Shoes— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and correct tense usage. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, and use a mix of linking phrases to add a brief reason. Reduce fillers like 'I will take at a look' and ‘I really enjoy this’ to one natural comment.

Example: Yes, I do. I usually buy shoes about once a month because I enjoy trying new releases; when a new design comes out, I check it online and buy it if it suits my style.

Suggestion: Clarify your initial hesitation and use correct verb forms. Remove filler words and organize your answer: state clearly that you have bought online, give one specific reason, and use linking words for coherence. Correct grammar: 'I have spent' and 'to have them delivered' or 'for delivery'.

Example: Yes, I have bought shoes online many times. I usually spend a lot of time browsing high-resolution photos and reading reviews, so I can choose the right size and have them delivered to my home.

Suggestion: Be precise and use correct expressions for amounts and time. Avoid unclear words like 'grands' (likely 'grand' or 'thousand'). Use present perfect for past trends and explain reasons clearly. Mention a typical monthly or yearly amount and a clear reason for change.

Example: Over the past few years I've spent more than $1,000 on shoes in total. I spent the most during college, but since I started working I spend less because I now prefer practical shoes for work rather than fashionable sneakers.

Suggestion: Correct tense consistency and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence and use linking words to compare past and present preferences. Replace 'it draws it draws others attention' with 'they drew others' attention'.

Example: I used to prefer fashionable shoes in college because they drew attention on campus, but now I prefer comfortable shoes since I often wear them all day at work and need support.

× I like buying shoes about once a month.

✓ I buy shoes about once a month.

The sentence uses 'like buying' which is acceptable but the question asks frequency; using simple present 'I buy' is more natural to express habitual actions. Use simple present for regular habits.

× Whenever there's a new release I will take at a look and buy them if I like them.

✓ Whenever there is a new release I take a look and buy them if I like them.

The original mixes present general condition with 'will' unnecessarily. For habitual actions triggered by a condition, use simple present in both clauses: 'Whenever there is... I take...'. Also remove the preposition 'at' after 'take a look'.

× No, uh, yes, I have bought shoes online many times.

✓ Yes, I have bought shoes online many times.

The response begins with 'No, uh, yes,' which is conversational disfluency. Removing 'No' clarifies the affirmative answer. The tense 'have bought' is correct for experience; just eliminate the contradictory 'No'.

× Actually I spend a lot of time because I can check the shoes photo online and uh, to choose them quickly and delivered.

✓ Actually I spend a lot of time because I can check the shoe photos online and choose them quickly and have them delivered.

Several issues: 'shoes photo' should be pluralized to 'shoe photos' (noun form) and 'to choose' should be parallel with 'check' so use 'choose' not infinitive after 'and'. 'Delivered' needs an agent/auxiliary; use 'have them delivered' to express getting delivery. Use simple present 'spend' for habitual action.

× I spend more than 10 grands on shoes in the past few years.

✓ I have spent more than 10 grand on shoes in the past few years.

Use present perfect 'have spent' for an action extending to the recent past ('in the past few years'). 'Grands' is incorrect; the correct noun is 'grand' (slang) or 'thousand(s)'. Also ensure number agreement; '10 grand' is acceptable.

× I spend the most in my college year, but after I work I have spent less because sneakers are no longer available.

✓ I spent the most during my college years, but after I started working I spent less because I no longer needed sneakers so often.

Tense consistency is required. 'I spend the most in my college year' should be past 'I spent' and 'college year' is better as 'college years' or 'my college year'. 'After I work' is incorrect; use 'after I started working'. 'Have spent less' should align with past context, so 'spent less'. 'Sneakers are no longer available' is wrong meaning; likely you mean 'no longer necessary' or 'no longer appropriate'; corrected to 'no longer needed so often'.

× When I was at college I prefer fashionable shoes because it draws it draws others attention when I walk on the street or on campus.

✓ When I was at college I preferred fashionable shoes because they drew others' attention when I walked on the street or on campus.

Tense agreement: 'When I was at college' sets past context so use past 'preferred' and 'drew'. 'It draws it draws' is a repetition and uses wrong subject; use 'they drew others' attention'. Possessive apostrophe needed in 'others' attention'. Also change 'walk' to past 'walked'.

× But when after I started working, I prefer comfortable shoes because I need to wear them all day long.

✓ But after I started working, I preferred comfortable shoes because I needed to wear them all day long.

Maintain past narrative: 'after I started working' is past, so use past 'preferred' and 'needed'. Remove the extra word 'when' before 'after'. If describing current preference, use present tense consistently, e.g., 'But after I started working, I prefer comfortable shoes because I need to wear them all day.'