Advertisement— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and coherent: give a clear topic sentence, then one or two specific details. Avoid repetition and unclear pronouns. Use linking words to connect ideas and correct grammar (singular/plural, verb forms).

Example: Yes. One advertisement that impressed me as a child was for a jeweller with the slogan 'A diamond is forever.' I remember the ad showed a couple exchanging a ring, which made the message about lasting love very memorable. Because of its emotional imagery, the slogan stayed with me into adulthood.

Suggestion: Reduce fillers and choose precise words. Start with a direct statement, then add two specific examples and one reason using linking words. Replace unclear words ('proper transport', 'apps') with accurate terms.

Example: Yes, I see a lot of advertising on public transport. For example, there are large posters on trains and digital screens on buses and at stations. Because these ads often include short videos or useful travel information, they make waiting time more enjoyable.

Suggestion: Combine short fragments into full sentences and avoid repetition. Provide one clear reason and an example to support your opinion, using linking words like 'because' or 'so'.

Example: Yes, I like some advertisements because they can be both informative and entertaining. For instance, I enjoy analysing memorable slogans since they show how language and imagery are used to persuade customers.

Suggestion: Give a complete, grammatical response: state the type you prefer, explain why with specific details, and finish the example. Avoid unfinished sentences and unclear phrases.

Example: I prefer informative advertisements because they give practical details that help me decide whether to buy a product. For example, a recent ad about the iPhone Pro 17 explained its battery life and camera improvements, which helped me compare it with my current phone.

Suggestion: Be precise and avoid vague or incorrect words ('Resemble'). Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific examples of how ads interrupt you, and finish with a brief consequence or preference.

Example: Yes, I often see ads on my phone and computer, and they usually annoy me because they interrupt what I'm doing. For example, video ads on YouTube sometimes play unexpectedly while I'm listening in the car, which can be distracting and frustrating.

× Yes, when I was a child, I remember.

✓ Yes, when I was a child, I remembered.

The sentence mixes past reference 'when I was a child' with present simple 'I remember.' Use the past simple 'remembered' to match the past time frame. Suggestion: Keep time references consistent by using past tense for past events.

× That said, a diamond ring symbolises symbolise eternal love.

✓ That said, a diamond ring symbolizes eternal love.

The sentence contains a duplicated verb form 'symbolises symbolise' and inconsistent spelling. Remove the duplicate and use a single correct verb 'symbolizes' (US) or 'symbolises' (UK). Ensure only one verb appears. Suggestion: Proofread to delete accidental repetition and choose one spelling convention.

× I truly believe it. And she might.

✓ I truly believed that, and I thought she might too.

The short fragment 'And she might' is unclear and fragments the sentence. Combine ideas into a complete sentence and use past tense to match the context 'when I was a child.' Suggestion: Make sure each clause has a clear subject and verb and maintain consistent tense.

× Advertising on proper transport is very common.

✓ Advertising on public transport is very common.

The adjective 'proper' is incorrect in this context; 'public transport' is the correct collocation for buses, trains, etc. Suggestion: Use standard collocations such as 'public transport'.

× Many of these apps, umm, were very informative and entertaining.

✓ Many of these ads were very informative and entertaining.

'Apps' seems to be a slip; context refers to advertisements, so use 'ads' (or 'advertisements'). Also remove filler 'umm' for clarity. Suggestion: Replace incorrect word slips with the intended term and avoid filler words in formal speech.

× They made people's waiting, uh, a little bit fun.

✓ They made people's waiting a little more fun.

The phrase 'people's waiting' is awkward; use 'people's waiting' → 'waiting' as a noun phrase and 'a little more fun' is the natural comparative. Suggestion: Use natural expressions like 'made waiting more enjoyable' and avoid fillers.

× Yes, many, many advertisements are informative. And entertaining and interesting.

✓ Yes, many advertisements are informative, entertaining, and interesting.

Fragments and repetition: Combine the fragments into one sentence and remove redundant commas; use parallel structure for the list of adjectives. Suggestion: Use parallel structure and avoid short sentence fragments.

× I like analyzing the the slogans of the advertisement.

✓ I like analyzing the slogans of advertisements.

There is a repeated 'the the' and article misuse: 'the slogans of the advertisement' implies a single ad; use plural 'advertisements' for general statements and remove duplicate 'the.' Suggestion: Avoid article duplication and match singular/plural when generalizing.

× Yes, I like informated advertisements because they provide useful information and help me make sound decision.

✓ Yes, I like informative advertisements because they provide useful information and help me make sound decisions.

'Informated' is not a correct adjective; the correct form is 'informative.' Also 'decision' should be plural 'decisions' when speaking generally. Suggestion: Use correct adjective forms (informative) and pluralize countable nouns for general statements.

× For example, recent app a recent act about a iPhone Pro 17 explain its new features and I.

✓ For example, a recent ad about the iPhone Pro 17 explained its new features to me.

The original is garbled with wrong words ('app', 'act') and tense issues. Use 'a recent ad' (advertisement), correct article 'the iPhone Pro 17', and past simple 'explained' to describe that specific recent event. Finish the thought by specifying the effect 'to me.' Suggestion: Choose correct vocabulary (ad/advertisement), use articles correctly, and complete the sentence with a verb and object.

× Yes, I often see advertisements on on my cellphone or computer and they usually make me feel annoyed and frustrated because they interrupt whatever I'm doing.

✓ Yes, I often see advertisements on my cellphone or computer, and they usually make me feel annoyed and frustrated because they interrupt whatever I'm doing.

There is a duplicated preposition 'on on' and a missing comma before the coordinating conjunction 'and' for readability. Removing the duplicate fixes the error. Suggestion: Remove duplicate words and use commas to separate clauses for clarity.

× Resemble I often listen to a YouTube channel while driving but apps suddenly stop and distract me.

✓ For example, I often listen to a YouTube channel while driving, but ads suddenly stop and distract me.

'Resemble' is incorrect here; likely intended 'For example.' 'Apps' should be 'ads' given the context. Add a comma before 'but' and correct verbs to make a clear sentence. Suggestion: Use appropriate linking phrases like 'for example' and the correct noun 'ads' for advertisements.