Bike— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more accurate with tense and reduce hesitations. Start with a clear topic sentence in past tense, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid filler words (uh, um) and repetition. Aim for natural, concise sentences (max 5).

Example: I had a small bicycle that my parents gave me for my sixth birthday. I often used it to ride to my friends’ houses and sometimes joined informal races with neighbourhood children, which helped me become more confident cycling.

Suggestion: Give a direct opinion first, then support it with specific reasons and examples. Use clearer sentences and correct grammar (plural/singular, word order). Avoid repeating words and fillers. Use linking words like 'because', 'for example', or 'however' to organize ideas.

Example: Yes, I think bicycles are very popular in my country because many students and low-income workers cannot afford cars and rely on bikes for daily commuting. For example, I often see students cycling to school and markets crowded with people riding inexpensive bicycles.

× Yes, I have a small bicycle which I got from my parents on my 6th birthday.

✓ Yes, I had a small bicycle which I got from my parents on my 6th birthday.

The question asks about having a bike when the student was a child (past). The original sentence uses 'have' (present), causing a tense mismatch. Use past 'had' to match the past time frame. Suggestion: keep past tense throughout when talking about childhood events.

× So I use that bike, uh, to go off, uh, to go back or to meet my friends, uh, like far to do far to umm, uh, do a race like as a competition during childhood.

✓ So I used that bike to go out, to go back, or to meet my friends, and sometimes to take part in races or competitions during my childhood.

Multiple errors: tense should be past ('used' not 'use'), informal filler words removed, 'go off' is incorrect here so replace with 'go out', repetition 'to do far to' is unclear and corrected to 'to meet my friends', and 'do a race like as a competition' is ungrammatical; use 'take part in races or competitions'. Suggestions: avoid fillers, use clear verbs ('go out', 'meet'), and maintain past tense for childhood activities.

× Uh, I guess bikes are very popular in my country because, uh, especially students and worker who cannot afford their personal, uh, cars, uh, they use, uh, car, they use their, uh, bicycles or, uh, bikes for, to, uh, commute to commute for study purpose or to work there for cars are, uh, very popular in.

✓ I guess bikes are very popular in my country because especially students and workers who cannot afford personal cars use bicycles to commute for study or work, whereas cars are also very popular.

Errors corrected: 'worker' should be plural 'workers' to agree with 'students' and the plural subject; 'their personal cars' simplified to 'personal cars'; redundant fragments and repetitions removed (e.g., 'they use, uh, car, they use their'); 'commute to commute' fixed to 'use bicycles to commute'; 'for study purpose' changed to 'for study or work' and natural phrasing added; final clause reworded to 'whereas cars are also very popular' to be grammatical. Suggestions: ensure plural agreement, avoid repeating words, and use concise structures for contrast ('whereas').

× ...students and worker who cannot afford their personal, uh, cars...

✓ ...students and workers who cannot afford personal cars...

Pronoun 'their' is unnecessary with 'personal cars' here and 'worker' must be plural 'workers' to match 'students'. Use 'personal cars' without 'their' for cleaner phrasing. Suggestion: keep number agreement and omit redundant possessive when meaning is clear.