Travelling— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence (e.g. “Yes, I usually look out the window.”), avoid irrelevant sentences and grammatical mistakes, and use one or two specific details with linking words. Keep answers under five sentences and use natural phrasing (e.g. “scenery” not “sceneries”).

Example: Yes, I usually look out the window when I travel by bus or car. For example, when I visited other countries I enjoyed watching the countryside and small towns pass by, which helped me feel excited about the trip. Because I like observing local life and landscapes, I often point out interesting places to my friends.

Suggestion: Give a clear direct answer first, then add one or two concise reasons using linking words. Avoid repetition and unclear words. Use correct collocations (e.g. “take photos” and “blurry photos”) and correct article use.

Example: Not usually. Because the car is moving, my photos often come out blurry, so I prefer to take pictures when we stop. However, if I see something special from the window, I might try to take a quick shot.

Suggestion: Answer directly and support with specific, correctly worded reasons and examples. Use accurate vocabulary for activities (e.g. “surfing” not “staffing”) and avoid overlong or unclear phrases. Mention one or two typical activities you do and where, linked logically.

Example: I prefer the sea because I enjoy water sports. For example, every summer I go to beaches in Kanagawa Prefecture to surf and snorkel, which I find relaxing and exciting.

× Yes, I went about.

✓ Yes, I have traveled a lot.

The original 'I went about' is unnatural and uses simple past incorrectly. Use present perfect 'have traveled' to indicate experience over time. Also 'went about' is not idiomatic for travelling frequently; 'traveled a lot' is clearer. Suggestion: use 'I have traveled a lot' to express past experiences relevant to now.

× I tried other countries.

✓ I have visited other countries.

'I tried other countries' incorrectly uses 'try' and simple past. Visiting countries is better expressed with 'visit.' Use present perfect 'have visited' to indicate past experiences that are relevant now. Suggestion: say 'I have visited other countries.'

× I usually look through the windows in order to see the sceneries.

✓ I usually look out of the window to see the scenery.

'Sceneries' is incorrect; 'scenery' is an uncountable noun. 'Look out of the window' is the standard phrase. This matches 'Singular and plural issue' (ID 1) and 'Article errors' (ID 22) considerations; main issue is pluralization. Suggestion: use 'the scenery' and 'look out of the window'.

× By looking at them, I can feel that I have a sense of traveling to that makes me fully ready for the excitement to come.

✓ Looking at it gives me a feeling of traveling and makes me ready for the excitement to come.

Original sentence is awkward and contains unnecessary words ('to' after 'traveling', 'them' for uncountable 'scenery'). Restructure to a clear clause: 'Looking at it gives me a feeling of traveling and makes me ready...'. This fixes sentence structure errors (ID 26) and pronoun use (ID 12). Suggestion: simplify and use correct pronoun 'it' for 'scenery'.

× I don't usually take photos outside of the windows simply because it is harder to capture the UMM sceneries as the cars are moving, so I get photos with the UMM with my hand shaking, so the quality of them would not be so good.

✓ I don't usually take photos through car windows because it is harder to capture the scenery when the car is moving, so my photos often turn out blurry and of poor quality.

Multiple problems: 'outside of the windows' is wordy; 'UMM' appears irrelevant; 'sceneries' should be 'scenery'; 'with my hand shaking' is awkward; tense and modality inconsistent. Reformulated in present simple to match habitual action. This addresses present tense issue (ID 6), singular/plural (ID 1), and pronoun/phrasing issues (ID 12/26). Suggestion: use 'through car windows', 'scenery', and describe result as 'blurry' or 'of poor quality'.

× I prefer the sea to the mountains simply because I am a avid fan of marine sports.

✓ I prefer the sea to the mountains because I am an avid fan of water sports.

'Marine sports' is understandable but 'water sports' is more natural. 'Avid fan of' is acceptable; removed 'simply' for conciseness. This is an issue of word choice/adjective usage (ID 13). Suggestion: use 'water sports'.

× Every time summer comes, I go to the beaches in the Kanagawa Prefecture in order to enjoy the marine sports, including staffing and chinookling.

✓ Every summer, I go to the beaches in Kanagawa Prefecture to enjoy water sports, including surfing and canoeing.

'Every time summer comes' is wordy; 'the beaches in the Kanagawa Prefecture' should be 'beaches in Kanagawa Prefecture'; 'marine sports' changed to 'water sports'; 'staffing and chinookling' appear to be misspellings of 'surfing and canoeing' or similar. Use simple present habitual tense. This corrects present tense usage (ID 6), article errors (ID 22), and incorrect word forms (ID 13). Suggestion: verify the intended activities and use correct spellings like 'surfing' and 'canoeing'.