Parks— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and avoid repetition; include one clear topic sentence then one or two specific supporting details. Use linking words (for example, "because" or "and") and correct minor grammar errors (e.g., remove duplicated words, use past tense consistently).

Example: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child because my parents often took me there and I played on swings and slides with my friends. As a result, I have fond memories of picnics and games that made childhood weekends special.

Suggestion: Keep the answer natural and correct grammar (e.g., "refreshment" -> "refreshing," "boost" -> "boosts"). Limit to one topic sentence plus two supporting reasons with linking words like "because" and "and" to improve coherence.

Example: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they are refreshing and help me relieve stress. For example, a short walk among trees usually boosts my mood and clears my mind, so I visit regularly.

Suggestion: Answer the question directly and fully. Clarify the city name or say "in my city," avoid fillers (uh) and incomplete sentences. State a clear opinion and one specific reason using a linking word like "because."

Example: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because additional green spaces would give residents more places to exercise and relax. For instance, more parks near apartment areas would make it easier for families to spend time outdoors.

Suggestion: Be concise and correct grammar (e.g., "one of the biggest parks," "because I want to paint the trees"). Remove fillers and avoid tense inconsistency. Give one clear reason and a short supporting detail to sound natural and effective.

Example: Yes, I want to visit Cuban Park because it is one of the largest parks in the city and has many interesting trees. I plan to go there to sketch and paint the trees since they are very special to me.

× My parents often took me there and I I used to play with my friends on swings and slides I had.

✓ My parents often took me there, and I used to play with my friends on the swings and slides.

The sentence has repetition ('I I'), missing articles, and a misplaced clause ('I had') causing broken structure. Combine clauses with a comma and 'and', remove the duplicate 'I', add the definite article 'the' before 'swings and slides', and remove the extraneous 'I had'. Suggestion: Read sentences aloud to catch repetitions and ensure each clause connects logically.

× I really had very good memories in the parks, so I enjoyed my time there.

✓ I have very good memories of the parks, so I enjoyed my time there.

Using 'had' with 'memories' and 'in the parks' is awkward. 'Have memories of' is the natural collocation for past experiences that still hold; 'in' should be 'of'. Keep 'enjoyed' for the past action. Suggestion: Use common preposition-object pairs like 'memories of'.

× I love going to parks even now because I like spending time over there.

✓ I love going to parks even now because I like spending time there.

'Over there' is informal and redundant with 'spending time'; 'there' is sufficient. Use simple 'there' for location. Suggestion: Prefer concise prepositions unless emphasis is needed.

× It gives me a good refreshment, it helps me relieve my stress and it also boost my mood every now and then, so I often visit.

✓ It refreshes me, helps me relieve stress, and also boosts my mood, so I often visit.

'Gives me a good refreshment' is unnatural; use 'refreshes me.' 'Relieve my stress' should be 'relieve stress' (no possessive needed). Subject-verb agreement error: 'it also boost' should be 'boosts'. Separate clauses with commas and use parallel verb forms. Suggestion: Use concise verbs and ensure subject-verb agreement.

× Oh, currently Narsity, we have very good number of parks which allow people to visit, uh.

✓ Oh, currently in Narsity, we have a very good number of parks that people can visit.

Missing preposition 'in' before the place name; 'a very good number of' requires the article 'a'; use 'that people can visit' instead of 'which allow people to visit' for clarity. Suggestion: Include necessary prepositions and articles and prefer 'that' for essential clauses.

× I want to visit Cuban Park, which is one of the biggest park in our city, Umm, because I wanted to paint, uh, the trees which are present in that particular park, uh, there are very special to me.

✓ I want to visit Cuban Park, which is one of the biggest parks in our city, because I want to paint the trees in that park; they are very special to me.

'One of the biggest park' should be plural 'parks' after 'one of the'. Tense inconsistency: 'I wanted to paint' should be 'I want to paint' to match the present intention. 'Which are present in that particular park' is wordy; use 'in that park'. The clause 'there are very special to me' is incorrect word order and pronoun; use 'they are very special to me.' Suggestion: Keep number agreement after 'one of the', maintain consistent tense for current intentions, and use concise phrasing.

× So I'm looking forward to visit that particular park.

✓ So I'm looking forward to visiting that park.

After 'looking forward to', use the gerund ('visiting'), not the base verb 'to visit'. Also 'particular' is unnecessary; concise phrasing is better. Suggestion: Remember verbs after prepositions require gerunds.