音乐— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Simplifique a gramática e corrija pequenos erros (por exemplo, "depends of" → "depends on"). Seja mais conciso e use ligações claras entre ideias (por exemplo, "however" ou "on the other hand"). Mantenha-se dentro de 3–4 frases claras: uma frase-tópico e 1–2 frases de apoio com exemplos concretos.

範例: It depends on my mood. When I want to relax or celebrate, I listen to happy songs to lift my spirits. On the other hand, when I feel sad, I choose slower, sad songs because they help me process my emotions.

建議: Corrija erros gramaticais e de collocation (por exemplo, "a fail a test" → "fail a test" or "fail an exam"). Evite repetições e torne o exemplo mais direto e relevante. Use uma construção com linking word como "for example" de forma mais fluida.

範例: Yes, it does. Happy music often cheers me up and boosts my energy. For example, after a bad day at work or a failed exam, I open Spotify and play upbeat songs I used to enjoy to improve my mood.

建議: Corrija a gramática verbal e a escolha de tempos (por exemplo, "I've never been taking" → "I never took"; "I have attempt" → "I attempted" or "I tried"). Seja preciso e conciso, com uma frase-tópico e uma frase de apoio que explique brevemente a experiência e resultado.

範例: No, I never took music classes as a child. I did try to learn the piano on my own, but I struggled with practice and eventually gave up.

建議: Melhore a clareza e corrija a estrutura (por exemplo, remova "when I'm doing it" e corrija frases como "doing up and now an ordinary activity"). Use linking words para ligar ideias ("Also", "for example"). Seja específico sobre como a música ajuda (ritmo, concentração, humor).

範例: Yes, I often listen to music while doing household chores or working. For example, upbeat playlists help me stay focused and make boring tasks feel faster and more enjoyable.

× I think it depends of the situation that I'm in.

✓ I think it depends on the situation I'm in.

Use 'depend on' not 'depend of'. The correct preposition after 'depend' is 'on'. Remove the unnecessary 'that' to make the sentence more natural.

× Sometimes when I'm feeling a little bit overwhelmed and I would like to enjoy the moment, I just play happy songs.

✓ Sometimes when I'm feeling a little bit overwhelmed and would like to enjoy the moment, I just play happy songs.

The sentence is grammatical but wordy: remove the second subject 'I' before 'would' to avoid repetition and improve fluency. This is a sentence structure/conjunction smoothing issue.

× But there are times that I'm feeling a little bit down that I just prefer to play sad songs to get used to the environment.

✓ But there are times when I'm feeling a little bit down and I prefer to play sad songs to match the mood.

Use 'times when' rather than 'times that' for referring to moments. 'To get used to the environment' is odd here; replace with 'to match the mood' for clarity and naturalness.

× There are times, for example, that when I didn't have a good time at work or a fail a test, I just go on Spotify and play old songs to cheer me up.

✓ There are times, for example, when I haven't had a good time at work or have failed a test, I just go on Spotify and play old songs to cheer myself up.

Use present perfect ('haven't had') to refer to recent experiences affecting the present. 'a fail a test' is incorrect: use 'have failed a test'. Pronoun 'me' should be reflexive 'myself' after 'cheer'.

× Unfortunately, I've never been taking any music classes when I was a child.

✓ Unfortunately, I never took any music classes when I was a child.

Do not mix present perfect progressive with a past time expression ('when I was a child'). Use simple past 'took' for completed past actions.

× However, I have attempt to practice piano but I failed most of the times.

✓ However, I attempted to practice the piano but I failed most of the time.

Use past simple 'attempted' for a past action. Include article 'the' with 'piano' commonly in English. 'Most of the times' should be 'most of the time'.

× I believe that listening to music when I'm doing it, household chores or any task at work can improve my time and make me feel more positive while I'm doing a very boring task.

✓ I believe that listening to music while I'm doing household chores or tasks at work can improve my time and make me feel more positive during boring activities.

Remove redundant 'when I'm doing it' and reorder list: 'while I'm doing household chores or tasks at work' is natural. 'Improve my time' is unclear; keep 'improve my mood' or 'make tasks feel quicker'—here use 'improve my time' kept but better to say 'make tasks feel quicker'.

× In that way, I can easily be cheered up while I'm doing up and now an ordinary activity.

✓ In that way, I can easily be cheered up while I'm doing an ordinary activity now and then.

Phrase 'doing up and now' is incorrect. Use 'now and then' for 'occasionally'. Place 'an ordinary activity' before the time expression. This fixes preposition and phrase order errors.