音乐— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Make your answer more concise and fluent, reduce hesitations and filler words, and use clearer grammar. Start with a direct topic sentence, then add one specific example to support it. Use linking words like "however" or "also" for contrast.

範例: I usually choose music based on my mood. For example, when I'm happy I listen to upbeat pop songs to boost my energy; however, when I'm sad I prefer slow, soulful music because it helps me reflect and feel comforted.

建議: Avoid repetition and correct basic grammar. Give a clear topic sentence then one or two concise reasons with a linking word. Replace vague phrases with specific descriptions of feelings or effects.

範例: Yes, happy music definitely makes me more excited. For instance, upbeat songs increase my energy and make me want to move, so I often feel more motivated and cheerful after listening to them.

建議: Organize your answer with a clear main point, then give specific supporting details and use correct grammar. Reduce filler sounds and avoid unnecessary repetition. Mention one concrete example (e.g. platform or type of online practice).

範例: Not formally. I live in a small city where there are no local music teachers, so I sometimes learn through online tutorials on YouTube. However, I couldn't follow a full course because of my busy work schedule, although I encourage my children to take regular online lessons.

建議: Make sentences fluent and grammatical, and give one clear example with linking words. Avoid short fragments and correct tense/word order errors. Replace vague phrases like "break that silence" with a smoother expression.

範例: Yes, I often listen to music while doing other activities. For example, I play lively songs while cooking to make the task more enjoyable, and I choose energetic tracks when I exercise to keep my motivation high.

× It's, it depends on my mood, the kind of music I need to choose.

✓ It depends on my mood and the kind of music I need to choose.

Original has an unnecessary 'It's,' and uses commas incorrectly, creating a comma splice and awkward phrasing. Remove 'It's,' join clauses with 'and' to make a single clear sentence. Use 'depends on' with subject 'It'.

× When I am happy, I always go for some uplifting beats to uh, increase the enthusiasm and encourage uh, And when I am having a sad uh, moment, I'll always inclined toward a soulful moment to support me in that particular situation.

✓ When I am happy, I always choose uplifting beats to increase my enthusiasm, and when I am having a sad moment, I am always inclined toward soulful music to support me.

Multiple problems: unnecessary filler words, inconsistent verb forms ('I'll always inclined' is ungrammatical), and wrong noun choices ('soulful moment' should be 'soulful music'). Remove fillers, use parallel structure, correct verb forms ('am always inclined' or 'always feel inclined'), and replace 'moment' with 'music' for clarity.

× Definitely an uplifting music, just help me to feel more happy and enthusiastic uh via and uh.

✓ Definitely uplifting music just helps me feel happier and more enthusiastic.

'An uplifting music' is incorrect because 'music' is uncountable and does not take 'an'. Verb agreement: 'just help' should be 'just helps' because subject 'music' is singular/uncountable. Use comparative 'happier' and include 'more' with 'enthusiastic'. Remove fillers.

× I feel like my happiness just compounded by listening a good music.

✓ I feel like my happiness is just compounded by listening to good music.

Missing auxiliary 'is' for passive present participle ('compounded'). Also 'listening a good music' is incorrect: use 'listening to good music' and remove 'a' before uncountable 'music'.

× I can feel the more energetic vibes in me and also feel a happy.

✓ I can feel more energetic vibes in me and also feel happy.

'The more energetic' is unnecessary; use 'more energetic' without 'the'. 'Feel a happy' is incorrect because 'happy' is an adjective and does not take the article 'a'. Use 'feel happy'.

× Not really, I'm living in a small city so music classes are hardly possible here.

✓ Not really. I live in a small city, so music classes are hardly available here.

Use simple present 'I live' for a general state rather than present continuous 'I'm living'. 'Hardly possible' is awkward; use 'hardly available' or 'rare' to refer to availability.

× There is no any music teacher UH in nearby UH.

✓ There is no music teacher nearby.

'No any' is ungrammatical; use 'no' alone. 'In nearby' is incorrect preposition and word order; 'nearby' as an adverb/adjective after noun works: 'music teacher nearby' or 'in the nearby area'. Remove fillers.

× Although I do practice online sometimes but I couldn't complete the classes due to my hectic schedule.

✓ Although I sometimes practice online, I couldn't complete the classes due to my hectic schedule.

Combining 'Although' and 'but' is redundant; use either 'although' + clause or 'but'. Place adverb 'sometimes' before 'practice'. Past ability 'couldn't complete' is fine; adjust punctuation and word order for clarity.

× But I always encourage my kids to participate in music classes and take online classes.

✓ But I always encourage my kids to participate in music classes and to take online classes.

Parallel structure requires 'to participate' and 'to take' to match infinitive forms. Alternatively omit 'to' before second verb only if both are bare infinitives; better to keep both for clarity.

× There are several situation when I'm listening music while I'm performing a particular task.

✓ There are several situations when I listen to music while I'm performing a particular task.

'Situation' should be plural 'situations'. Use simple present 'I listen' for habitual actions. Use correct verb pattern 'listen to music'.

× For example, cooking sometime make me bored and monotonous.

✓ For example, cooking sometimes makes me bored and feels monotonous.

'Sometime' should be 'sometimes' adverb. Subject 'cooking' (gerund) requires singular verb 'makes'. The adjective 'monotonous' describes the activity feeling, so rephrase 'feels monotonous' for clarity.

× I to break that silence.

✓ I try to break that silence.

Missing main verb; 'I to break' is ungrammatical. Use 'I try to break' to indicate attempt or 'I break' for habitual action.

× I always listen music while cooking and I also listen music while I'm doing exercise as.

✓ I always listen to music while cooking, and I also listen to music while I'm exercising.

'Listen' requires the preposition 'to' before 'music'. Use 'exercising' or 'doing exercise' but choose one; 'exercising' is more natural. Remove trailing 'as' which is incomplete.