual action: 'I take a nap' rather than 'I would take a nap'. (Grammar problem type ID:6)

× When I feel very tired, I always drink a cup of tea or coffee to make myself reenergize, or I can stand up and make some movement in order to make myself keep in the situation that I can't concentrate.

✓ When I feel very tired, I always drink a cup of tea or coffee to reenergize, or I stand up and move around to help myself concentrate.

'Make myself reenergize' is incorrect; use 'reenergize' as intransitive or 're-energize myself'. 'Make some movement' -> 'move around'. 'Make myself keep in the situation that I can't concentrate' is awkward; use 'to help myself concentrate'. Use consistent verb forms for habits. (Grammar problem type ID:13)

× However, if sometimes I feel really tired and hardly to bear it, I would let myself to take a nap, because after taking the nap.

✓ However, if I sometimes feel really tired and can hardly bear it, I let myself take a nap because after a nap I feel much refreshed.

Several errors: word order 'hardly to bear it' should be 'can hardly bear it'. 'Let myself to take a nap' -> 'let myself take a nap' (no 'to'). Sentence fragment 'because after taking the nap.' needs completion: 'because after a nap I feel much refreshed.' Fix sentence structure and verb forms. (Grammar problem type ID:26)

× It will re energize me a lot and can keep my work very concentrated after that day.

✓ It will reenergize me a lot and help me stay focused on my work after that.

'Can keep my work very concentrated' is incorrect: 'work' cannot be 'concentrated'; a person can be focused. Use 'help me stay focused on my work'. Also 'after that day' is unnecessary and unnatural; use 'after that'. (Grammar problem type ID:12)

× Well it depends on the closeness of our relationship.

✓ Well, it depends on how close we are as friends.

Original is understandable but 'closeness of our relationship' is wordy; 'how close we are as friends' is more natural. No major grammar error but improved pronoun and phrasing. (Grammar problem type ID:12)

× If the IT was my best friend ask asking me out when I was very tired, I would definitely go because it was a good chance for me to build relationship with her and also share my emotions and thought to work.

✓ If it was my best friend asking me out when I was very tired, I would definitely go because it would be a good chance to strengthen our relationship and share my feelings and thoughts about work.

Multiple issues: 'IT' should be 'it' and redundant words 'ask asking'. Use 'asking me out'. Maintain conditional tense consistency: 'If it was... I would...' Also 'build relationship with her' -> 'strengthen our relationship' and 'share my emotions and thought to work' -> 'share my feelings and thoughts about work'. Fix pronouns and noun phrases. (Grammar problem type ID:12)

× However, when it was just a general friend ask me out, I would ask them to.

✓ However, when it is just a casual friend asking me out, I would ask them to change the date or time.

Tense inconsistency: use present simple for habitual situations: 'when it is just a casual friend asking me out'. 'I would ask them to.' is incomplete; specify 'to change the date or time'. Also 'general friend' -> 'casual friend'. (Grammar problem type ID:9)

× If there is a chance to change a date or change a time that I have more energy to go out with them and I will be happy to go out with them at that time.

✓ If there is a chance to change the date or time so that I have more energy, I will be happy to go out with them then.

Sentence is run-on and wordy. Use 'so that' to show purpose/result and simplify: 'change the date or time so that I have more energy' and 'I will be happy to go out with them then.' This corrects sentence structure and clarity. (Grammar problem type ID:26)