Tidiness— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Overall strong answer: clear topic sentence, relevant example, and good coherence. To improve: reduce filler words (uh), avoid redundancy (e.g. 'work and study'), and tighten sentence length to stay within five sentences. Add a linking word to connect reason and example more smoothly (e.g. 'therefore' or 'so'). Also vary vocabulary slightly (use 'concentrate' or 'be productive').

Example: Yes, I enjoy keeping things tidy because it helps me concentrate. For example, when my desk is organized, I can find items quickly and therefore stay focused on my work. As a result, I am more productive and less distracted.

Suggestion: Answer has a clear topic but is weakened by frequent hesitations, repetition, and an incomplete ending. To improve: remove fillers, avoid repeating phrases, complete the final thought, and add a specific example or brief detail about what you did (e.g. made the bed, put toys in boxes). Use a linking word such as 'because' or 'so' to show cause.

Example: Yes, I did. My mother was very tidy and taught me to put things away every day, so I learned to make my bed and store toys in boxes. Because of her habits, I often organized my books and clothes neatly when I was a child.

Suggestion: Good structure with topic sentence and methods, but some grammar issues (plural/singular agreement, 'different sections' vs 'different sections for my items'), repetition ('each' twice), and an unfinished final sentence. To improve: correct articles and plurals, combine similar ideas to avoid redundancy, use linking words (for example, 'then' or 'after that'), and finish the result clause (e.g. 'so that I can find them easily').

Example: First, I divide my desk into sections for books, stationery, and other items. Then I always return things to their designated places after use, so I can find them easily and keep my space clutter-free.

Suggestion: The answer states opinion and gives reason, which is good, but is hindered by fillers, grammar errors ('a super important', 'it help'), awkward phrasing ('we don't are not extracting'), and redundancy. To improve: remove fillers, correct grammar (subject-verb agreement), use precise vocabulary (e.g. 'stationery' singular/uncountable), and finish with a clear result. Add a linking word like 'therefore' to connect reason and example.

Example: Yes, I think tidiness is necessary because it helps people feel comfortable and focused. For instance, when a workspace is organized, you save time looking for stationery and therefore can concentrate on the task.

× Yes, obviously I love to clean up and keep my space, uh, tidy so I feel comfortable and focused.

✓ Yes, obviously I love to clean up and keep my space tidy so I feel comfortable and focused.

The original sentence had no grammatical pronoun error but contained an unnecessary comma before 'tidy' and filler 'uh'. Removing the comma and filler improves flow. Suggestion: avoid unnecessary pauses and punctuation that interrupt the sentence.

× For example, when my desk is organized, I don't have to spend too much time finding things and nothing can distract me, and I can work and study more effectively.

✓ For example, when my desk is organized, I don't have to spend too much time finding things; nothing distracts me, and I can work and study more effectively.

The original used a negative plus 'nothing can distract me' which is acceptable but the clause ordering and conjunctions made the sentence slightly awkward. Replacing with a semicolon and active present tense 'nothing distracts me' creates clearer coordination. Suggestion: keep parallel structure and prefer active verbs.

× My mom was, uh, my mom is a tidy person.

✓ My mom is a tidy person.

The sentence mixed past and present ('was' then 'is'). If referring to her habitual characteristic now and in the past, use consistent present tense: 'is a tidy person.' Suggestion: choose tense that matches the time frame and avoid repeating the subject.

× She taught me to clean up everything and, uh, uh, encouraged me to keep my space tidy all the time.

✓ She taught me to clean up everything and encouraged me to keep my space tidy all the time.

Redundant fillers 'uh' interrupt the coordinated verbs and comma placement is unnecessary. The two verbs 'taught' and 'encouraged' are correctly coordinated; remove fillers and extra commas. Suggestion: omit filler words and place conjunctions without extra commas.

× That's why when I was a child, I tried to, uh, organize, uh, all of my stuff.

✓ That's why when I was a child, I tried to organize all of my stuff.

The original had unnecessary fillers and commas interrupting the verb phrase. 'Tried to organize' is correct. Suggestion: remove filler sounds and keep infinitive intact.

× I tried to put things in the right positions so that I can work and.

✓ I tried to put things in the right places so that I could work effectively.

The original sentence is incomplete and mixes past attempt ('tried') with present 'can'. Use past ability 'could' to match 'tried' and complete the sentence; also 'positions' is awkward—use 'places'. Suggestion: ensure clause completion and tense consistency.

× First of all I have a different sections for each of my stuff.

✓ First of all, I have different sections for each type of my stuff.

Original had a number agreement error: 'a different sections' mixes singular 'a' with plural 'sections'. Remove 'a' and adjust noun phrase for clarity ('each type of my stuff'). Suggestion: ensure determiners agree with noun number.

× I have a space for books, for toys, for stationery and also I tried to have each designated area for each kind of item.

✓ I have a space for books, toys, and stationery, and I try to have a designated area for each kind of item.

Original used past 'tried' inconsistently with habitual present; use present 'try' to describe regular practice. Also simplify repeated 'for'. Suggestion: use parallel lists and consistent tense.

× Also after I use anything I try to put them in the original place so that.

✓ Also, after I use anything, I try to put it back in its original place so that things stay organized.

Original had incomplete sentence ending and plural mismatch ('anything' singular but 'them' plural). Change to singular 'it' and add possessive 'its' and finish the purpose clause. Suggestion: match pronoun number to antecedent and complete thought.

× Yes, I believe so. Uh, keeping things umm, tidy and clean is a super important for everyone because uh, it help us feel comfortable and focused.

✓ Yes, I believe so. Keeping things tidy and clean is very important for everyone because it helps us feel comfortable and focused.

Errors: unnecessary article 'a' before 'super important' and incorrect modifier 'super' in formal context; verb agreement 'it help' should be 'it helps'. Remove fillers and use 'very important'. Suggestion: ensure subject-verb agreement and choose appropriate modifiers.

× For example, when our space is organized, we don't have to spend too much time uh, finding things or finding the stationaries we need and we don't are not extracting.

✓ For example, when our space is organized, we don't have to spend too much time finding things or the stationery we need, and we are not distracted.

Multiple issues: 'stationeries' is incorrect plural—use 'stationery' as an uncountable noun; 'we don't are not extracting' is ungrammatical—intended 'we are not distracted'. Clean up fillers. Suggestion: use correct uncountable nouns and correct passive/adjective 'distracted'.