Parks— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and correct basic grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid hesitations and repetition.

Example: I didn’t often go to parks alone as a child. If a friend came with me, however, I enjoyed playing games like hide-and-seek and swinging on the playground because those activities were fun and social.

Suggestion: Answer directly and use clearer tense and vocabulary. Give a concise reason and one specific example of what keeps you busy now. Reduce fillers and correct mistakes like 'befores' and 'do not to'.

Example: Not really — I rarely go now because I’m busy with university work and assignments. For example, I often spend weekends writing essays or studying for exams, so I don’t have much free time for the park.

Suggestion: Express your idea with correct grammar and include one concrete benefit with a linking word. Avoid vague phrases and improve collocation (e.g., 'native person' → 'local', 'one of my biggest dream' → 'one of my biggest dreams').

Example: Yes, absolutely. As a local of Chengdu, one of my biggest hopes is to see more parks built because they improve air quality and provide green space for families to relax.

Suggestion: Be specific and use correct verb forms. Give a short topic sentence and one or two specific activities you would do there. Remove hesitations and correct 'got there every day' to 'go there'.

Example: I don’t have a particular dream park, but I often visit the small park in my neighborhood. When I have free time and light workloads, I go there to exercise, meet friends, or read on a bench.

× Well, to be honest, when I was the child, I'm not very into going to the park, umm, at least by myself.

✓ Well, to be honest, when I was a child, I wasn't very into going to the park, umm, at least by myself.

The phrase 'the child' incorrectly uses the definite article; use the indefinite 'a child' for general reference to one's childhood. Also verb tense and agreement: 'I'm not very into' should be past tense 'I wasn't very into' to match 'when I was a child'. Suggestion: use 'when I was a child' and keep tense consistent by using past tense verbs for past situations.

× So if there were, if there was someone would like to accompany with me, I'd like to go with them and like to play some games in the park.

✓ So if there was someone who wanted to accompany me, I'd like to go with them and play some games in the park.

Multiple issues: 'there were, if there was' is unnecessary and confusing. Use a conditional with 'if there was someone who wanted to accompany me'. 'Accompany with me' is incorrect preposition use; 'accompany me' is correct. 'Would like' followed by 'I'd like' is repetitive; keep 'I'd like to go' and use base verb 'play' not 'like to play' to improve fluency. Suggestion: simplify condition and correct preposition.

× For example, we could play hide and seek, we could do something else.

✓ For example, we could play hide-and-seek or do other things.

This sentence uses modal 'could' appropriately for past habitual possibility, but style and coordination need improvement. Use hyphenated 'hide-and-seek' and parallel structure 'or do other things' rather than 'we could do something else' for clearer, more natural English. Suggestion: maintain parallel verb forms and natural collocations.

× Well actually no, I have more things to do than befores when I grow up.

✓ Well actually no, I have more things to do than before now that I have grown up.

'Befores' is not a correct plural noun; use 'before'. Tense and time reference mismatch: 'when I grow up' should be past reference 'now that I have grown up' or 'since I grew up' to indicate current situation. Suggestion: use 'before' and adjust tense to 'now that I have grown up' to match present circumstances.

× So like I have to deal with my academic study, I have to face the assessment assignments and even essay.

✓ For example, I have to deal with my academic studies; I have to face assessments and even essays.

Use plural 'studies' for general academic work, and pluralize countable nouns 'assessments' and 'essays' when speaking generally. 'The' was incorrectly used or omitted; better to use plural forms without 'the' for general reference. Suggestion: pluralize countable nouns and use parallel structure with semicolon or conjunction.

× But umm when I when it is in my childhood, I do not to consider about these things.

✓ But umm when I was a child, I didn't have to think about these things.

'When it is in my childhood' is awkward and incorrect; use 'when I was a child' or 'in my childhood'. 'I do not to consider about' mixes modal/infinitive forms incorrectly; correct expression is 'didn't have to think about' or 'didn't need to think about'. Also remove incorrect preposition 'consider about' — use 'think about' or 'consider' (without 'about'). Suggestion: use simple past for past situations and correct verb phrases like 'have to' and 'think about'.

× Just you know, play with my friend.

✓ I just, you know, played with my friends.

Sentence fragment lacks subject and correct tense. 'Play with my friend' should match past narrative: 'I played with my friends'. Use plural 'friends' if general, or keep singular but include subject 'I' and past tense 'played'. Suggestion: include subject and correct past tense; choose singular/plural consistently.

× As the native person in Chengdu, one of my biggest dream is to wish the city to become better and better.

✓ As a native of Chengdu, one of my biggest dreams is to see the city become better and better.

'The native person' incorrectly uses definite article; use 'a native of Chengdu'. 'One of my biggest dream' needs plural 'dreams'. 'Wish the city to become' is unnatural; use 'see the city become' or 'wish for the city to become'. Suggestion: use natural collocations 'a native of', pluralize 'dreams', and use 'see' or 'wish for'.

× So build more park in my city.

✓ So build more parks in my city.

Imperative fragment lacks subject and correct number. To express a desire: 'So they should build more parks in my city' or 'So I hope they build more parks in my city.' Also 'park' should be plural 'parks' for general suggestion. Suggestion: convert fragment into a full sentence and pluralize 'parks'.

× That is the great way to provide much benefits to the environment and that is eco friendly.

✓ That is a great way to provide many benefits to the environment and it is eco-friendly.

Use 'a great way' (indefinite article) rather than 'the great way' for general statement. 'Much benefits' is incorrect; use 'many benefits' for countable 'benefits'. 'Eco friendly' should be hyphenated 'eco-friendly' and 'that is' repeated is awkward; use 'and it is eco-friendly'. Suggestion: use correct articles, quantifiers, and hyphenation.

× Well, to be honest, I do not have any dream park, but just, uh, a park in my neighborhood.

✓ Well, to be honest, I don't have any dream park; I just want a park in my neighborhood.

'Do not have any dream park' is understandable but awkward; 'I don't have any dream park' is fine but better phrased 'I don't have a dream park; I just want a park...'. Add verb 'want' to complete thought. Suggestion: include main verb 'want' to express desire.

× I got there every day, umm, when I have free time, when I do not uh, have heavy workloads or even assessment, I will go this park and have some exercise or play with my friends there.

✓ I go there every day when I have free time; when I don't have heavy workloads or assessments, I go to this park to exercise or play with my friends there.

Mixed tenses and incorrect verb forms: 'I got there every day' (past) conflicts with 'when I have free time' (present). For habitual present action, use present simple 'I go there every day'. 'Do not have heavy workloads or even assessment' should be 'don't have heavy workloads or assessments'. 'I will go this park' is incorrect; use 'I go to this park' or 'I will go to this park' depending on meaning. Suggestion: use present simple for habits, correct preposition 'go to', pluralize 'assessments', and use 'exercise' as verb form 'to exercise'.