Parks— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Give a direct topic sentence, avoid hesitation and repetition, correct grammar (past simple), and add one specific supporting detail. Use linking word if adding detail.

Example: Not really. When I was a child there weren’t many parks or playgrounds near my neighborhood, so we usually visited friends’ houses or played in the streets instead.

Suggestion: Start with a clear topic sentence, correct word choice and tense, reduce fillers, and give one clear reason with a linking word. Use specific vocabulary (e.g., relax, unwind, walk).

Example: Yes, I do. There are many beautiful parks in Saigon, and I often go for a walk to relax after a stressful day of studying.

Suggestion: Answer directly, fix grammar (countable nouns, verbs), use linking words (because, so), and give a specific reason and example (free, family-friendly). Keep it concise (≤5 sentences).

Example: Yes, I would. Because there are relatively few parks and many commercial cafés, I would prefer more free, green spaces where families can relax and enjoy sightseeing without spending money.

Suggestion: Give a clear, grammatical topic sentence and one or two specific details. Avoid unclear phrases; use correct future forms and concise phrasing. Mention a particular type of park or activity you want to do with your future children.

Example: Yes. In the future I would like to visit large family-friendly parks with playgrounds so my children can play safely while I relax or watch them.

× We always, we, we were always go to, uh, others house.

✓ We always went to other people's houses.

The sentence uses 'were go' which is incorrect. This should be simple past 'went' to describe repeated past action. Also use the plural possessive 'other people's houses' for multiple houses. Suggestion: use simple past for habitual actions in the past (we always went).

× in Saigon there are many beautiful parts for me to like to wipe down after a stressful day of studying.

✓ In Saigon there are many beautiful parks for me to visit after a stressful day of studying.

The speaker used 'parts' instead of 'parks' (word choice) and 'to like to wipe down' is ungrammatical. Use 'parks' and the verb 'visit' to express going to relax. 'Wipe down' is wrong contextually. Suggestion: choose correct noun and a common verb like 'visit' or 'go to' for places.

× So, uh, until now, uh, when I got older, I want to go to the park more.

✓ So, up until now, as I have gotten older, I want to go to the park more.

Tense and temporal phrases are mixed: 'until now' with 'when I got older' (past) conflicts with present 'want'. Use present perfect 'have gotten' or rephrase 'as I got older' with past context. Here present desire is maintained so use 'have gotten' to link past to present. Suggestion: keep consistent tense when linking past change to current desire.

× because until now there are really a limited parks in my city, there are too many coffee shop and maybe I want to find somewhere that is free and that is don't cost money, but I can also sightseeing.

✓ because up until now there are really limited parks in my city, there are too many coffee shops and maybe I want to find somewhere that is free and does not cost money, where I can also go sightseeing.

Errors: 'a limited parks' mixes singular article with plural noun — remove 'a' or use 'a limited number of parks'. 'coffee shop' should be plural 'coffee shops'. 'that is don't cost money' is incorrect auxiliary and subject-verb agreement; use 'does not cost money'. 'also sightseeing' needs verb: 'go sightseeing'. Suggestion: match articles with noun number, pluralize countable nouns, and use correct subject-verb agreement.

× Maybe is can cause aboundments or like many many years later in the future when I have my old child that I can go to a beautiful park or like to have a playground for my son or my daughter to play together with them.

✓ Maybe it can happen many years later in the future, when I have an older child, that I can go to a beautiful park or have a playground for my son or daughter to play with them.

Multiple issues: 'is can' is incorrect modal construction; use 'it can' or 'it may'. 'aboundments' is wrong word; use 'happen' or 'become available'. 'my old child' should be 'an older child' and 'to have a playground for my son or my daughter to play together with them' is wordy and ungrammatical — simplify to 'have a playground for my son or daughter to play in' or 'so they can play together'. Suggestion: use correct modal structure (may/can), choose correct vocabulary, and simplify clause structure.