Work— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Your answer is informative but a bit long and has some grammatical errors. Try to make your sentences shorter and more natural. For example, use 'I recently graduated from high school and now I am a first-year bachelor student. I am also preparing to study abroad.'

Example: I recently graduated from high school and now I am a first-year bachelor student. I am also preparing to study abroad.

Suggestion: Your answer is unclear and grammatically incorrect. Instead, say 'I work as a barista, but it's an unpaid internship.' This is more natural and concise.

Example: I work as a barista, but it's an unpaid internship.

Suggestion: Your answer is good but incomplete and has some redundancy. Try to finish your thoughts and avoid repeating words. For example, 'Yes, it's a great place to work because I gain valuable experience preparing different types of coffee and improving my customer service skills. This internship also helps me understand the work environment better.'

Example: Yes, it's a great place to work because I gain valuable experience preparing different types of coffee and improving my customer service skills. This internship also helps me understand the work environment better.

Suggestion: Your answer has unclear words and some mistakes. For example, 'bitter' and 'Differ label' do not fit here. Instead, say 'Yes, I love the place where I work because the environment is peaceful and friendly. I enjoy interacting with customers, and it has built my confidence in different areas.'

Example: Yes, I love the place where I work because the environment is peaceful and friendly. I enjoy interacting with customers, and it has built my confidence in different areas.

Suggestion: Your answer is understandable but has grammatical errors and redundancy. Try to say, 'I have several future work plans, but I am especially interested in becoming a makeup artist. It has been one of my biggest dreams, and I will be very happy if I succeed.'

Example: I have several future work plans, but I am especially interested in becoming a makeup artist. It has been one of my biggest dreams, and I will be very happy if I succeed.

× I'm a student, I recently graduate my high school in 2024 and I'm currently a student studying in bachelor first year, giving my best in study and furthermore I'm also preparing to study abroad.

✓ I'm a student, I recently graduated from high school in 2024 and I'm currently a first-year bachelor student, giving my best in my studies and furthermore I'm also preparing to study abroad.

The verb 'graduate' should be in the past tense 'graduated' because the action happened in the past. Also, 'graduate' requires the preposition 'from' before the institution. 'Bachelor first year' is better expressed as 'first-year bachelor student' for clarity and correctness. 'Giving my best in study' should be 'giving my best in my studies' to use the correct noun form and possessive pronoun.

× I recently graduate my high school in 2024

✓ I recently graduated from high school in 2024

The verb 'graduate' requires the preposition 'from' before the institution. Also, 'my high school' is better as 'high school' unless specifying a particular school.

× I'm currently a student studying in bachelor first year

✓ I'm currently a first-year bachelor student

The phrase 'bachelor first year' is awkward; 'first-year bachelor student' is the correct order and form to express the idea.

× I work in barista

✓ I work as a barista

The correct preposition to describe a job role is 'as', not 'in'. 'Barista' is a job title, so 'as a barista' is correct.

× it's not really a work because I don't get money working there

✓ it's not really work because I don't get paid working there

'Work' is an uncountable noun here, so 'a work' is incorrect. Also, 'get money' is better expressed as 'get paid' when referring to earning money from a job.

× It is really a better place to work

✓ It is really a good place to work

'Better' is a comparative adjective and requires a comparison object. Without comparison, 'good' is appropriate.

× improving my customer service services skills

✓ improving my customer service skills

The phrase 'customer service services skills' is redundant and incorrect. 'Customer service skills' is the correct form.

× This internship helps me understand the work environment better and.

✓ This internship helps me understand the work environment better.

The sentence ends with 'and' which is incomplete and incorrect. Removing 'and' completes the sentence properly.

× the environment here is really peaceful and bitter

✓ the environment here is really peaceful and pleasant

'Bitter' is not appropriate to describe an environment; 'pleasant' or 'nice' fits better.

× It has built my confidence in Differ label

✓ It has built my confidence in different areas

'Differ label' is unclear and likely incorrect. 'Different areas' or 'different aspects' is a better expression.

× There are several future works plans I do have

✓ There are several future work plans I have

'Works plans' is incorrect; 'work plans' is the correct plural form.

× Being a makeup artist was really my one of the biggest dream

✓ Being a makeup artist was really one of my biggest dreams

The article 'a' before 'one of the biggest dream' is incorrect. Also, 'dream' should be plural 'dreams'.

× I will be over the moon if I success in this future work plans

✓ I will be over the moon if I succeed in these future work plans

'Success' is a noun; the verb form 'succeed' is needed here. Also, 'this' should be 'these' to agree with plural 'plans'.