Tiredness— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and natural: start with a direct topic sentence, then give a brief reason or example. Avoid unnecessary words like “especially” twice and phrasing that sounds slightly awkward (e.g. “in my spare time” then “especially on weekends” could be combined). Use linking words if you add details.

Example: Yes, I get tired about once or twice a week. Usually it happens during my free time, particularly at the end of the week when I’ve been busy, so I rest to recover.

Suggestion: Open with a clear topic sentence and avoid repetition. Use a linking word to connect causes and times, and be specific about what makes your schedule busy. Correct grammar (e.g. “sometimes”) and prefer present simple for habits.

Example: I usually feel tired at home during my free time, especially on weekends, because I often work long hours during the week. For example, I sometimes finish late shifts or study into the evening, which leaves me exhausted.

Suggestion: Give a clear topic sentence listing one or two main activities, then support with concise reasons and avoid filler sounds like “uh.” Use correct verb forms (e.g. “cook” → “cook” or “do some cooking”) and avoid contradictory adjectives (don’t say both “tired” and “energetic” without clarification). Limit to max 3–4 short sentences.

Example: I usually cook or watch movies with my family when I’m tired because these activities help me relax. For instance, cooking is calming and lets me focus on simple tasks, while watching a film helps us unwind and spend quality time together.

× I often feel tired once or twice a week, especially in my spare time.

✓ I often feel tired once or twice a week, especially in my spare time.

No correction needed. The sentence correctly uses the present simple to describe habitual frequency. Keep as is.

× As I mentioned earlier, I would feel tired at my home in my free time, especially on weekends.

✓ As I mentioned earlier, I often feel tired at home in my free time, especially on weekends.

The modal 'would' is inappropriate when describing habitual present actions. Use the present simple 'often feel' to match the context and previous question about typical experiences. Also, 'at my home' is more natural as 'at home.'

× Sometime I feel tired because of my busy schedule.

✓ Sometimes I feel tired because of my busy schedule.

The adverb should be 'sometimes' (plural form) to indicate occasional frequency. 'Sometime' means 'at an unspecified time' and is incorrect here. Add the plural 's' to correct frequency expression.

× I usually do cook or watch movies with my family because uh, it helps me relax and I feel very comfortable, energetic and I have spent some quality time with my family.

✓ I usually cook or watch movies with my family because it helps me relax; I feel comfortable and energetic, and I get to spend quality time with my family.

Several issues: remove the unnecessary auxiliary 'do' before 'cook' when forming a simple present habitual action. Replace the filler 'uh' and change 'it helps me relax and I feel very comfortable, energetic and I have spent some quality time' to clearer coordinated clauses: use present simple 'helps' and 'feel' for current general effects. 'I have spent' is present perfect and implies a completed action; use 'I get to spend' or 'I spend' to express habitual occurrence. Also improve word order and punctuation for clarity.