音乐— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Avoid repetition and use a clear topic sentence followed by one or two specific supporting details. Replace informal fillers like "literally" if unnecessary. Use linking words (e.g., "for example", "so") to connect ideas and keep the response within 2–3 sentences.

範例: I prefer happy music because it lifts my mood when I'm feeling down. For example, I often play upbeat songs in the background while working, which helps me stay motivated and positive.

建議: Start with a direct topic sentence, then add one concise reason with a specific effect. Avoid repeating the same idea ("boosts my mood" and "feel better") and remove redundant adverbs like "literally."

範例: Yes, happy music makes me feel more excited because its fast tempo and cheerful lyrics energize me, so I feel more focused and upbeat right away.

建議: Give a direct answer and provide one clear reason why you want to take classes, using specific details or an example. Avoid repeating words and keep sentences concise.

範例: No, I haven't taken any music classes, but I would like to in the future because learning an instrument could improve my concentration and allow me to play songs for friends and family.

建議: Answer directly, then offer one or two specific examples of activities and explain briefly how music helps. Remove hesitations and redundant phrases to make the response clearer.

範例: Yes, I often listen to music while studying or cooking because calm background music helps me concentrate and makes routine tasks feel easier and more enjoyable.

× I prefer happy music because it literally cherishes cherishes up my mood when I'm feeling sad.

✓ I prefer happy music because it literally cheers up my mood when I'm feeling sad.

The verb 'cherishes' is incorrect here; the correct verb is 'cheer' used in the phrasal verb 'cheer up'. Also 'cherishes' is repeated. Use the base verb 'cheer' with the particle 'up' to form the intended meaning: 'cheers up'. Remove the duplicated word. Suggestion: learn common phrasal verbs for emotion verbs and avoid repeating words.

× And for example I would listen to happy music when I'm doing something and just put the song on the background.

✓ For example, I would listen to happy music when I'm doing something and just put the song in the background.

The phrase 'put the song on the background' is not idiomatic. Use the preposition 'in' with 'the background' to indicate music playing quietly behind an activity. This is a preposition choice related to verb-preposition collocation. Also move 'for example' or use a comma: 'For example, ...'.

× Yes, happy music makes me feel more excited because it literally boosts my mood and I feel immediately better once I listen to happy music.

✓ Yes, happy music makes me feel more excited because it literally boosts my mood and I feel immediately better when I listen to happy music.

Use 'when I listen' rather than 'once I listen' for natural present reference; 'once' implies a completed action and is more common with past or future contexts. 'When' fits habitual present situations. Suggestion: use 'when' for habitual reactions.

× No, I haven't taken any music classes before, but I definitely would like to take some music classes in future because I think that music classes are really important in in people's life.

✓ No, I haven't taken any music classes before, but I would definitely like to take some in the future because I think that music classes are really important in people's lives.

Add 'the' before 'future' ('in the future') for correct article use. Remove the duplicated 'in'. Use plural 'lives' because 'people' is plural. Also move 'definitely' to a more natural position: 'I would definitely like'. These are article, word order and pluralization issues.

× Yes, I listen to music while doing other things because it makes me feel relaxed and I just it makes when I'm listening to music I just feel better and everything that I do I instantly becomes easy for me to do.

✓ Yes, I listen to music while doing other things because it makes me feel relaxed. When I'm listening to music, I just feel better and everything I do instantly becomes easier for me.

The original contains repetition and faulty sentence structure. Split into two sentences for clarity. Use 'easier' (comparative adjective) rather than 'easy' with 'becomes'. Remove extraneous words ('I just it makes'). Place the adverb 'instantly' before the adjective phrase. Suggestion: avoid repetition and check subject-verb and adjective forms in comparisons.