Walking— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and avoid repetition and filler words (e.g. "UH"). Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one specific example with linking words. Correct mistakes and finish sentences fully.

Example: Yes, I walk a lot. I prefer walking to driving, especially when there is heavy traffic, because it is faster and healthier. For example, after my university classes finish, I often walk home to avoid the long traffic jams.

Suggestion: Good structure and clear content. Improve by using linking words and a slightly more precise detail and avoid vague phrases like "different stuff." Keep within 3–4 sentences.

Example: Yes, I did. I especially enjoyed walking with my brother; we would walk for hours and talk about school and our future plans. As a result, those walks helped us build a closer relationship that lasts today.

Suggestion: Finish your answer and avoid vague endings. Use linking words to present reasons clearly and give a specific example. Replace "something else" with concrete activities.

Example: People walk in parks mainly to relax and clear their minds after a stressful day. In addition, some enjoy listening to music, exercising, or socializing with friends. For example, many office workers take a 30-minute walk in the park at lunchtime to reduce stress.

Suggestion: Split into two clear sentences and use linking words to compare choices. Be concise and give one specific reason for each place.

Example: I would like to take a long walk on the beach because walking after swimming helps me relax and enjoy the scenery. Alternatively, I would stroll around my old neighborhood to feel nostalgic and remember childhood memories.

Suggestion: Clarify and correct grammar; avoid repetition. Start with a direct statement about recent walks, then give one specific example with a linking word and finish the idea clearly.

Example: I haven't had many chances to go for long walks recently. However, I often walk home from my classes, and these short walks help me relax because I can listen to my favorite songs and clear my mind.

× I walk a lot. I prefer walking rather than going somewhere with a car.

✓ I walk a lot. I prefer walking to going somewhere by car.

The original uses 'rather than' awkwardly with 'going somewhere with a car' and 'with a car' is not the usual preposition. Use 'prefer X to Y' for comparisons and 'by car' for transport.

× Whenever there's traffic.

✓ I prefer walking when there's traffic.

The original is a sentence fragment lacking a main clause. Combine it with the previous sentence or complete it by showing the effect: 'I prefer walking when there's traffic.'

× For example, after I leave my leave my UH course after my courses end UH because the UH time is a high traffic 1.

✓ For example, after my courses end, I leave and walk because that is a high-traffic time.

The sentence contains repetition ('leave my leave my'), fillers ('UH'), and unclear phrasing. Remove fillers, eliminate repetition, add commas, and clarify meaning: 'after my courses end' and 'that is a high-traffic time.'

× Yes, definitely. I loved to go outside when I was a child, especially with my brother. We would walk for hours and talk about different stuff and we do it now too.

✓ Yes, definitely. I loved going outside when I was a child, especially with my brother. We would walk for hours and talk about different things, and we still do that now.

Use 'loved going' rather than 'loved to go' for natural past preference. 'Stuff' is informal—use 'things.' 'We do it now too' should be 'we still do that now' to indicate continuation from past to present.

× And it really made us connect a lot more than we thought that it would

✓ It really brought us closer than we expected.

Original is wordy and awkward ('connect' used as a verb meaning 'become close' is better as 'brought us closer'). Simplify and use past tense 'brought' consistent with 'made'.

× There are several reasons why different people love to walk in parks, but I think the most common one is that they want to refresh their minds after a stressful workday or maybe listen to music or something else.

✓ There are several reasons why people like to walk in parks, but I think the most common is that they want to refresh their minds after a stressful workday, or maybe listen to music.

Remove 'different' (unnecessary) and streamline 'love to walk' to 'like to walk.' 'Something else' is vague and can be omitted. Use commas for clarity.

× Another reason might be because people want to have

✓ Another reason might be that people want to have some fresh air or exercise.

The original is an incomplete sentence ending abruptly. Complete the thought and avoid 'might be because' (redundant); use 'might be that'.

× I think I would love to go to the beach because I usually walk there after swimming and it helps me to relax my mind and it's another place that I would love to walk in is around my old neighborhood that I used to live in to get the nostalgia from it that I used to get.

✓ I would love to go to the beach because I usually walk there after swimming and it helps me relax. I would also like to walk around my old neighborhood to feel nostalgic.

Original is run-on and repeats phrases ('used to'). Split into two sentences, remove unnecessary 'to' in 'helps me relax,' and use 'feel nostalgic' for natural expression.

× Lately I didn't have any chances to go for a walk a lot.

✓ Lately I haven't had many chances to go for a walk.

Use present perfect 'haven't had' to refer to recent period ('lately'). 'Any chances to go for a walk a lot' is awkward—use 'many chances to go for a walk.'

× However, I've been to I've been going to my house after my courses ended by food and it really helped me to relax because I also got the chance to listen to my favorite songs and suit up my mind

✓ However, I've been going home after my courses end to get food, and it really helps me relax because I can listen to my favorite songs and clear my mind.

Original repeats 'I've been to I've been going' and mixes tenses ('ended'). Use present perfect continuous 'I've been going' if habit continues, or present simple 'after my courses end' for schedule. 'Suit up my mind' is incorrect; use 'clear my mind.' Use 'helps' for habitual present and 'can listen' instead of 'got the chance.'