音乐— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Réduisez les hésitations et structurez la réponse en une ou deux phrases claires : commencez par une phrase thème qui répond directement à la question, puis ajoutez une phrase avec des détails précis. Évitez les mots de remplissage (« umm », « uh ») et remplacez-les par de courtes pauses. Par exemple, précisez quels genres ou artistes vous écoutez quand vous êtes heureux ou triste pour rendre la réponse plus spécifique.

範例: I prefer both happy and sad music depending on my mood. For example, when I’m happy I like upbeat pop songs by artists like Dua Lipa, while when I’m sad I often listen to mellow acoustic ballads to relax.

建議: Clarifiez vos idées et utilisez un vocabulaire précis plutôt que des expressions vagues ou incorrectes (par ex. « creates dopamine in me » est informel et inexact). Donnez une concise cause-conséquence avec un mot de liaison (therefore, so) et évitez la redondance. Détaillez une situation concrète où la musique vous motive.

範例: Yes, definitely. Happy music boosts my mood and energy, so I can stay focused and motivated while working. For instance, upbeat tracks help me finish household chores faster and feel more confident when meeting friends.

建議: Utilisez le temps verbal approprié pour parler du passé et éliminez hésitations. Commencez par une phrase simple au passé (I took...), puis ajoutez un détail précis (quels instruments, combien d’années, un souvenir). Remplacez « interesting » par un complément précis (classmates, teachers) et montrez un résultat concret.

範例: Yes, I took several music classes as a child. For example, I studied piano for four years and attended dance lessons, which helped me gain confidence and make close friends at school.

建議: Raccourcissez et clarifiez la réponse en une ou deux phrases, utilisez des mots précis pour les tâches (washing the dishes, doing laundry) et une conséquence claire (I finish faster, I enjoy it). Évitez de laisser la phrase inachevée et terminez par un résultat concret.

範例: Yes, I often listen to music while doing housework. For instance, I turn up upbeat songs when washing the dishes or doing laundry because it makes the tasks more enjoyable and I finish them more quickly.

× Actually, I prefer both because it depends on my mood.

✓ Actually, I prefer both because it depends on my mood.

No correction needed; sentence uses present simple appropriately to express a general preference and condition.

× When I'm happy, I would like to umm, listen to the upbeat songs, but when I feel like, uh, heartbreak or when I'm in a bad mood, I would like to listen to sad songs.

✓ When I'm happy, I like to listen to upbeat songs, but when I feel heartbroken or I'm in a bad mood, I like to listen to sad songs.

The original uses 'would like to' inconsistently for habitual preferences; for general habits use present simple ('I like to'). 'Feel like heartbreak' is incorrect; use adjective 'heartbroken'. Also drop the article before 'upbeat songs' when speaking generally.

× Yes definitely. I think happy music creates umm dopamine in me so that I can have a lot of energy to complete my task or have more energy to socialize with everyone in my life.

✓ Yes, definitely. I think happy music creates dopamine in me, so I have more energy to complete tasks or to socialize with people in my life.

Use present simple for general truths ('I think', 'creates'). 'Can have' is unnecessary; 'I have' is natural. 'Complete my task' should be pluralized to 'tasks' for general reference. 'Everyone in my life' is better as 'people in my life'.

× I think I cannot live without music, especially the happy 1.

✓ I think I cannot live without music, especially happy music.

Using 'the happy 1' is incorrect and informal. Replace with 'happy music'. The definite article 'the' is not needed when speaking generally.

× Yes, when I was a child, I was really extrovert and I, umm, take part in a lot of music classes from piano to the dance class.

✓ Yes, when I was a child, I was really extroverted and I took part in a lot of music classes, from piano to dance classes.

'Extrovert' is a noun; use adjective 'extroverted'. Past time 'when I was a child' requires past tense 'took part' not present 'take part'. Use plural 'dance classes' and remove unnecessary article.

× I was always like working with music because it boosts my energy and it helps me to make friends with a lot of, uh, interesting.

✓ I was always into working with music because it boosted my energy and helped me make friends with many interesting people.

'Was always like' is informal and ungrammatical; use 'was always into' or 'always liked'. Maintain past tense 'boosted' and 'helped' to match 'was'. 'Make friends with a lot of interesting' is incomplete; add 'people'.

× Yes, definitely, and it's a great way to like not get bored because there are a lot of housework like umm, doing washing the dishes or doing the laundry that is so boring.

✓ Yes, definitely, and it's a great way not to get bored because there is a lot of housework, like washing the dishes or doing the laundry, which is so boring.

Use infinitive 'not to get bored' rather than 'to like not get bored'. 'Housework' is uncountable, so use 'there is a lot of housework'. Correct verb forms: 'washing the dishes' and 'doing the laundry'. Use 'which is' to refer to the preceding activities.

× So I turn up my favorite songs and just stand and vibe with the song and it's become.

✓ So I turn up my favorite songs and just stand and vibe to the music, and it lifts my mood.

Ending 'it's become' is incomplete and ungrammatical. Replace with a complete result clause such as 'it lifts my mood' or 'it makes the chores more enjoyable'. Use 'vibe to the music' or 'vibe with the song' consistently.