音乐— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and grammatically accurate. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler words (uh), use correct verb forms and plurals, and give one specific reason with a linking word. Aim for 2–4 well-formed sentences.

範例: I prefer happy music. For example, I often listen to hip hop and pop because hip hop energizes me and pop songs make me feel relaxed and cheerful.

建議: Provide a direct answer with a clear subject and correct tense, and connect ideas with linking words. Remove fillers and stray pronouns. Give one brief supporting detail about when or how it affects you.

範例: Yes, happy music does make me more excited. For instance, when I listen to upbeat hip hop while exercising, I feel more energetic and motivated.

建議: Clarify your meaning and use the correct vocabulary. Say directly whether you took lessons, then briefly explain any informal learning, using correct nouns (e.g., "lessons" not "hippopotamus") and verbs. Keep it to 1–2 sentences.

範例: No, I haven't taken formal music lessons, but a classmate who sings well has given me informal tips on breathing and vocal technique, which helped me improve.

建議: Answer directly, use correct grammar and word choice, and organize ideas with linking words. State when you do or do not listen to music and why, giving one specific example of an activity and its effect.

範例: Usually I don't listen to music while studying or preparing for exams because it distracts me. However, I sometimes play soft music while eating or relaxing because it lifts my mood.

× I like to listening, uh, happy music.

✓ I like listening to happy music.

The original uses an infinitive marker 'to' with the -ing form 'listening', which is incorrect. Use either 'like to listen' or 'like listening to'. Also the verb 'listening' requires the preposition 'to' before the object. Suggestion: use 'I like listening to happy music.'

× For example, my favorite music genre is hip hop and the pop song.

✓ For example, my favorite music genres are hip hop and pop.

The sentence mixes singular/plural and unnecessary article 'the' with 'pop song'. 'Genre' should be plural when listing two types, and 'pop' functions as a genre adjective. Use 'genres are hip hop and pop.' This fixes number agreement and article misuse.

× Hip hop makes me uh, feel excited and pop song makes me comfortable and happy, so I like to.

✓ Hip hop makes me feel excited, and pop songs make me feel comfortable and happy, so I like them.

The sentence lacks parallel structure and has noun number errors. Use 'pop songs' (plural) and include object 'them' or complete clause 'so I like them.' Also maintain 'make me feel' consistently. This corrects plural/singular mismatch and sentence completion.

× Uh, she happy hip hop makes me more uplifted.

✓ Uh, happy hip hop makes me feel more uplifted.

The original includes an extraneous pronoun 'she' and omits 'feel' after 'makes me'. Remove 'she' and add 'feel' for grammatical completeness: 'makes me feel more uplifted.'

× Uh, my hobby is listen to music and sing a song.

✓ Uh, my hobby is listening to music and singing songs.

After 'my hobby is' use gerunds, not base verbs. Also use plural 'songs' for naturalness. So: 'my hobby is listening to music and singing songs.'

× So when I have it on, performed on hip hop.

✓ So when I have it on, I perform or sing along to hip hop.

Original is fragmented and ungrammatical: 'performed on hip hop' lacks subject and correct verb form. Clarify intended meaning: if student means they perform, use 'I perform' or 'I sing along to hip hop.'

× No, I haven't taken a hippopotamus, but I have a, uh, my classmate teacher, uh, he told me how to speed it, the birth and, uh, sing a song.

✓ No, I haven't taken any music classes, but one of my classmates, who is a teacher, taught me how to breathe correctly and sing a song.

The student said 'hippopotamus' instead of 'music classes' and misused articles and nouns. Replace nonsense word with 'any music classes' (quantifier 'any' for questions/negatives), fix noun phrases 'one of my classmates who is a teacher', and correct verbs 'taught me how to breathe' (not 'speed it, the birth'). This addresses quantifier, article, and vocabulary errors as well as sentence clarity.

× So, uh, I think, I think to thanks to him.

✓ So, uh, I think, I want to thank him.

'Think to thanks to him' is ungrammatical. Use 'want to thank him' or 'I think I should thank him.' This corrects pronoun/verb misuse and yields a natural expression of gratitude.

× Honestly in studying or eat and practice for exam I haven't listened HIPAA music uh it up it usually disturb my practice but uh it makes uplifted and I feel is.

✓ Honestly, when studying, eating, or practicing for exams, I don't listen to music because it usually disturbs my practice, although sometimes it lifts my mood.

The original has multiple preposition and phrase errors. Use 'when' to introduce the time clause, use gerunds 'studying, eating, practicing', and 'listen to music' requires preposition 'to'. Replace 'haven't listened HIPAA music' with simple present 'I don't listen to music' for habitual action. Clarify 'it makes uplifted and I feel is' to 'it lifts my mood.' This corrects preposition, tense, and sentence structure issues.