Part 1
Examiner
Do you look out the window at the scenery when travelling by bus or car?
Candidate
Yes, and from my point of view I think so. It is the most important thing when you are travelling because the scenery and the view of from your window is the main thing you are travelling for. And I use uh and I mostly tend to see the view to escape my Boris on.
Examiner
Do you take photos of the scenery outside the car window?
Candidate
As I'm a photogenic person, I really like to click pictures of the things that are really aesthetic and then I the things I really felt that were fantastic. And I have my gallery filled with pictures of mountains or scenery, views of sunsets or sunrises, and I really like to capture it from my car window whenever I'm traveling.
Examiner
Do you prefer the mountains or the sea?
Candidate
I really prefer mountains more than seas because I feel more relaxed, uh, in mountainous areas because uh, in my region I'm only accessible to mountains only and I have never went to a sea area. And I really find mountains more fascinating because it really has amazing views.
Do you look out the window at the scenery when travelling by bus or car?
Score: 58.0Suggestion: Be direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition and filler words (uh, and, I think so). Use one or two specific supporting details and a linking word. Also correct grammar (e.g., 'the view from the window') and avoid unclear phrases ('escape my Boris on').
Example: Yes. I usually look out the window when I travel because I enjoy watching changing landscapes. For example, I like to see farmland and cityscapes pass by, which helps me relax during long journeys.
Do you take photos of the scenery outside the car window?
Score: 72.0Suggestion: Be more precise and natural in vocabulary and structure. Avoid awkward phrases like 'I'm a photogenic person' (means attractive) and 'click pictures of the things that are really aesthetic'. Use linking words to connect reason and example, and keep it within 3–4 sentences.
Example: Yes, I often take photos from the car window because I enjoy capturing interesting landscapes. For instance, I frequently photograph sunsets, mountain ridges and fields, and then add the best shots to my gallery to remember the trip.
Do you prefer the mountains or the sea?
Score: 66.0Suggestion: Give a clear topic sentence and two concise supporting reasons using linking words. Fix grammar mistakes ('I have never gone to the sea', 'only accessible to mountains'). Avoid repetition of 'because' and filler sounds.
Example: I prefer the mountains. Firstly, they help me relax because of the fresh air and quiet surroundings. Secondly, I find mountain scenery more fascinating and, since I grew up near hills and have never been to the sea, I feel more connected to them.
× Yes, and from my point of view I think so.
✓ Yes, from my point of view, I do.
The original sentence includes an unnecessary 'and' and informal 'I think so' which is redundant after 'from my point of view'. Use present simple 'do' for emphasis. Remove filler 'and' and add commas for clarity.
× It is the most important thing when you are travelling because the scenery and the view of from your window is the main thing you are travelling for.
✓ It is the most important thing when you are travelling because the scenery and the view from your window are the main reasons you travel.
The phrase 'view of from your window' is incorrect; use 'view from your window'. 'Scenery and the view' are two subjects, so use plural verb 'are' (subject-verb agreement). Replace 'the main thing you are travelling for' with 'the main reasons you travel' to improve sentence structure and clarity.
× And I use uh and I mostly tend to see the view to escape my Boris on.
✓ I mostly look at the view to escape my boredom.
The original contains fillers 'uh', repeated 'and I', and the unclear phrase 'escape my Boris on' (likely intended 'escape my boredom'). Simplify to 'I mostly look at the view' and correct the vocabulary to 'boredom'.
× As I'm a photogenic person, I really like to click pictures of the things that are really aesthetic and then I the things I really felt that were fantastic.
✓ As I'm interested in photography, I really like to take pictures of things that I find aesthetically pleasing and that I think are fantastic.
'Photogenic person' is incorrect for someone who likes photography; use 'interested in photography'. 'Click pictures' is informal; use 'take pictures'. 'Really aesthetic' is awkward; use 'aesthetically pleasing'. The clause 'then I the things I really felt' is ungrammatical and was rephrased to 'that I find ... and that I think are'.
× And I have my gallery filled with pictures of mountains or scenery, views of sunsets or sunrises, and I really like to capture it from my car window whenever I'm traveling.
✓ I have my gallery filled with pictures of mountains, scenery, and views of sunsets and sunrises, and I really like to capture them from my car window whenever I'm travelling.
Use parallel listing without 'or' between similar nouns ('mountains, scenery, and views'). 'It' is singular but refers to plural 'pictures', so use 'them'. Maintain British spelling 'travelling' to match original; ensure present perfect 'have filled' is fine.
× I really prefer mountains more than seas because I feel more relaxed, uh, in mountainous areas because uh, in my region I'm only accessible to mountains only and I have never went to a sea area.
✓ I prefer mountains to the sea because I feel more relaxed in mountainous areas; in my region, only mountains are accessible and I have never been to the sea.
Use 'prefer X to Y' rather than 'prefer X more than Y'. Remove filler 'uh'. 'I'm only accessible to mountains only' is ungrammatical; rephrase to 'only mountains are accessible'. Use present perfect 'have never been' not 'have never went' (went is past tense). Avoid repeating 'only'.
× And I really find mountains more fascinating because it really has amazing views.
✓ I find mountains more fascinating because they have amazing views.
Subject 'mountains' is plural, so use plural pronoun 'they' and plural verb 'have' (subject-verb agreement). Remove redundant 'really' and 'it' which incorrectly refers to plural 'mountains'.