购物— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Shorten and structure the answer: start with a clear topic sentence (Yes/No + brief reason), then add one or two specific supporting details. Remove redundancy and avoid overly long subordinate clauses. Use linking words like "because" or "however" to connect ideas.

範例: Yes, I enjoy shopping, but I'm not a shopaholic because I try to control my spending. For example, when I visit boutiques or makeup stores, I remind myself of my budget and only buy items I really need, so I avoid wasteful purchases.

建議: Complete the answer and make it coherent: give a clear topic sentence, then explain the change and give a specific example. Use linking words like "although" and "nowadays". Avoid leaving sentences unfinished.

範例: Although I used to find price comparison annoying, I now compare prices more often. For instance, I check online and visit two or three stores before buying electronics, because this helps me save money and find better deals.

建議: Keep the answer concise and add a specific strategy you use to decide. Start with a direct topic sentence, then give one clear reason and one concrete example or strategy. Use linking words like "because" and "so" to clarify.

範例: Yes, I often struggle to choose because I want to have both options. To manage this, I set a rule: I pick the item I will use most often, or I wait 24 hours before deciding, which helps me avoid impulse purchases.

建議: Finish your thought and use precise vocabulary. Start with a balanced topic sentence (not always), then give a reason and a specific example where price does not equal quality. Avoid filler words like "uh" and incomplete sentences.

範例: I don't think expensive products are always better, but often they offer higher quality because manufacturers use better materials and stricter quality control. However, I once bought an expensive charger that failed quickly, while a cheaper, well-reviewed brand lasted much longer, so I now read reviews before assuming price equals quality.

× I do like shopping, but I wouldn't consider myself a shopaholic because every time I step into a boutique or a shop that sells makeup products, I would try my very best to restrain myself not to spend too much money because it would be so wasteful.

✓ I do like shopping, but I wouldn't consider myself a shopaholic because every time I step into a boutique or a shop that sells makeup products, I try my very best to restrain myself from spending too much money because it would be so wasteful.

The phrase 'would try my very best to restrain myself not to spend' is awkward and ungrammatical. After 'restrain myself' use a preposition plus gerund: 'restrain myself from spending'. Use present simple 'try' (habitual action) rather than 'would try' which can imply conditional or repeated past; present simple fits the general habit described. Suggestion: Use 'restrain myself from spending' and 'I try' for habitual actions.

× My mother always tells me to compare prices when I shop but I refuse to listen to her because I think it's so annoying to step into every store and remember the price. But nowadays I try to do so because it's actually been.

✓ My mother always tells me to compare prices when I shop, but I used to refuse to listen to her because I thought it was so annoying to go into every store and remember the price. Nowadays I try to do so because it's actually helpful.

Original contains tense inconsistency and an unfinished clause ('it's actually been') that makes the sentence incomplete. Also 'refuse' (present) conflicts with 'nowadays I try' suggesting a change; use 'used to refuse' and 'thought' to show past habit and opinion. 'Step into' is acceptable but 'go into' is more natural here. Complete the idea by replacing the unfinished 'it's actually been' with a clear adjective like 'helpful'. Suggestion: Make past habits clear with 'used to' and complete thoughts; avoid leaving sentences unfinished.

× Yes, I always find it hard to make choices when I shop because I have this belief that if I can own both of them, why should I just buy only one of them? But yeah, I've been learning and trying really hard to restrain myself.

✓ Yes, I always find it hard to make choices when I shop because I have this belief that if I can own both of them, why should I buy just one? But I've been learning and trying really hard to restrain myself.

Redundancy and word order issues: 'why should I just buy only one of them' is redundant ('just' and 'only' together). Better: 'why should I buy just one?' Use contraction 'I've' is fine; keep present perfect continuous 'I've been learning' for an ongoing change. Also 'buy just one' places 'just' before the element it modifies. Suggestion: Remove redundant words and place adverbs correctly ('just buy one').

× In most cases, I think expensive products have better quality than cheaper ones because, uh, the producers, they do have to incorporate expenses, more expenses to produce high quality products and that's why they.

✓ In most cases, I think expensive products have better quality than cheaper ones because the producers have to incur higher expenses to produce high-quality products, and that's why they cost more.

Problems: 'incorporate expenses' is incorrect collocation; the correct verb is 'incur' expenses. 'More expenses' should be 'higher expenses' or 'greater costs'. The original ends incomplete ('and that's why they.')—complete idea: 'that's why they cost more.' Also remove unnecessary filler 'uh' and redundant subject 'the producers, they'. Use hyphen in 'high-quality'. Suggestion: Use correct collocations ('incur expenses' or 'have higher costs') and complete the sentence with the intended result ('they cost more').