Work— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Your answer is relevant but could be more direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence directly answering the question, then add brief supporting details. Avoid unnecessary phrases like "Currently I'm on a work permit" unless it directly relates to the question.

Example: I am currently working as a security guard for VP Protection in Toronto. This job has helped me develop important skills like communication and problem-solving.

Suggestion: Your answer is informative but could be improved by correcting grammar and using linking words to connect ideas smoothly. Also, avoid vague phrases like "and so on"; be specific instead.

Example: I have been working as a security guard with VP Protection in Toronto for several years. I enjoy my job because it has helped me improve my communication, problem-solving, and conflict resolution skills.

Suggestion: Try to reduce filler words like "uh" and "umm" to make your speech clearer. Use linking words such as "because" and "as well as" effectively, and complete your sentences fully. Also, improve sentence structure for clarity.

Example: It is a very good place to work because I meet new people and learn about different cultures and historical backgrounds. Additionally, it helps me improve my communication skills, allowing me to listen carefully to others.

Suggestion: Avoid repeating words and improve grammar, such as subject-verb agreement. Use linking words to connect ideas and provide more specific details to support your opinion.

Example: Honestly, I really like the place where I work because during my shifts, I meet people from various cultures and backgrounds, which makes the job interesting and enjoyable.

Suggestion: Your answer is unclear and contains filler words. Try to express your ideas clearly and use complete sentences. Provide more specific details about your future plans and avoid vague phrases like "when I'm freeze."

Example: Although the future is uncertain, I hope to become the owner of a security company. I have discussed this goal with my parents and am working towards gaining the necessary experience.

× I have been employed as a security guard with VP Protection in Toronto for the past years.

✓ I have been employed as a security guard with VP Protection in Toronto for the past few years.

The phrase 'for the past years' is incomplete and needs a quantifier like 'few' to specify the duration. This is a present tense usage issue as it relates to expressing time duration correctly.

× I really enjoying my job because it helped me to enhance my communication skills, my problem solving skills, conflict resolution and so on.

✓ I really enjoy my job because it helps me to enhance my communication skills, my problem-solving skills, conflict resolution and so on.

The verb 'enjoying' is incorrectly used here; the correct form is the base verb 'enjoy' after 'I really'. Also, the tense should be present to match the ongoing nature of the job. 'Helped' should be 'helps' to maintain present tense consistency.

× I meet with new people, get to know about the different cultures, historical backgrounds, as well as it helps to enhance my communication skills so I can easily, umm, listen other people what they want to say and.

✓ I meet new people, get to know different cultures and historical backgrounds, and it helps to enhance my communication skills so I can easily listen to other people and understand what they want to say.

The preposition 'with' after 'meet' is unnecessary; 'meet new people' is correct. 'Get to know about' should be 'get to know' without 'about'. Also, 'listen other people' requires the preposition 'to'. The sentence was incomplete and needed restructuring for clarity.

× Try to be honest, I really like the place where I work because during during my shift hours I meet a different type of people who belongs from the different cultures historical backgrounds.

✓ To be honest, I really like the place where I work because during my shift hours I meet different types of people who belong to different cultures and historical backgrounds.

The phrase 'Try to be honest' is incorrect; it should be 'To be honest'. 'A different type of people' should be 'different types of people' to agree in number. 'Who belongs from' should be 'who belong to' to correctly use the pronoun and preposition.

× Future is not predictable, but yes, uh, sometimes when I'm freeze I discuss with my parents that I want to become a security company owner, so.

✓ The future is not predictable, but yes, sometimes when I am free, I discuss with my parents that I want to become a security company owner.

'I'm freeze' is incorrect; it should be 'I am free' to express availability or time. The modal verb 'can' or 'will' is not explicitly needed here, but the sentence needed correction for proper verb form and clarity. Also, 'Future' needs the definite article 'The'.