Parks— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more grammatical, concise and coherent. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add 1–2 specific supporting details using linking words. Correct tense and subject-verb agreement, and avoid repetition.

Example: Yes. I loved going to parks as a child. For example, my father took me every weekend, and on Saturdays we would swing on the playground and go jogging together. Those visits are some of my happiest childhood memories.

Suggestion: Give a concise direct answer then add specific details linked clearly. Reduce hesitations and filler words. Use consistent verb tenses and smoother linking words (however, although, because).

Example: Yes, I still enjoy parks. Although I am busy during the week, I go to the park every Sunday morning for jogging and yoga because there is a friendly community that holds classes there.

Suggestion: Answer directly then give two clear, specific reasons using linking words. Avoid vague phrases and improve word choice (greener, leisure time, spend time with children).

Example: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because they would make the area greener and provide safe places for families. For instance, parents could take their children to play while others relax or exercise, improving community wellbeing.

Suggestion: Provide a clear topic sentence naming the park, then give 2–3 specific details about it (size, activities, who you will go with) using linking words. Remove fillers and redundancy.

Example: Yes, I would like to visit the large park in Bahia Town. It has many facilities such as walking trails, playgrounds and picnic areas, so I plan to go there with my family to enjoy a day of outdoor activities.

× Yes, obviously as a child who do not love to go to park and when I was a child I really like enjoy going to parks.

✓ Yes, obviously as a child who did not love to go to parks is incorrect; correct: 'Yes, obviously as a child who did not love to go to parks' should be rewritten more naturally as: 'Yes, obviously as a child I loved going to parks.'

The original mixes relative clause and wrong pronoun/verb forms. 'Who do not love' is ungrammatical for referring to 'a child' and uses present tense instead of past. It's clearer to use a simple subject 'I' with past tense 'loved'. Suggestion: avoid awkward relative clause and use correct past tense for childhood habits.

× My father took me to park every weekend and I remember on Saturday we used to go on parks and I swing and we do jogging.

✓ My father took me to the park every weekend, and I remember that on Saturdays we used to go to parks; I would swing and we would go jogging.

Multiple tense and preposition errors: 'took me to park' needs the definite article 'the park'. 'On Saturday' should be plural 'on Saturdays' for habitual past. 'Used to go on parks' should be 'go to parks'. 'I swing' and 'we do jogging' mix present and wrong noun/verb forms; in past habitual use 'I would swing' or 'I swung' and 'we would go jogging' or 'we went jogging'. Use consistent past habitual forms.

× We really.

✓ We really did.

Fragment: 'We really.' is incomplete and lacks a verb. Adding 'did' completes the idea (e.g., 'We really did'). Ensure sentences have a verb to express a complete thought.

× I would say, uh, yes, uh, but really, I don't have time right now to go to parks, but every weekend Sunday morning I go to park for jogging and yoga.

✓ I would say yes, but I don't have time right now to go to parks. However, every Sunday morning I go to the park for jogging and yoga.

Tense mostly fine, but article and word order errors: 'every weekend Sunday morning' is redundant/awkward; choose 'every Sunday morning'. 'Go to park' requires 'the park' or 'parks' depending on meaning; use 'the park' for a specific place. Also split into two sentences for clarity.

× There's a community there and, uh, they come for the classes and I really enjoy going there.

✓ There is a community there, and they come for classes; I really enjoy going there.

Contraction 'There's' is acceptable but keep consistent: 'for the classes' -> 'for classes' is more natural. Otherwise sentence is fine. Removed filler 'uh' and tightened structure.

× I would say yes I would like to see more parks in my city because they are more greener and they will help people to go and spend time actually leisure times over there and bring their kids to their and have enjoyment me time over there.

✓ I would say yes; I would like to see more parks in my city because they are greener and they would help people spend leisure time there, bring their kids, and enjoy some time for themselves.

Multiple issues: 'more greener' is incorrect comparative (use 'greener' not 'more greener'). 'They will help people to go and spend time actually leisure times' is awkward—use 'help people spend leisure time'. 'Bring their kids to their' has wrong pronoun; use 'bring their kids there'. 'Have enjoyment me time' is ungrammatical; use 'enjoy some time for themselves'. Tense/modal consistency: 'would like' aligns with conditional 'would help' or 'will help'—'would' fits better with 'would like'.

× Yes, there are list of parks where I want to go, but I will talk about one in our city.

✓ Yes, there is a list of parks I want to visit, but I will talk about one in our city.

'There are list of parks' is wrong; use 'there is a list' (singular 'list') or 'there are a number of parks'. Also 'want to go' is acceptable but 'want to visit' is more natural. Ensure subject and verb agree and choose correct quantifier.

× There is a park in Bahia town which is very, uh, large and big.

✓ There is a park in Bahia Town which is very large.

'Large and big' is redundant; choose one adjective. Capitalize proper noun 'Bahia Town'. Remove filler 'uh'.

× Many activities are there and I will go with my family and have the time of enjoyment.

✓ There are many activities, and I will go with my family and have an enjoyable time.

Word order: 'Many activities are there' is awkward—use 'There are many activities'. 'Have the time of enjoyment' is unnatural; use 'have an enjoyable time' or 'have a great time'. Adjust article 'an'.