Parks— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise, correct grammar and vary vocabulary. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition (e.g., 'often'), and use past tense consistently. Add one specific detail (a memory or feeling) and connect sentences with simple linking words (e.g., 'because', 'so').

Example: Yes — I loved going to parks as a child. I often played hide-and-seek there with my friends, and I remember hiding behind a big oak tree once and feeling excited every time I was found. Because we played until late evening, the park became my favorite place to relax and laugh.

Suggestion: Use correct tense and clear phrasing, avoid unclear phrases ('breast fresh air', 'let myself until clean up my mind'). Provide a concise topic sentence, then one or two clear supporting details using linking words ('so', 'to').

Example: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks. I usually go with friends to jog or take a walk to get fresh air and relieve stress, so it helps me clear my mind after a busy day.

Suggestion: Good response and clear reasons. Make it more natural by tightening sentences and using precise vocabulary (e.g., 'improve air quality' instead of 'refresh its air'). Use a linking phrase for reasons ('because', 'also').

Example: Yes, I would. I think more parks are important because people need places to unwind after busy days, and parks also help improve air quality in cities that suffer from heavy traffic.

Suggestion: Give a clear, complete description with correct nouns and capitalization (e.g., 'swans', not 'Swans'). Avoid repetition of 'also' and finish your thought. Use linking words ('for example', 'besides') and one specific sensory detail to make it vivid.

Example: Yes — there is a beautiful park near my neighborhood that feels like a small forest. It has many tall trees, meandering streams and a lake where you can see swans and squirrels; for example, I like sitting by the water and listening to birds, which relaxes me.

× We often play hide and seek and as the seeker, I always found my friends in the corners of the park.

✓ We often played hide-and-seek and as the seeker, I always found my friends in the corners of the park.

The context is about childhood (past), so verbs should be in the past tense. 'play' should be 'played'. Also 'hide and seek' is commonly hyphenated as 'hide-and-seek' when used as a noun phrase. Keep tense consistent by using past tense verbs throughout the sentence.

× I love the way how we play together until late evening.

✓ I loved the way we played together until late evening.

The sentence refers to past experiences, so present tense 'love' and 'play' are inconsistent. Use past tense 'loved' and 'played'. Also 'the way how' is redundant; use 'the way we played'.

× Yes, even though now I grow up as a an adult I always go to the park with my friends to jog or walk to breast fresh air and to let myself until clean up my mind. I think it's.

✓ Yes, although I am now grown up, I always go to the park with my friends to jog or walk to breathe fresh air and to clear my mind.

Multiple tense and form errors: 'grow up' should be 'grown up' (past participle used in present-state expression 'I am grown up'). 'a an' is an article error (extra 'a'). 'breast fresh air' is incorrect; correct verb is 'breathe fresh air'. 'let myself until clean up my mind' is ungrammatical; the intended meaning is 'to clear my mind'. Remove 'to' before 'clear' and use the correct verb. Also 'I think it's.' is incomplete and unnecessary; remove it.

× Yes, and I think it's very important to have more parks in the city because nowadays people are busy, so they need somewhere to unwind after a busy day and it's also a good place for the city to refresh its air after the busy harsh traffic.

✓ Yes, I think it is very important to have more parks in the city because people are busy nowadays, so they need somewhere to unwind after a hectic day; parks also help refresh the city's air amid heavy traffic.

The original sentence is long and repetitive and uses awkward conjunctions. 'Yes, and I think it's' is wordy; 'Yes, I think it is' is clearer. 'Nowadays' is better placed after 'busy' or rephrased as shown. 'Busy harsh traffic' is incorrect collocation; use 'heavy traffic' or 'hectic traffic'. Split ideas with a semicolon or separate clauses to improve clarity.

× Yes, there is a beautiful and a white park in my city.

✓ Yes, there is a beautiful white park in my city.

Using both 'a' before each adjective is unnecessary. Combine adjectives directly before the noun: 'a beautiful white park'. Also ensure article use matches singular noun.

× The city has a lot of trees and it's like a forest and also there are small streams and lakes and also I can see some small animals like Swans and the squirrels.

✓ The city has many trees and it feels like a forest; there are small streams and lakes, and I can see small animals like swans and squirrels.

Overuse of 'and' and 'also' makes the sentence run-on; combine clauses with punctuation and fewer conjunctions. Use 'many trees' instead of 'a lot of trees' for formality. 'Swans' should be lowercase unless a proper noun. Remove the article before 'squirrels' when listing species. Maintain parallel structure.

× It makes me.

✓ It makes me happy.

The sentence is incomplete; 'It makes me' requires a complement (an adjective or clause) to complete the thought, e.g., 'happy' or 'feel relaxed'. Provide the appropriate adjective to finish the sentence.