Computers— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to make your response more natural and concise by directly answering the question with a clear topic sentence, followed by specific supporting details. Avoid redundancy and improve sentence structure.

Example: I usually use a computer when I want to play games because it runs them smoothly. However, I sometimes use my phone, but it can freeze or crash during gameplay.

Suggestion: Your answer lacks clarity and completeness. Try to form complete sentences and provide specific details. Start with a clear topic sentence and then add supporting information logically using linking words.

Example: The first time I used a computer was when I was a child. It wasn't my own computer but my father's, which he used for work. I was curious and started learning how to use it then.

Suggestion: Your answer is relevant but could be more concise and natural. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid redundancy. Also, try to use more precise vocabulary and sentence structures.

Example: I think I could manage without a computer because I usually use my iPhone and iPod to learn, search for information, and stay connected with others.

Suggestion: Your answer is repetitive and lacks fluency. Try to express your ideas clearly and avoid repeating words unnecessarily. Use linking words to make your answer coherent and provide specific details.

Example: It would be difficult for me to use a computer when there is no Wi-Fi available because I rely on the internet to do most tasks. Without connection, I can't access online resources or communicate effectively.

× While many people like me, I will use the computer when I playing the game because the computer normally can play well.

✓ While many people like me, I will use the computer when I am playing the game because the computer normally can play well.

The verb 'play' after 'I' needs to be in the present participle form 'playing' and requires the auxiliary verb 'am' to form the present continuous tense 'I am playing'. This is necessary to correctly express an action happening at the time.

× However, if we use the phone or IPI sometimes to stop or break sometimes.

✓ However, if we use the phone or iPad, sometimes it stops or breaks.

The pronoun 'I' is incorrectly used instead of 'iPad' or another device name. Also, the sentence structure is unclear; 'stop or break sometimes' should be rephrased to 'sometimes it stops or breaks' to clarify the subject and verb.

× Well, the first time when I use computer, it's when I was child and that that computer is not actually my computer, it's my daddy's computers and he is used for he was used for working and I.

✓ Well, the first time when I used a computer was when I was a child, and that computer was not actually mine; it was my daddy's computer, and he used it for working.

The verb 'use' should be in past tense 'used' to match the past time frame. 'Was child' needs the article 'a' to be 'was a child'. 'Is used' should be past tense 'used' to maintain consistency. Also, 'computers' should be singular 'computer' to match the context.

× Well, I personally think that it's not necessary for me to have a computer because I usually use iPods and iPhone to learn and to search the things as well as to stay connected with each other.

✓ Well, I personally think that it's not necessary for me to have a computer because I usually use iPods and iPhones to learn, to search for things, and to stay connected with others.

The plural form 'iPhones' is needed to match 'iPods'. 'Search the things' is incorrect; it should be 'search for things'. 'Stay connected with each other' is better expressed as 'stay connected with others' for clarity and correctness.

× Well, I would say when there's no Wi-Fi nearby me, so that I could not connect it with Wi-Fi and then I cannot go on on the Internet.

✓ Well, I would say when there's no Wi-Fi near me, I cannot connect to Wi-Fi and then I cannot go on the Internet.

The phrase 'nearby me' is incorrect; 'near me' is the correct prepositional phrase. 'Connect it with Wi-Fi' should be 'connect to Wi-Fi' as 'connect to' is the correct collocation. Also, the repeated 'on' is a typographical error.

× So I would therefore I, I, I would not, I cannot do anything.

✓ So, therefore, I cannot do anything.

The sentence contains redundant and repeated words which disrupt the sentence structure. Simplifying to 'So, therefore, I cannot do anything.' makes the sentence clear and grammatically correct.