Parks— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Cải thiện ngữ pháp và thì, tránh lặp từ, và làm câu tự nhiên hơn. Cụ thể: dùng thì quá khứ cho hành động trong quá khứ (liked, could play), sửa lỗi mạo từ (the park), rút gọn câu tránh lặp như “beautiful scenes”, và giới thiệu từ nối nếu mở rộng thêm thông tin.

Example: Yes, I liked going to the park as a child because I could play games with my friends. Also, I enjoyed walking around and admiring the scenery, which felt peaceful.

Suggestion: Sửa lỗi thì và sử dụng câu trực tiếp, tránh mâu thuẫn thì (came → come). Nên bắt đầu bằng một câu chủ đề ngắn, sau đó bổ sung lý do với liên từ (because, so) và chi tiết cụ thể về cảm nhận hoặc hoạt động bạn làm ở công viên.

Example: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they help me relax. For example, I often sit on a bench and read or take a short walk, which makes me feel refreshed.

Suggestion: Tránh lặp từ và mở rộng giải thích hợp lý hơn. Thay vì trả lời quá ngắn (No, I don't), bắt đầu bằng câu chủ đề rõ ràng (Not really/I wouldn’t), rồi nêu lý do cụ thể (vị trí, tiện ích, cây xanh, không khí). Sửa lặp "every beautiful every beautiful scene" và dùng từ vựng phù hợp hơn.

Example: Not really — I’m happy with the park near my house because it has plenty of green space and clean air. It also has good facilities like benches and walking paths, so I don’t feel the city needs more parks nearby.

Suggestion: Hạn chế lời nói quá phóng đại (“every park in the world”) và đưa ra mục tiêu cụ thể kèm lý do. Sử dụng liên từ để nối hai ý (because, so) và mô tả chi tiết hơn về loại công viên bạn muốn thăm hoặc lý do chụp ảnh.

Example: Yes, I’d love to visit famous parks abroad, such as national parks or botanical gardens, because I enjoy photographing different landscapes and learning about local plants.

× Yes, I really like going to park as a child because in the park I could play games with my friends or I can go around the park and watch the beautiful scenes.

✓ Yes, I really liked going to the park as a child because in the park I could play games with my friends or I could walk around the park and watch the beautiful scenery.

Use 'the' before singular countable noun 'park' when referring to a specific place: 'going to the park'. Also maintain past tense ('liked') to match 'as a child' and use consistent past modal 'could' rather than mixing 'could' and 'can'. Replace plural 'scenes' with uncountable 'scenery' for natural English.

× Yes, I still like going to parks now because when I came to the park I still feel comfortable and relaxed.

✓ Yes, I still like going to parks now because when I come to the park I still feel comfortable and relaxed.

Tense consistency: main clause is present ('still like'), so subordinate clause should use present simple ('come') rather than past ('came'). Keep 'feel' in present to match 'when I come'.

× No, I don't. I think the park near my house is perfect. In the park I can see every beautiful every beautiful scene I want and it has fresh air and nice people too.

✓ No, I don't. I think the park near my house is perfect. In the park I can see every beautiful scene I want, and it has fresh air and nice people too.

Remove duplicated phrase 'every beautiful'. 'Every beautiful scene' is acceptable, but 'every' plus 'scene' is less natural than 'any beautiful scene' — however to keep original meaning minimal change is to delete duplication. Also add a comma before 'and' for clarity.

× Yes, I want to explore every park in the world. I want to take a photo of the park.

✓ Yes, I want to explore every park in the world. I want to take photos of the parks.

Number and article agreement: if you plan to explore every park, taking a single photo 'of the park' is inconsistent; plural 'photos of the parks' matches the intended meaning. Use plural nouns to reflect multiple items.