Travelling— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid grammar errors (e.g., "gives fresh air" → "lets me enjoy fresh air"), and limit to at most five sentences. Add one specific detail and use linking words for coherence (e.g., "because" already used, add "for example" or "so" and avoid contractions like "that's").

Example: I prefer to sit by the window when travelling because it lets me enjoy the fresh air and the view. For example, on bus trips I like watching mountains and villages pass by, which helps me relax. So I usually choose a window seat to feel more connected to nature.

Suggestion: Reduce hesitations and repetition, give a clearer topic sentence, add specific details (when, who, what made it memorable) and link ideas logically. Correct grammar (e.g., "where it was a couple of hours from my city") and avoid filler words like "uh". Keep to three to four polished sentences.

Example: Yes, I went on a long family road trip to Manali when I was about ten. It was a two- to three-hour drive from our city, Archwood, and although the journey was tiring, we enjoyed the scenic mountain views and stopped at small villages along the way. Overall, it was a memorable experience because we spent quality time together.

× Yes, I prefer to sit by the window while traveling because it gives a fresh air.

✓ Yes, I prefer to sit by the window while traveling because it gives me fresh air.

The phrase 'a fresh air' is incorrect because 'air' in this context is an uncountable noun and does not take the indefinite article 'a'. Adding 'me' clarifies the effect on the speaker. Suggestion: use 'fresh air' without an article or add a possessive/object pronoun as needed (e.g., 'gives me fresh air').

× When I keep the window open, I feel connected to the nature and I love to see all the scenarios that's around.

✓ When I keep the window open, I feel connected to nature and I love to see all the scenery that's around.

1) 'to the nature' is incorrect: 'nature' is an uncountable noun and normally used without 'the' in this sense, so use 'connected to nature'. 2) 'scenarios' is the wrong word for landscapes or scenes; 'scenery' is the correct uncountable noun. 3) 'that's around' is informal and uses a contraction plus singular 'that' with unclear reference; better: 'that are around' or simply 'around' after 'scenery'. Suggestion: use 'connected to nature' and 'scenery around' or 'the scenery around'.

× When I keep the window open, I feel connected to the nature and I love to see all the scenarios that's around.

✓ When I keep the window open, I feel connected to nature and I love to see all the scenery that's around.

'that's' is a contraction of 'that is' and does not agree with plural noun idea; since 'scenery' is uncountable singular, 'that's around' is awkward. Use 'that is around' only if referring to a singular noun; better to rephrase to 'scenery around' or 'the scenery that's around'. Suggestion: match verb number to noun and prefer clearer phrasing: 'the scenery around'.

× Yes, I had a long journey as a child with my family. We were going on a road trip to Manali where uh, it like the destination is a couple of hours from my city which is Archwood.

✓ Yes, I had a long journey as a child with my family. We went on a road trip to Manali, which is a couple of hours from my city, Archwood.

1) 'We were going on a road trip' uses past continuous but a simple past 'we went' is more natural for a completed trip. 2) 'where uh, it like the destination is' is ungrammatical and contains filler words. Replace with a clear relative clause: 'which is a couple of hours from my city'. Suggestion: use simple past for completed actions and remove fillers for clarity.

× But it, it was tiring but a great experience.

✓ It was tiring, but a great experience.

The original repeats 'but' and stutters ('it, it') and has redundant conjunctions. Correct structure uses a single 'but' and removes repeated words: 'It was tiring, but a great experience.' Suggestion: avoid repetitions and use a single conjunction to connect contrasting ideas.