Paper— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: 질문에 직접 답한 점은 좋지만, ‘didn't make ... that much’, ‘a like’, ‘an art class in art’는 부자연스럽거나 불필요하게 반복됩니다. ‘I didn’t make many paper crafts’처럼 표현하고, 어떤 공예를 만들었는지와 그 이유를 한두 문장으로 구체적으로 설명하세요. 또한 문장을 2~3개로 나누어 더 명확하게 말하는 것이 좋습니다.

Example: I didn’t make many paper crafts, but I made a few in my high school art class. For example, I made paper flowers and simple origami animals. It was a fun way to be creative.

Suggestion: ‘enjoyed to fold’는 ‘enjoyed folding’으로 고쳐야 하며, ‘bird and animals’는 ‘birds and animals’가 자연스럽습니다. 답변이 ‘because it made’에서 끝나 의미가 완성되지 않았으므로 완전한 문장으로 마무리하세요. 좋아했던 활동을 먼저 말하고, 구체적인 예와 재미있었던 이유를 연결어로 설명하면 좋습니다.

Example: When I was a child, I enjoyed folding paper into birds and animals. I often made simple origami figures at school and showed them to my friends. It was fun because I could create something with just a single sheet of paper.

Suggestion: 주요 답변과 이유, 예시를 모두 포함해 내용은 좋습니다. 다만 ‘write some’은 ‘write one’ 또는 ‘write a letter’로 구체화하고, ‘but’와 ‘for example’ 앞에 문장 구분이나 쉼표를 사용하세요. ‘when it’s my friend’s birthday’처럼 소유격과 문장 구조를 정확하게 만들면 더 자연스럽습니다.

Example: I don’t really write physical letters anymore because I usually send messages or emails. However, I occasionally write a letter for a special occasion, such as a friend’s birthday. It feels more personal than sending a quick text.

Suggestion: 의견과 이유를 제시한 점은 좋지만, ‘many people’이 반복되고 ‘the technology has developed’는 이 문맥에서 ‘technology has advanced’가 더 자연스럽습니다. ‘Instagram’은 일반적으로 단수 고유명사로 쓰며, 질문이 ‘keep’에 관한 것이므로 사람들이 편지를 보관하는지까지 직접 언급하세요. 대조 연결어를 사용해 예외나 개인적인 관점도 덧붙이면 답변이 더 효과적입니다.

Example: I think fewer people keep handwritten letters today because technology has advanced. Most people prefer using social media platforms such as Instagram or Messenger, and digital messages are easier to store. However, some people still keep old letters because they have sentimental value.

Suggestion: ‘It depends’로 상황을 나누어 답한 구조는 적절합니다. 하지만 ‘usually’가 반복되고, 일반적인 의미에서는 ‘papers and pens’보다 ‘paper and a pen’ 또는 ‘some paper and pens’가 자연스럽습니다. 친구를 만날 때와 공부하러 갈 때의 차이를 정확한 문장과 이유로 설명하면 더 높은 점수를 받을 수 있습니다.

Example: It depends on where I’m going. If I’m just meeting my friends, I usually leave them at home. However, when I go to study, I always carry some paper and a couple of pens in my bag because I like taking notes by hand.

× I didn't make any crafts with paper that much.

✓ I didn't make paper crafts very often.

That much is not the natural adverbial expression for frequency in this sentence. Use very often to describe how frequently you made paper crafts.

× Particularly I made some paper crafts when I was a high school student because I had a like art class in art.

✓ I particularly made some paper crafts when I was a high school student because I had an art class.

The adverb particularly is more naturally placed after the subject and before the main verb. The phrase a like art class in art is also structurally incorrect; use an art class instead.

× Particularly I made some paper crafts when I was a high school student because I had a like art class in art.

✓ I particularly made some paper crafts when I was a high school student because I had an art class.

Art is a singular countable noun in this context, so it needs the article an. The phrase a like art class is incorrect and should be replaced with an art class.

× I enjoyed to fold the paper to make some shapes such as bird and animals when I was in elementary school it was really fun because it made

✓ I enjoyed folding paper to make shapes such as birds and animals when I was in elementary school. It was really fun.

After enjoy, use a gerund with the -ing form, so enjoyed folding is correct, not enjoyed to fold.

× I enjoyed to fold the paper to make some shapes such as bird and animals when I was in elementary school it was really fun because it made

✓ I enjoyed folding paper to make shapes such as birds and animals when I was in elementary school. It was really fun.

The nouns refer to more than one shape, bird, and animal, so they should be plural: shapes, birds, and animals.

× I enjoyed to fold the paper to make some shapes such as bird and animals when I was in elementary school it was really fun because it made

✓ I enjoyed folding paper to make shapes such as birds and animals when I was in elementary school. It was really fun.

The original sentence joins several clauses without appropriate punctuation and ends with the incomplete phrase because it made. Divide the ideas into two complete sentences.

× Well, I don't really write physical letters anymore because I usually send messages or emails but occasionally I write some for example when my friend's birthday I write letters.

✓ Well, I don't really write physical letters anymore because I usually send messages or emails, but occasionally I write some. For example, I write letters on my friend's birthday.

Use on with a specific day or date, so on my friend's birthday is correct. The original phrase when my friend's birthday is missing the preposition on.

× Well, I don't really write physical letters anymore because I usually send messages or emails but occasionally I write some for example when my friend's birthday I write letters.

✓ Well, I don't really write physical letters anymore because I usually send messages or emails, but occasionally I write some. For example, I write letters on my friend's birthday.

The original sentence contains several independent ideas connected without sufficient punctuation. Use a comma before but and separate the example into a new sentence.

× I think many people don't write handwritten letters today because the technology has developed so many people many people prefer using social media such as Instagrams or Messenger.

✓ I think many people don't write handwritten letters today because technology has developed, so many people prefer using social media such as Instagram or Messenger.

Because and so should not be combined in the original structure without clear clause separation. Here, because introduces the reason and so connects the result; a comma is needed before so.

× I think many people don't write handwritten letters today because the technology has developed so many people many people prefer using social media such as Instagrams or Messenger.

✓ I think many people don't write handwritten letters today because technology has developed, so many people prefer using social media such as Instagram or Messenger.

Instagram is the name of one social media platform and is normally used as a singular proper noun without a plural -s. Messenger is also a proper name.

× It depends. When I want to hang out with my friends I don't really carry papers and pens, but when I go to study I usually usually carry my paper and pens in my bag

✓ It depends. When I want to hang out with my friends, I don't really carry paper and pens, but when I go out to study, I usually carry paper and pens in my bag.

Paper is generally an uncountable noun when referring to the material, so use paper rather than papers in this context. Pens remains plural because the speaker may carry more than one pen.

× It depends. When I want to hang out with my friends I don't really carry papers and pens, but when I go to study I usually usually carry my paper and pens in my bag

✓ It depends. When I want to hang out with my friends, I don't really carry paper and pens, but when I go out to study, I usually carry paper and pens in my bag.

Use commas after the introductory when-clauses. Also, usually was repeated accidentally; it should appear only once.