自行车— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Clarify and correct minor errors, reduce redundancy, use linking words and more precise vocabulary. Begin with a clear topic sentence, then add concise supporting detail(s) with linking words. Correct tense and word choice mistakes (e.g., 'write' → 'ride', 'as quick as' → 'as quickly as', 'determined to get up' → 'was determined to get up'). Limit to around 3–4 sentences.

範例: Yes, I did. I used to ride my bike every weekend with my grandmother, and I was eager to ride as quickly as the older kids, so I often fell off. However, I was determined to get back up, and with regular practice I improved quickly.

建議: Make the answer more specific and coherent by using linking words and avoiding repetition. Start with a clear opinion, then add specific supporting details (where, who, when) and briefly explain why. Replace vague phrases like 'every day, every Saturday and Sunday' with precise time expressions and use varied vocabulary (e.g., 'popular for recreation and commuting').

範例: Yes, they are quite popular, especially for recreation. For example, many residents ride bicycles in city parks on weekends, and some people also cycle to work because cycling is an affordable and healthy form of exercise.

× I remember I was quite reckless that I wanted to write as quick as the older kids, so I fell off.

✓ I remember I was quite reckless and wanted to ride as quickly as the older kids, so I fell off.

The original sentence has multiple problems: 'that' is incorrectly used to connect the idea (sentence structure error) and 'write' is the wrong verb; context requires 'ride' (vocabulary). Also 'as quick as' should use the adverb 'as quickly as' to modify the verb 'ride'. The corrected sentence uses the past tense consistently and proper adverb form. Suggestion: use 'and' to connect clauses, use the correct verb ('ride'), and use adverb 'quickly' for manner.

× But I did not give up and determined to get up and keep practicing.

✓ But I did not give up; I was determined to get up and keep practicing.

The clause 'and determined to get up' lacks an explicit verb for the subject and so is a sentence structure problem. 'Determined' is an adjective that needs a linking verb (was) or a participle structure ('and determined to' is acceptable with subject repeated). The corrected sentence supplies the past-tense linking verb 'was' to match the surrounding past narrative. Suggestion: ensure each clause has a verb or use parallel structure (e.g. 'I did not give up and (I) was determined...').

× I live in Hong Kong and every day, every Saturday and Sunday, many people ride their bikes in the park and I think exercising is a big thing in Hong Kong.

✓ I live in Hong Kong, and every day, including Saturdays and Sundays, many people ride their bikes in the park. I think exercising is a big part of life in Hong Kong.

The original sentence has awkward repetition and slight misuse of time expressions ('every day, every Saturday and Sunday' is redundant) and an informal phrase 'a big thing'. This is mainly a present tense and sentence structure issue: split into two sentences for clarity and use 'including' to clarify time. Also replace 'a big thing' with 'a big part of life' for natural phrasing. Suggestion: avoid redundancy in time expressions and use clearer, idiomatic phrases.