Politeness— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: 답변 구조는 괜찮지만 문법 오류와 표현의 자연스러움을 개선해야 합니다. 먼저 주제 문장으로 시작한 것은 좋으나 두 번째 문장에서 시제와 어순이 부자연스럽습니다("When I didn't see someone so I didn't bow to them"는 의미가 불분명). 또한 연결어를 사용해 이유와 결과를 명확히 설명하면 더 논리적입니다. 구체적으로 부모님이 어떤 방식으로 가르쳤는지(예: 반복적으로 교정, 역할극, 칭찬 등)를 한두 문장으로 덧붙여 주세요. 문장 수는 3~4문장으로 유지하고 단어 선택은 간단하고 정확한 표현을 사용하세요.

Example: I learned to be polite from my parents. Whenever I forgot to bow or greet someone, they would gently correct me and explain why it was important. Because of their reminders and examples, politeness became a habit for me.

Suggestion: 의견은 분명하지만 표현이 어색하고 문장이 완결되지 않았습니다("we can."에서 문장이 끊김). 이유와 결과를 연결할 때 연결어를 사용하고, 구체적인 예나 결과를 덧붙이면 설득력이 높아집니다. 예를 들어 polite가 관계에 어떤 긍정적 영향을 미치는지(신뢰 형성, 충돌 감소 등)를 구체적으로 설명하세요. 문장은 2~4개로 유지하고 불완전한 문장은 완성하세요.

Example: Yes, I believe politeness is very important because it shows respect for others. When you are polite, people are more likely to trust you and listen to your ideas. For instance, polite behaviour can help prevent misunderstandings and make it easier to resolve conflicts.

× When I was a child, I learned how to be polite from my mom and dad.

✓ When I was a child, I learned to be polite from my mom and dad.

The original sentence is grammatical but 'learned to be polite' is more natural than 'learned how to be polite.' Use the infinitive 'to be' after 'learned' to express acquiring a behavior; it's a stylistic improvement rather than a strict grammar fix.

× When I didn't see someone so I didn't bow to them, they always told me what I missed.

✓ If I didn't see someone and therefore didn't bow to them, my parents always told me what I had missed.

The original has a faulty cause-effect structure and tense inconsistency. Replace 'When I didn't see someone so I didn't bow' with a conditional or causal clause: 'If I didn't see someone and therefore didn't bow.' Also use past perfect 'had missed' to show the action occurred before the parents told the speaker. This corrects sentence structure and clarifies sequence of events.

× In that way, I learned how to be polite.

✓ In that way, I learned to be polite.

Again, 'learned to be polite' is more natural than 'learned how to be polite.' This is a minor stylistic sentence structure improvement to make the expression more idiomatic.

× Being polite means that you are respecting someone, so it's very important in relationships.

✓ Being polite means that you respect someone, so it's very important in relationships.

After 'means that' use the simple present 'you respect' rather than the progressive 'you are respecting.' The progressive implies an ongoing action at a specific moment; the simple present states a general truth or characteristic, which is appropriate here.

× As showing your respect to someone, they can open their mind to me and we can.

✓ By showing respect to someone, they may be more open-minded toward me, and we can communicate better.

Original has incorrect clause structure and an incomplete final clause ('we can' what?). Use 'By showing respect' to indicate the method, change 'they can open their mind to me' to 'they may be more open-minded toward me' for natural phrasing, and complete the final idea with 'we can communicate better.' This fixes sentence structure and completes the thought.