Building— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Avoid repetition.

Example: Yes. My apartment is surrounded by many tall buildings. For example, several new high-rises nearby are taller than my block, so they block my views of both the sea and the nearby mountains.

Suggestion: Correct grammar and use clearer vocabulary. Begin with a direct answer, then give a specific example and a brief contrast. Use linking words like 'but' or 'however'.

Example: Sometimes. I take photos when a building has interesting architecture; for example, when I visited Sydney I took many pictures of the Opera House because of its unique design. However, I usually don't photograph ordinary residential buildings.

Suggestion: Remove fillers and hesitations. Respond directly, then give a specific reason and mention what you would do before visiting. Use linking words like 'because' and 'so'.

Example: Yes — I would like to visit the Eiffel Tower in France because of its iconic iron lattice structure. Before going, I would research its history and architectural design so I can appreciate the details when I see it in person.

Suggestion: Be specific and avoid repetition. State your main point clearly, then give one or two concrete reasons with a linking word like 'because' or 'so'.

Example: Yes. I prefer living in a tall building because I like being on a higher floor for a better view and more natural light. Also, tall buildings often have better amenities and security, which are important to me.

× Yes, my apartment is surrounded by a lot of buildings and they are quite tall.

✓ Yes, my apartment is surrounded by a lot of buildings, and they are quite tall.

Comma added for clarity, but no plural error; sentence is correct regarding singular/plural. Suggestion: Keep plural 'buildings' to match 'they.'

× Some of them are even taller than where I live in, so it's blocking a lot of views from the sea and mountain.

✓ Some of them are even taller than the place where I live, so they block many views of the sea and the mountains.

Original uses awkward structure 'taller than where I live in' and incorrect verb agreement 'it's blocking' referring to plural 'them.' Change to 'the place where I live' and match plural subject with plural verb 'they block.' Use 'many views of the sea and the mountains' for natural expression.

× I think it depends on I like thick buildings of some with some architecture designs.

✓ I think it depends on whether I like certain buildings with particular architectural designs.

Original misuses pronouns and determiners ('I like thick buildings of some with some architecture designs'). Use 'whether' to introduce the condition, 'certain' for some particular buildings, and 'architectural designs' is the correct noun phrase.

× When I'm traveling, for example the I just visit the Sydney and I took a lot of picture of the design of the Opera House of Sydney, but I don't take picture of any resident place.

✓ When I was traveling, for example when I visited Sydney, I took a lot of pictures of the design of the Sydney Opera House, but I don't take pictures of residential places.

Tense inconsistency: use past tense 'was traveling' and 'visited' to describe past travel. Plural forms 'pictures' and correct word order 'Sydney Opera House.' 'Resident place' is incorrect; use 'residential places.' Also remove extra article 'the' before 'Sydney.'

× MMM yes sure. Uh, one comes out my mind is that the Eiffel Tower in France?

✓ Mm, yes, sure. One that comes to my mind is the Eiffel Tower in France.

Original is ungrammatical and uses a question mark unnecessarily. Use 'one that comes to my mind' or 'one that comes to mind' and a period. Remove fillers or reduce them for clarity.

× So I but before visiting it I would like to do some research about the architecture and the design of it.

✓ But before visiting it, I would like to do some research about its architecture and design.

Move 'but' to start of sentence correctly, add comma after introductory clause, and use possessive 'its' instead of 'of it.' 'Architecture and design' do not both need 'the.'

× Yes, the most important essential factors of renting an apartment for me is that I uh, the, the, the flow of the building.

✓ Yes, the most important factor for me when renting an apartment is the flow of the building.

Original has redundancy ('most important essential factors') and subject-verb agreement issue: plural 'factors' with singular verb 'is.' Use singular 'factor' to match 'is.' Remove repeated fillers. 'For me when renting an apartment' is clearer phrasing.

× I prefer living in higher floor to have a better view.

✓ I prefer living on a higher floor to have a better view.

Preposition 'in' is incorrect with 'floor' in this context; use 'on a higher floor.' Add article 'a' before 'higher floor.'