Tiredness— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and use correct tense and variety in vocabulary. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct tense (use present simple for routine), and add one specific reason with a linking word. Avoid filler words like "yeah" and "a lot of stuff."

Example: Yes, I often feel tired because I work long hours as a graphic designer and then attend evening English classes. For example, after a full day at work I still commute to class, which leaves me with little time to relax.

Suggestion: Use correct sentence structure and verb forms and provide a clearer, slightly longer explanation. Begin with a direct topic sentence, then add a specific detail and a linking word (e.g., "because" or "so"). Avoid repetition like "normally" and "often."

Example: I usually feel tired after work because my job as a graphic designer requires intense creative thinking. For instance, I often spend hours brainstorming and refining concepts, which is mentally draining.

Suggestion: Organize the answer into a clear topic sentence and two concise supporting points with linking words. Reduce hesitations (umm) and use precise vocabulary (e.g., "go for a walk in the park", "rest/sleep"). Give one brief example of when or how these help you.

Example: When I'm tired, I usually go for a short walk in the park to enjoy the greenery and clear my mind, and sometimes I take a short nap to recover. For example, a 20-minute walk after work helps reduce my stress and improves my focus.

× Yeah, of course, I often feel tired because I do a lot of stuff every day, especially going to work.

✓ Yeah, of course, I often feel tired because I do a lot of things every day, especially when I go to work.

Use 'things' not the informal uncountable 'stuff' for clarity (quantifier/word choice). Also 'going to work' should be 'when I go to work' to form a complete time clause; this keeps consistent present simple tense and correct sentence structure.

× Also, after that I went to study English at the end of the day as well.

✓ Also, after that I study English at the end of the day as well.

The context uses habitual present (you 'often feel tired'), so 'went' (past) is inconsistent. Use present simple 'study' for habitual action. This fixes tense agreement.

× Normally I often feel tired after I'm working, mostly because I work as a graphic designer and I had to thinks a lot to generate my creative idea and put into it.

✓ Normally I often feel tired after I finish work, mostly because I work as a graphic designer and I have to think a lot to generate creative ideas and put them into practice.

'After I'm working' is incorrect for sequence; use 'after I finish work' or 'after work' for a completed action. 'Had to' (past) should be 'have to' to match present habitual context. 'Thinks' is wrong form; use the base verb 'think'. 'Creative idea' should be plural 'creative ideas' for generality, and 'put into it' is vague — 'put them into practice' is idiomatic.

× Umm normally when I feel tired I go for a walk sometime, go to the parks to see the greenery and scenery of the place and also umm sleep.

✓ Umm normally when I feel tired I go for a walk sometimes, go to the park to see the greenery and scenery, and also sleep.

Use adverb 'sometimes' not 'sometime' to mean 'occasionally'. 'Parks' should be singular 'park' when speaking generally about going to a park. Parallel structure: use commas and 'and' before the final item. This corrects adverb placement and noun number.

× Sleep is the best medicine for me to just recover from every tiredness and also umm from stress.

✓ Sleep is the best medicine for me to recover from tiredness and from stress.

'Recover from every tiredness' is unnatural; use 'recover from tiredness'. The word 'just' is unnecessary and weakens the sentence. This corrects word choice and idiomatic expression. (Classified as reflexive/pronoun-related category since phrasing implied misuse of 'for me to just recover'—improvement focuses on clarity.)